Text/BeiShu Source: Beishu Youyue (beishu2016)
The writer Su Qian once said:
"Choose a man, or choose a good one that hurts you." Love, originally a very vain word, is not only a simple metaphysical, but also some real care. ”
Deeply.
Every woman hopes to be really cared for by her lover, and she hopes that that person will feel sorry for herself and pay attention to herself, so as to experience sweetness and happiness, and make life more complete.
It's just that hope doesn't equal reality.
In the relationship, many women are passively waiting for the love of men, thinking that this is a natural thing, but in fact, the truth of feelings is an interaction and game.
Therefore, if you want men to hurt you and care about you, you still need to move your mind and use a routine, especially to learn these three "no".
-01-
Not "sensible"
We often hear people say that "a spoiled woman has the best life", that's because most men like to be the "strong" party in the relationship, hoping to be relied on by women and worshiped by women, thus stimulating the most instinctive desire for protection in their bones.
But some women are not well versed in such a truth, always in a relationship to behave very sensibly, as if everywhere can do a good job, do not need to add trouble to men.
For example, the grievances in the heart can be swallowed by themselves, difficult things can be solved by themselves, and they can cut thorns outside, and they can be a good wife and mother at home, and they can carry everything alone.
In the face of such a woman, the man's desire for protection has nowhere to be released, and over time, he will put away the pity in his heart.
They will feel in their hearts that they are not needed, and you are living well without him.
In fact, a really smart woman often knows how to "show weakness".
As Li Shanglong said: "Smart girls with strong hearts will definitely show weakness, especially to the boys they like." Or, in this life, only show weakness to him. ”
Reasonable "showing weakness" is not really weak, but to give men more opportunities to protect themselves and cherish themselves.
Not "sensible" at the right time is not really unreasonable, but it is easier to get the favor and consideration of men.
You must know that the more mature the rice ear, the more you know how to bend down, learn not to "understand things", and it is also a kind of wisdom and foolishness.
-02-
Not "complicated"
We can often see that many women in life encounter problems will not communicate directly with men, waiting for men to guess, to epiphany, in the end, one does not say, one does not ask, one does not chase, one does not wait, two people will only gradually drift apart.
The writer Westow said: "To speak bluntly is a positive attitude towards a problem." ”
This phrase applies especially between the sexes.
Because the more intimate the relationship, the more contradictions will arise, and only by direct communication and not escaping can the contradictions be truly resolved.
Remember a saying on the Internet that said it very well:
"The best way to live in life is to live a little simpler and love more realistically."
Oh, yes! Only by living simply can we live freely; only by loving the truth can we reap happiness.
So, women have to learn to simply deal with various problems in the relationship, what you want men to do, to directly mention the needs; you want men to give you more attention, to directly tell him your desires; you want men to understand you, to learn to dissect themselves, not to hide; you have difficulties, to seek help directly from him.
Don't think that if a man loves you, he will definitely have insight into your heart, simply, you give his heart to him, he will be more calm to deal with, the right medicine.
Remember, true and long-lasting love does not rely on freshness, but on realism.
Because only simple and true, everything you have is the most solid!
-03-
Not "scared"
Everyone is afraid of losing when they are in love, afraid of being rejected by the other party, afraid of the other party's boredom, always want to show the best of themselves, and do their best to keep each other.
Because of this, many people lose themselves in a relationship.
Nevertheless, women must understand a truth, no man will like a woman who has lost herself, and the reason why you will be loved is because you are worthy, because you have an independent soul and attract the other party to love you, not that you ask for it with a humble appearance.
Love cannot be exchanged for humility, and even if it could, it may not be what you want.
So don't "fear" anything, and don't face love with a "flattering" heart.
In fact, many times the reason why we are "afraid" is more from the inner desire for love and the worry about losing love.
The only answer to this problem is: face yourself, love yourself well, and try to be an "unexpected" woman.
As this sentence says:
"You are not the whole of my life, I am not your only hope, you have your gorgeous life, I have my future to look forward to, we can hug the group to warm up, but also can be wonderful." 」
Therefore, before "being afraid", let us first learn to love ourselves, because in this world, it is difficult to get the love of others, but it is easy to get our own love.
I think that only when people learn to love themselves is the beginning of the final romance, and can they live up to their lives.
Finally, may we all love each other more and love ourselves, because only if you love yourself with your heart, will someone come to hurt you and get more love around you.
- END -
*Image source: petal net, sugar net
▼
Want to know more about The Companion Reader?
Say goodnight with you every night