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On the last day of the May Day holiday, when I was camping with my good friends, I mentioned the problem of my children going to school.
She said: After the children go to school, the most uncomfortable thing is to stare at the circle of friends to give teachers praise.
She is a person who basically does not send a circle of friends, basically does not brush the circle of friends, since the child goes to school, teachers will often let parents send circles of friends, such as forwarding the status of the school, for example, forwarding the video made by the teacher, for example, after the teacher sends the status, parents follow the like.
I also met these things she said, I occasionally sent a circle of friends, and occasionally liked my friends, but I still resented following the trend.
Since adding a lot of parents to the parent group, I found that when the three teachers sent the status, including the nurseryman, the parents followed the trend and liked it.
When all the parents like it, only you don't like it, you seem very special, once or twice is not obvious, the number of times, you become the "special" parent.
Why are parents scrambling to "like" teachers first?
Understanding this matter, we understand the principle of parents giving gifts to teachers, in fact, it is the same, but the methods are different.
Parents do not really want to praise the teacher from the bottom of their hearts, but they are afraid that if they do not do this, it will affect the teacher's attitude towards the child.
In fact, for some narrow-minded teachers, this behavior of parents really affects their attitude towards their children.
Praise and gift-giving is a truth, the child put in school, parents are not at ease, in order to allow the teacher to be able to take special care of their children, parents privately give gifts to the teacher.
Because some parents give gifts, the teacher will take special care of individual children, which stimulates the nerves of other parents, and then parents will quietly follow suit, and there is a bad atmosphere of "teachers receiving gifts".
Just liking, just moving your fingers, is relatively easier than that.
These careful thoughts are the parents' nervousness and worry about their children, hoping that the children will at least not be subjected to the "cold violence" of the teacher.
Is it okay not to "like" the teacher?
In fact, these careful thoughts are not just the unilateral concerns of parents.
Parents' attitude towards teachers will really affect the teacher's attitude towards children, which will have a certain impact invisibly.
If you really don't pay attention to the circle of friends very often, and rarely send a status in the circle of friends, the teachers will not mind.
But if the mother often sends the circle of friends, but never cooperates with the teacher to forward and push the school status, and never gives the teacher a thumbs up, the teachers will really mind.
How not to be humble in front of the teacher?
After the child enrolls in school, parents have one more relationship to maintain, that is, to maintain the relationship between the teacher and the parent, this relationship is very delicate, it seems not very important, but the maintenance is not good, and it will really affect the teacher's attitude towards the child.
After my baby entered the nursery, she was more sticky to the teacher, and other children sat on the small bench around the teacher, and she had to sit next to the teacher.
Every time I see the video pushed by the teacher, the baby stays by the teacher's side like a "little teaching assistant", I have a sense of guilt and feel that the child has caused trouble for the teacher.
Initially, I also had the idea of buying some gifts for the teacher and expressing my gratitude to the teacher.
Mom stopped me, mom said: teachers take care of children, this is their duty, they are just small nursery, if the teacher has a bad attitude, the child cries, you can completely not give the child school, the teacher behaves well, there is no need to give them gifts, you do this, not a good start.
After much deliberation, I felt that what she said made sense.
Parents and teachers should maintain a delicate relationship, keep not humble, we can neither look down on the teacher, nor can we be too flattering to the teacher.
If parents disdain forwarding and liking, then set up in groups, the circle of friends is visible to friends, teachers basically can't see the circle of friends, parents don't need to struggle with this matter.
Do not take the initiative to please, after the problem occurs, the first time to find the reason, do not rush to blame the teacher, so that you can keep not humble.
After the child enters school, parents should adhere to three principles
1. Resolutely do not give gifts
"No gifts" is a bottom line, once the parents start to give gifts, after the teacher accepts, the relationship between parents and teachers will change, parents must insist on gifts, in order to let the teacher always be good to the child.
And a teacher who accepts gifts from parents, professional ethics will naturally disappear, the atmosphere will become worse, the teacher's attitude towards children will be determined according to the "performance" of parents, and the teacher will no longer love these children from the bottom of their hearts.
If all parents can insist on not giving gifts, teachers will not have the opportunity to "get worse" even if they have ideas.
2. Understand the problem first
At any time, the child encounters problems in school, first objectively understand the origin of the matter, do not listen to one-sided words, avoid direct stalemate with the teacher, and end badly.
If it is really a teacher's problem, it is natural to hold the teacher responsible, but parents should also consider from the perspective of the teacher, and have more tolerance and understanding.
3. Don't make a fuss at school
After the child enters school, another thing that parents should remember is: at any time, blindly find the school to make a big fuss, after the big fuss, will the child continue to go to school or transfer schools?
Frequent transfer of children to schools is obviously not good for children's growth and socialization, but after the big trouble, do not transfer children to schools, school teachers have concerns about parents, naturally will have concerns about children, which is not good for children.
If the kindergarten child really has a problem, such as being injured, for example, psychologically hurt, parents of course have to find the school to understand the situation, but the premise is to grasp the whole situation, under the premise of accountability, let the school give an explanation.