Author | Fan Deng Reading· Zhang Woman
Anchor | Fan Deng Reading · Yang Gun Gun
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Dear book lovers, good evening
Welcome to Fan Deng's reading character column - "Stars".
Reading the Stars Shine · Experience extraordinary life.
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The protagonist who appears today has received a total of 36 doctorates in his lifetime and has also been nominated for the Nobel Prize in Literature.
Known for advocating "vernacular language", he is known as a pioneer of the New Culture Movement.
He is famous, but he is a "good man" who is afraid of his wife!
Let's walk into the legendary life of Hu Shi, a modern Chinese thinker, writer and philosopher
On February 24, 60 years ago, at a celebration cocktail party, Hu Shi was very happy, and many friends and students gathered to freely exchange academic and cultural views.
At the age of 71, he also gave an impromptu speech, but just after the speech, he suddenly had a heart attack and never woke up.
On the way out of the funeral, from Taipei to Nangang, every family burns incense, every household pays tribute, and there are more than 100,000 people who send funerals along the road.
At that time, "from the president and chairman to the enterprise platform, the chef, the peddler, the pawn, the vegetable carrier, and the pulp seller, there were hu Shizhi's friends."
"My friend Hu Shizhi" was a popular phrase at that time.
The people who interacted with Hu Shi praised him, no matter what the differences in concepts and their identities.
Such a good popularity is inseparable from his consistent good temper.
He does this to his friends, and even more so to his family.
And the attitude towards family members hides the most authentic character of a person.
Hu Shi once said that to look at a country's civilization, one only needs to examine three things:
The first is to see how they treat children; the second is to see how they treat women; and the third is to see how they use their leisure time.
As the standard-bearer of the New Culture Movement, Hu Shi set a good example in all three things.
And putting "how to treat children" in the first place shows the status of children in his heart.
In Hu Shi's view, raising children is a spiritual sustenance and a warm process of enjoying family affection, and it is also a valuable experience to participate in the growth of a real life.
As he says in his article "My Son":
"I raised you not by grace, but by biological instincts of blood.
Therefore, since I have no gratitude to you, you do not have to repay me.
On the contrary, I want to thank you, because with your participation my life is more complete. ”
Hu Shi's words expressed the highest state of love for his children.
Parents should be grateful and cherish that this innocent and lovely child in front of them can become our children, which is a great fate.
Fist and fist pity the child, cut the heart of the father.
In addition to stressing equality, Hu Shi respects the choice of his children, and he advocates letting them live their own lives and follow their own paths.
Encourage them to learn to take responsibility for society and others in their independent lives.
In February 1929, Hu Shi took his eldest son Hu Zuwang to Suzhou to give a speech.
After a day at a friend's school, the child loves the local school.
After returning, the couple agreed to send him to the attached middle school of Shanghujiang University in Suzhou.
Before leaving, Hu Shi wrote a family letter to Zu Wang, upset that he had left the family at a young age. But he stressed:
"We think for you that leaving home is the best way to do it.
The first is to discipline you in an independent life; the second is to practice a sociable life; and the third is to make yourself feel the necessity of hard work. ”
He also told the child: The ambition should be in the heart, and it must not be put on the mouth, let alone on the face.
If mother's love brings satisfaction to children, then father's love points the way forward.
Because of his emphasis on equality and respect for children's preferences and choices, he followed Zu Wang's desire to choose his favorite mechanical major, and became an alumnus of Cornell University in the United States.
Later, Hu Zuwang became an engineer, and his marriage was even happier.
Even for his frail and sickly youngest son, Hu Sidu, Hu Shi asked him to leave his home in Shanghai and study at Southwest United University alone, and called the lack of premature independence the "most unfortunate point" for Hu Sidu.
Think of the years when the soldiers were in chaos, but Hu Shi dared to let his son who was in middle school leave his family and "practice an independent life."
Such a "godson sutra" is still worth learning from today.
As Hu Shi said, "You are free, I love you; but I will never control your life 'in the name of love.'" ”
As a parent, that's the way it should be.
In the autumn of 1917, Hu Shi returned to China after studying abroad.
In December of the same year, obeying his mother's orders, he and Jiang Dongxiu consummated their marriage.
This year, Hu Shi was 26 years old, and in the more than ten years from engagement to marriage, he and Jiang Dongxiu had never met.
After marriage, Hu Shi was famous.
He is also not afraid of this matter spreading in Peking University, and often collects famous stories of ancient and modern Chinese and foreign people who are afraid of their wives and tell them to everyone.
Once a friend in Paris sent more than a dozen copper coins with the three letters "PPT" on them.
After Hu Shi saw it, he joked with his friends that when the "Afraid Wife Association" was established, he would use this copper coin as a membership badge.
Jiang Dongxiu loves mahjong and often violates the rules and secretly plays in the dormitory.
Hu Shi repeatedly tried unsuccessfully to dissuade him, and finally in order to satisfy his wife, he bought a house and moved out.
In particular, after becoming the president of the China Research Institute, the family moved to Taipei.
He even spent thousands of dollars to buy two suites, one for the whole family, and one for Jiang Dongxiu to rub mahjong.
There was no time to cook, so she boiled the pot of tea leaves and eggs, and Hu Shi also enjoyed it.
