How big a person's pattern is depends on these three points

Zeng Guofan, a famous minister in the late Qing Dynasty, said: Those who seek great things attach importance to the pattern.

What is the pattern? There are probably two words that can express the meaning of it.

The word "immortal" is that people stand on the peak of the peak, and what they look at is the magnificent galaxy and the vastness of heaven and earth.

The word "customary", people are committed to the bottom of the valley, and everything in sight is trivial.

You are confined to an acre and a three-point field under your feet, or you are looking far away, encompassing thousands of miles;

You are a fly camp dog, coveting the small bargain in front of you, or planning a layout and pursuing long-term interests.

The pattern depends on where you look. How big a person's pattern is depends on these three points.

1

Can swallow grievances

Liu Chuanzhi once said to his successor Yang Yuanqing:

"In life, I am destined to suffer many grievances. The more successful a person is, the more grievances he suffers. ”

And how big a person's pattern is, it depends on how much grievance he can bear and how much he can treat grievances.

At the inauguration of former South African President Mandela, Mandela invited the three guards who had guarded him to watch the ceremony.

He said that those years in prison taught him to control his emotions and to deal with the pain of suffering, and to stand up in full view of the public to express his respect for the three jailers.

This move, which made the people present and the world awe-inspiring, not only made the white South African who had abused him for many years feel helpless, but also showed Mandela's extraordinary temperament and pattern.

Those with small patterns cannot bear half a bit of grievances, and will be tired of grievances and hesitate with depression;

People with a large pattern are not the case, they will laugh at it, they will be detached, and they will even transform potential energy and forge ahead in grievances.

If you can treat each humiliation and injury as a nutritional delicacy you need to transform, you can definitely feed your pattern.

Otherwise, after the incident has passed, others will only remember your outburst of emotions, but they will not remember the reason, leaving others with the impression that you are not tolerant enough.

Swallow the grievances, crush the grievances, and what comes out of the new life is your pattern.

2

Don't put up a shelf, only talk about value

Rousseau once said: The most learned and knowledgeable people are always modest and cautious.

The level of a person's level is not directly related to his education, wealth, and social class, but it is related to his vision, education, and pattern.

Ji Xiaolan, a university scholar, once went to Wutai Mountain to play, walked into the temple, the abbot looked at him, saw his general manners, and said: "Sit", also called "tea", which means to entertain with casual tea.

Knowing that it was a guest from the capital, the abbot stood up respectfully, immediately led Ji Xiaolan into the inner hall, and respectfully said, "Please sit" and "respect tea."

When after some detailed discussion, it was learned that it was Rebbe Shangshu Ji Xiaolan, the abbot looked dejected, humbly led Ji Xiaolan into the Meditation Room, and embarrassedly smiled: "Please come to the table" and "Respect the fragrant tea".

When Ji Xiaolan was leaving, the abbot took out a pen and paper, and must ask Ji Xiaolan to leave the ink treasure to glorify the Zen Temple.

Ji Xiaolan wrote such a couplet: "Sit, please sit, please sit; tea, respect tea, respect tea." ”

The abbot was ashamed.

There are three attitudes toward interpersonal communication: looking down and looking up at peace.

The looking downer is crazy, high above the domineering, and despises the other party;

The one who looks up is weak, sincerely fearful and worshipful, and despises himself;

The level-eyed person and the one who are not humble and do not respect each other, both respect each other and respect themselves.

People with a real big picture never emphasize a sense of identity, nor do they ever write a sense of superiority on their faces.

They can accept and tolerate the differences between people, know how to respect others, never limit themselves to identity, never put up a shelf, and will not be bound.

In this life, people have seen all sentient beings and understood the appearance of sentient beings, so they are tolerant;

Seeing the heavens and the earth, experiencing greatness and smallness, so humble;

Seeing myself, feeling the self and the true self, so open-minded.

So don't be limited by what you think and don't look down on anyone.

The larger the pattern, the more wise and foolish people are, and the more they know how to be humble.

3

Start learning to take responsibility

There is a saying: "All resumes in life must be ranked after the spirit of courage and responsibility." ”

Because with a sense of responsibility, there is responsibility. Responsibility magnifies the pattern of our behavior.

People who have the courage to take responsibility have a broad vision, do not care about immediate interests, and care about longer-term goals.

And people who ignore their responsibilities only think about their own interests and losses, and often lose credibility and lose the pattern.

To be responsible is to be able to carry things.

The ancients said: "The wind knows the grass, and the board knows the loyal subjects." ”

Therefore, whether a person can carry things or not, whether he has responsibility, often depends on difficult times.

In the family, in the unit, people who can carry things never escape, they will take an opportunity when they encounter anything, and deal with various problems steadily.

People who slip away when things happen to them just see everything as a job that has to be done.

The vision is high and the low, you can see it at a glance.

Dare to take responsibility not only means daring to take on heavy responsibilities, but also dare to bear failures, setbacks, criticism and accusations.

The real strong, dare to accept defeat, do not prevaricate, do not make excuses, do not escape from the front, what if we lose, next time we will win back.

Liang Qichao once said: In life, we must know the suffering of responsibility, in order to know the joy of doing our duty.

People live a lifetime, if there is no one worth taking care of themselves, to settle things, what does it mean?

How big a person's pattern is, depends on how much responsibility he can assume.

When things are not afraid of things, dare to bear things, such people, wherever they go, will have their own piece of the sky.