The living environment has a great impact on the child's personality and habits, and some simple space planning at home can stimulate the child's potential and improve the parent-child relationship. Author | Mother potatoes
The other day, a friend came to me to complain.
Her daughter was in the first year of junior high school last year, and in order to give the child a better learning environment, the family vacated the bedroom with the largest space and the best lighting in the family, and built a study for the child.
As soon as the daughter came home, the family did not even dare to speak loudly, for fear of disturbing the child.
She thought that children can be more attentive and conscious in learning in such a clean, independent and quiet environment.
But the truth "snapped" in the face.
My daughter's homework became more and more procrastinating, and she could grind until midnight every time.
Once, a friend secretly pushed open the crack in the door to find out, but found that the child was not reading at all.
One will touch this, one will cut that, and then simply lie on the bed to play with the mobile phone...
"I was on fire at the time, gave her a stinky scolding, I was really going to be angry to death!"
She said that when she was a child, in the countryside, she used to move a stool to write homework, and where to move, she never let adults worry about it.
And now children, have their own exclusive desk and study, why is it so unconscious?
Where is the desk
Affects the child's self-discipline
This reminds me of the experience of 400,000 Yasushi, a researcher at Keio University in Japan.
The eldest of his family, since he was a child, he did not like to write homework in the study, but especially liked to write homework on the living room dining table.
Younger siblings chase and frolic in the living room, and adults are always worried that too noisy will affect the boss's learning, but the children will not go back to their rooms.
After a period of observation, he found that what the child likes is not the living room, but the feeling of staying by the side of the family.
Later, he spent 6 years visiting 200 families, and the results also confirmed this:
Most of the children who are self-disciplined and focused and have outstanding grades do not like to study alone in their own rooms, but prefer to study in the common areas of the home.
For example, Xueba A, there is a large table in the living room at home, which can be used as a ping-pong table, and the child can play a few balls with his parents and talk and chat together.
It is also the main activity area of the family, the child studies, the father reads the newspaper, and the mother does housework not far away.
A prefers to read a book here than to have a desk in his room.
A said that staying with your parents will make you feel more at ease and study more seriously.
Most parents think that an independent, quiet, functional study is the best learning space for their children.
But on the contrary, children who learn to write homework alone are more likely to be distracted and distracted.
In the TV series "Little Shed", Huan Huan was always asked by her parents to write homework alone in the study.
Occasionally, when the younger brother comes, his parents will take the younger brother away like a great enemy, for fear of disturbing Huan Huan's study.
However, Huan Huan especially likes to desert when writing homework, and when her father does not come in to stare, she secretly reads comics.
When she encountered a problem that could not be done, she began to pick the eraser, and her mood became more and more depressed.
Brain scientists believe that when the human brain works, it is not static, isolated, but constantly changing.
Your child's physical and emotional feelings can also stimulate the brain.
If you put the child in a space without any popularity and noise, or even a closed door, he sits alone at the writing desk, fighting against the sleeper, refusing the temptation of mobile phones and games, and facing many problems that adults are helpless.....
In this case, the child will have a strong sense of being "isolated", and it is naturally difficult for the brain to concentrate on thinking.
When learning becomes a lone soldier, the child will soon lose the desire to take the initiative.
Where a child's desk is placed will affect his mood and efficiency in learning.
Family interactions
Hidden secrets of the child's conscious initiative
Four hundred thousand Jing also mentioned a scholar bully D.
His room was south-facing and well lit, but he never studied at his desk, but held a small foldable table and followed his mother.
Mom rested on the couch, and he moved the small low table to the living room;
Mom was drying clothes in the yard, and he moved the little low table to the shade of the tree.....
While the mother is working, she can see the child's learning situation, and this loose state of supervision will not cause pressure to the child.
When D encounters a problem, he can ask his mother for help in time; when his mother sees D studying seriously, he will also give praise in time to help the child build confidence.
At this time, the desk becomes a "tool" for the child's emotional connection with the parents.
Professor Li Junlei of the Harvard University School of Education once said that what is most lacking between us and children is human interaction.
He also stressed that the eye interaction with adults and the all-round contact with the overall perception will stimulate children's desire for development, which cannot be replaced by any high technology.
If you want your child to fall in love with learning, self-awareness, family companionship, warm atmosphere, happy communication.... These real feelings are more important than anything else.