No wonder Zhang Ailing said enviously:
"The marriage of Hu Shi and Jiang Dongxiu is a rare and happy arranged marriage."
The famous historian Tang Degang also commented that Jiang Dongxiu "became the last blessed person in traditional Chinese society."
A man's attitude toward his wife determines the temperature of marriage.
Hu Shi's respect and love made his marriage with Jiang Dongxiu hide unusual affection.
A good marriage often needs a man with a soft heart who knows how to appreciate and be considerate of the other half.
Because of this, the shrewd and capable Jiang Dongxiu also did his best to share the burden of the family.
Not only did he do filial piety for Hu Shi, but he also raised his son after marriage and kept the family in good order.
She was as enthusiastic as Hu Shi, paving roads and bridges for her hometown, funding Lin Yutang, Ji Xianlin and others to study, and earning Hu Shi a lot of good reputations.
Jiang Dongxiu's greatest influence on Hu Shi's life was to persuade him not to engage in politics.
Born in a chaotic world, she did not encourage her husband to become a high official and pursue glory and wealth. I only ask him to do learning, teaching, educating people, and living a peaceful and peaceful life.
Hu Shi also refused to take up any position, but at a time of national peril, Hu Shi was appointed ambassador extraordinary and plenipotentiary of the Republic of China to the United States.
To this end, he wrote to Jiang Dongxiu:
"Now that I'm out to do things, I often feel ashamed in my heart, and I can't stand you.
You always advise me not to go on the political road, this is you helping me... As soon as the war was over, I still taught my books. ”
One is a young professor in the United States, and the other is a small-footed woman in the countryside, and the identities and status of the two are completely incompatible.
But they supported each other and foamed at each other until they reached the end of their lives.
Hu Shi once said that the secret of marriage is four words: long and respectful.
The so-called respect is respect, respect for each other's personality, tolerance of each other's shortcomings, in order to have permanent happiness!
If there is a husband like this, the husband will ask for it.
When Hu Shi was 4 years old, his father died, and his mother Feng Shundi was just 23 years old.
She remembered her husband's dying instructions to let Hu Shi read more and be a useful person.
At that time, every day at dawn, he would listen to his mother get up early.
Talk about what I did wrong yesterday and say the wrong thing, so that my mother can rest assured that she will study hard.
In the academy, he was often the first to arrive. When the gentleman came, he memorized the book and went home for breakfast.
The family had no money, and Hu Shi's eldest brother was a loser.
Every New Year's Day, there are always many people in the family to collect debts, sitting in the hall and not leaving, but his mother does not change her face and calmly copes.
Because it was the New Year, his mother did not blame his eldest brother for not being angry or new year's.
Hu Shi could not bear to see his mother so reclusive, so he developed a meek character from an early age, filial piety and obedience to his mother everywhere.
In 1904, with the encouragement of his mother, Hu Shi, who was only 13 years old, went to Shanghai to study.
Before leaving, according to his mother's will, he became engaged to Jiang Dongxiu, who was one year older.
Although he was still an ignorant teenager and had never met Jiang Dongxiu, he did not raise any objections.
He knew that his mother was not easy, and he was wandering outside to study, but fortunately Jiang Dongxiu did filial piety on his behalf, and Hu Shi was full of gratitude to both of them.
In November 1918, Hu Shi's mother died of illness at the age of 45.
At this time, it was less than a year before Hu Shi's marriage, and upon learning of this news, Hu Shi hurried back to his hometown with Jiang Dongxiu to mourn.
Grief-stricken, he wrote the "First Mother's Journey":
"Birth has not been nourished, illness has not been served, hard work has not been able to share the slightest responsibility, and life and death have not been able to face one side."
Life is miserable, why is it so! ”
Hu Shi once said: "The most hateful thing in the world is like an angry face." ”
So he proposed that "tolerance is more important than freedom", and that a lifetime of generosity and forgiveness was taught by his mother.
In 1930, Hu Shi, who was already middle-aged, wrote an autobiographical essay, "My Mother."
There are no flowery words throughout, but it is overflowing with sincere emotions:
"If I can learn the slightest bit of good temper, if I can learn a little kindness to others, if I can forgive people and be considerate of people - I have to thank my loving mother." 」
"A model of old morality in the new culture, a teacher of new ideas in the old ethics."
It is a picture given to Hu Shi by others, which can be described as a proper and pertinent summary and evaluation of his life.
According to research, Hu Shi received a total of 36 doctorates in his lifetime, and was also nominated as a candidate for the Nobel Prize in Literature.
He is famous for advocating "vernacular literature" and leading the new cultural movement, and is recognized by international scholars as the "father of the Chinese Renaissance".
It was such a good pioneer, but he regarded the family as extremely important.
The main way to judge whether a man is reliable or not is to see how he treats women and children, that is, how to take care of parents, wives and children.
Going out from his hometown to see China, and then going out from China to see the world, Hu Shi's life can be described as magnificent.
But his attachment and longing for his family have never stopped and forgotten.
If there is a true gentleman in the world, there must be a man named Hu Shi.
Author | Zhang Woman, master of communication, former emotional storytelling reporter of The City Daily, is now a middle-aged girl who writes under the name of her daughter.
Column Director | Cheng zi
Typography | Zheng to the north
Image | The pictures in this article come from the Internet, and are invaded and deleted
Music | Sorin -