He Suohuan, a writer of gender-emotional psychology, writes sentient stories, interesting strangers, and material knowledge.
The way men and women think in their relationships, the level of commitment, and the way they control their feelings are different.
For example:
Boys like a girl, they tend to take the initiative and bravely express their hearts; whether it is success or failure, they are eager to try it.
Girls, on the other hand, are just the opposite.
Girls' attitude towards feelings is introverted and shy; they will not easily confide their feelings, for fear that they will not be valued if they are too active.
There are also some differences between men and women in the matter of breaking up.
Boys are "results-oriented" thinking, and when they tell you to "break up," they are informing you.
If you don't love you or break up with you for some factor, boys will generally tell you bluntly, and the tone is irreparable.
And girls are tentative, and the breakup mentioned by girls can be largely recovered.
So, what are the obvious signs when a guy doesn't love you?
We mainly analyze from three aspects.
Degree of giving, degree of communication, degree of initiative.
-01
Gradually reduce the effort on you
There's a line that goes something like this:
"Normally, a man doesn't call you, indicating that he doesn't want to call you; or that he doesn't call you, just isn't interested in seeing you. If a man treats you like he doesn't care, then he really doesn't love you. There are no exceptions. ”
In the process of getting along between men and women, men's behavior patterns, the degree of getting along, and the investment and dedication in feelings can explain a lot of problems.
Like what:
When a guy likes you, he is willing to invest a lot of time, energy and money in you in order to pursue you.
What you want to eat, just one sentence, no matter how far you drive, he will also try to help you finish.
What you want, just mention it briefly, and he will remember it in his heart.
But such a payment is his means of pursuing you.
And when he doesn't love you, the contribution to you will be reduced to zero.
No longer paying for you, reducing investment, but also reducing your own loss in this relationship.
Giving includes both material and emotional giving.
Reducing material giving is only part of it, and his emotional giving is also much lower.
When he is in love, he cares about your mood every day, cares about your feelings, and will do a lot of things to please you and coax you.
But when something goes wrong with your feelings, you can only feel his indifference.
It's a way of not having to pretend, and even if you sit face to face, you can feel his intentional or unintentional alienation.
-02
Rarely communicate with you
Psychologically, it is believed that:
One of the signs of a person falling in love with you is to see if he has a strong desire to share when he faces you.
In a way, the desire to share represents the degree of affection he has for you.
Sharing is equivalent to showing yourself a little bit in front of you, and can also be understood as the degree of "self-exposure".
In an intimate relationship, the degree of self-exposure of two people depends on the depth of their feelings.
Are you talking to your parents very casually and relaxed?
When you chat with your lover, do you have nothing to say, nothing to talk about?
This is because you trust each other enough in your hearts, and your feelings are built on a deep enough foundation.
Conversely, what are the signs that men don't love you?
I don't want to share it with you, I don't want to chat with you anymore, and I don't even have the interest in replying to your messages.
A female reader left me a message.
She said that the relationship with her husband is like a stranger living under the same roof.
Except when the child is at home, the two people will talk about the child's learning, about the child's education.
The rest of the time, the two people rarely share when they come home from work.
After eating, one hid in the study, and the other cleaned up in the living room to watch the drama.
The ordinary life is not terrible, the terrible thing is that two people have nothing to say, only coldness.
Signs that a person doesn't love you can be seen from stopping sharing and not wanting to communicate with you.
-03
No more proactive
Inactivity includes two levels.
One level is: physiological inactivity.
Don't take the initiative to hug, hold hands, and don't want to take the initiative to find you.
Every time you take the initiative to find him, whether it is a chat or a date, he rarely takes the initiative to ask you out.
This is very different from when I was just in love.
When we first got together, he always took the initiative to invite you, pursue you, and be more attentive to you.
On the other hand, there is the indifference to feelings.
You are the only one who is working hard to further stabilize your feelings, while he is acting slack and perfunctory.
It seems that the quality of the relationship has nothing to do with him.
There is a sense of "broken jar breaking" casualness.
There is a word in psychology called "emotional linkage".
It can be understood that when we love someone deeply, we will consider everything from the perspective of the other party and feel the emotional fluctuations of the other party.
If the other person loves you, he will hurt you, try to understand you, read you.
On the contrary, when he does not love you, he will end the emotional connection with you.
Today's Topic:
Can you feel it when he doesn't love you?
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