Remember the little girl Enya who studied under the board?
The parents used cardboard boxes and wooden planks to set up a simple small desk in a small space. Parents sell brine dishes on the board, and children concentrate on online lessons under the board.
The surrounding people are bustling and the environment is noisy, but the little girl is still very focused and devoted, and there is no slight displeasure and irritability on her face.
When someone asked her, "What do you think of this little study?" ”
Enya said she likes to study under the board because it can be with her parents.
She can see her parents busy, and she will not be alone when she wants to talk. When she has a question that she can't, she can also get the attention and response of her parents immediately.
As education expert Sun Yunxiao said, with a good relationship, there is a good education.
In fact, what children really need is not how good a house or how expensive a desk is, but to be able to stay with their parents.
Only when children are in the same environment as their parents and family, chatting, communicating and learning together, children can feel warmth and fun in this positive interaction, thus stimulating the motivation to actively learn.
Behind the child's internal drive, it is inseparable from good parent-child interaction, as well as the intention and companionship of parents.
Good family layout, raise school bully children
How to arrange the learning environment at home so that children can fall in love with learning and cultivate a self-disciplined child?
In the living room there is an open bookshelf and a TV set is optional.
The living room is the activity center of the modern family, if the most prominent place is the TV, then the child comes back from school naturally has no intention of learning.
Many parents come home from work, used to lie on the couch, turn on the TV for a few hours, but also have a negative impact on their children.
There is a father in Hunan who built a "library" at home in order to make his son fall in love with reading.
When my son was 2 years old, the collection had reached 20,000 books. Now, ten years later, my son has long loved to read.
Buy a big table and create a shared space for the whole family.
In the picture book "The Big Table of Happiness", all the happy times of The Rabbit Grandma's family of eight are inseparable from this big table.
They eat, drink tea, chat, rest, and when Grandma Bunny is young, she will iron clothes, make cakes, peel beans, and mend shirts on the table.
The children, on the other hand, read, write homework, draw, and play chess on the table. Sometimes when I am tired of studying, I will hide under the table and play hide-and-seek and go.
Placing a large table in the dining room or living room can make the family feel the presence of each other, and the psychological distance between parents and children will be closer.
More importantly, in such a shared space where the whole family can freely join the conversation, the learning atmosphere is better and the child's initiative will be improved.
My cousin's child was just admitted to a 985 major university last year.
Every night, they say, they and their children have a regular learning process.
It is a family sitting at a table to discuss children's homework, sometimes mathematics, sometimes history, and everyone is free to speak, discuss, and answer.
The process of constantly asking questions, thinking and explaining can stimulate his motivation to learn and further consolidate his knowledge.
Create a "guerrilla"-style reading corner.
When my home was renovated, in addition to the living room, it abandoned the traditional "sofa-coffee table-TV" layout and replaced it with a bookcase.
In other corners, there are also various small "reading corners" to ensure that children can get books to read at any time.
For example, on the sideboard of the dining table, there are some picture books that children love to read;
The balcony is better lighting, put a small building table and study table, next to a small bookshelf, with literacy cards, practice books, painting tools, etc.;
At the head of the bed in the children's room, there are some goodnight stories, and before going to bed, I or my father will read with the children.....
As children get older, the types of books can change.
This little bit of careful thinking can make reading and learning fully integrated into the child's life.
Occasionally change the layout of the home to create a sense of freshness.
Among the families of the school bully visited by 400,000 Jing, there is another interesting phenomenon:
Many school bullies like to change the learning location, because the new environment will bring new stimuli to the child's brain and help the child to learn more efficiently and autonomously.
So there is no need to require children to study in one place every day.
The best way is to make any space in the home a place for children to learn, such as preparing a small desk for children to move.
Every once in a while, you can also adjust the decoration and layout of the guest dining room and children's room to create a fresh feeling for children.
For children, it doesn't matter where they learn. Who to study with is at the heart of the matter.
Rousseau says in Emile:
"The best education is an education that does nothing:
Children do not see education happening, but it really affects their hearts and helps them to reach their potential, which is the best education under the sky. ”
Instead of going to great lengths to help your child create a seemingly perfect study, give your child a warm, responsive, positive family atmosphere.
The children raised by such a family will certainly not be bad.