The biggest challenges for leaders are:
Not an understanding of leadership,
Rather, it is impossible to put understanding into practice.
Leadership,
Can not rely on pure training or lecture acquisition,
Need to focus on reality,
Changing the status quo, integrating teams,
Only by putting it into action can we truly achieve the goal.
—— Marshall Goldsmith
Marshall Goldsmith
One of the world's best executive leadership coaches, known as the "world's first leadership coach". He is a pioneer and authority on leadership coaching, named one of the world's "Five Most Respected Executive Coaches" by Forbes, "Top Ten Senior Management Educators" by the Wall Street Journal, and "World's Best Coaches" by the American Management Association.
This video is conducted by the world's top coach Marshall in conversation with Judith Glaser, author of "Dialogue IQ", detailing the leaders to achieve excellence through three-level dialogue, bringing the science of dialogue IQ to reality, and establishing a practical guidance framework for people to "three-level dialogue".
Judith Glazer
(Judith Glaser)
Judith Glaser is an American author, scholar, business executive, and organizational anthropologist. She is the founder and CEO of Benchmark Communications, Inc., a Boston-based executive counseling and management consulting firm, chairman of The Creating WE Institute, and has advised several prominent Fortune 500 companies. Clients she has served throughout her career include Ikaru, Citibank, Pfizer, Burberry, American Airlines and Verizon.
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Three minutes to understand the dialogue IQ
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You know you're an expert in conversational intelligence. One thing you brought up that I just love is the concept of asking questions.
When you don't have the answers yet and that sounds at one level obvious isn't that what we always do. But as I've talked to you about that or else no that's not what we always do in fact. Sometimes we seldom do that. Can you kind of elaborate that? And give our viewers some ideas.
As we all know, you are an expert in the field of conversational IQ. One of the concepts you put forward that I really like is asking questions. This sounds obvious in some way when you don't have the answer yet, which is contrary to what we often do. But as I said, it's actually not something we often choose to do. Sometimes we rarely do that. Can you elaborate? And give our audience some ideas?
Yeah so it turns out years ago 20 years ago I was in the UK working with an executive. And I was keeping track of the questions that he asked. That were leading questions. And the questions that he asked that had where he had no answers. There was zero on had no answers.
Yes, so it turns out that 20 years ago I was working with a supervisor in the UK. I kept a record of the questions he asked. This is a guiding question. The questions he asked that had no answers. There is no answer to this.
They were all leading questions.
They are all questions of guidance.
And when I explained it to him, he had no idea that what he was doing. He really thought that he was helping someone by giving them you know the answers and so forth.
When I explained it to him, he didn't know what he was doing. He really thinks he's helping people, giving them answers and so on.
So I made that a study and I'm still doing it. Because 99% of the people really have difficulty asking questions where they don't have answers. Because then they get kind of anxiety like I should have known it. They go into their head. People would have expected me to say that and know it. And now I don't and I might look stupid. So that's the tape that they play in their mind.
So I took it as a study, and now I'm continuing. Because 99% of people have a hard time asking questions that don't have an answer. Because then they will have a kind of anxiety, like I should know about it. This feeling naturally enters their brains. People would expect me to say that and know it. Now I don't know, then I might look stupid. This is the tape that loops in their minds.
But when we ask questions for which we don't have answers what it does to another human being. Is it actually opens up a conversation with them enables them to think in new ways. Because you're not asking. You're setting up a question without an obvious answer. You don't know. You're not pushing them into it right. And the conversation that ensues is what I call a level three conversation.
But what it does to another person when we ask a question we don't have an answer to. It actually opens up a conversation with them, enabling them to think in new ways. Because you're not asking, you're setting up a question with no obvious answer. You don't know. You didn't push them into the right place. The conversation that follows is what I call the third level of dialogue.
It goes deeper. Both people start to connect on discovery. So it takes them into what I call sharon discover mode, which actually changes their chemistry so they bond in better ways and they look forward. And that open space of I don't have the answer changes to oh my god what are we going to learn together.
He will go deeper. The two men began to make contact on discovery. So it puts them into what I call "Sharon Discovery Mode," which actually changes their chemistry, so they bind together in a better way and they look forward. That kind of open space where I don't have an answer becomes "My God, what are we going to learn together."
You know this is a fantastic example. The greatest example I can think of in my own coaching experiences my good friend Alan milady who is a co forward. When he first went to ford there were under tough times. And Alan rather than providing an answer said I don't have a solution either, I don't have the answer,why don't we work together and ask a lot of other people to help us solve this problem where we don't have the answer?
You know that's a wonderful example. The biggest example I can think of in my coaching career is my best friend Alan Muladi. The first time he went to Ford, it was in a tough time. And Alan is not providing an answer, but saying that I don't know what the solution is, nor what the answer is, so why don't we work together to find more people to help us solve this problem that we don't know the answer to?
Now let me give you my definition of brilliant. Brilliant is when somebody does something, it seems obvious in hindsight, but you've never seen it before. This to me what you've just said is brilliant as a leader getting up there and asking a question. When you don't have the answer and if the other person doesn't have the answer making it okay.
Now let me tell you my definition of brilliance. Brilliant is when someone does something that seems obvious in hindsight but you've never seen it before. To me, what you just said is good, stand up as a leader and ask a question. When you don't have an answer, it doesn't matter if the other person doesn't have an answer either.
Yeah. Say why don't we work together and solve the problem. Alan's feeling wasn't about 10min after they had a dialogue, the problem got solved. Once I get over that egotistical macho I have to know everything nonsense and said we're both human beings, there is a problem. I don't know it you don't know it it's okay. Let's work together and find the answer. That is a fantastic concept thank you you're welcome
yes. Say why don't we cooperate and then fix the problem. Alan's feeling wasn't that the problem was solved 10 minutes after they had a conversation. Once I got over this conceited machismo, I had to know that everything was nonsense, that we were all human, and that there was a problem. I don't know, you don't know, it doesn't matter. Let's work together to find the answer. It's a very good concept.
About Marshall Goldsmith
Known as the world's number one leadership coach, he has received a Lifetime Achievement Award from the American Academy for Management (IMS) and has been invited to coach more than 150 CEOs and their management teams individually, including World Bank President Yong Kim, Walmart CEO Doug Macmillan, and former Ford CEO Alan Mulally.
The heavyweight in the international coaching world is Marshall Goldsmith.
Marshall is a pioneer in the field of global leadership development and the most valuable star executive coach in the United States, not only as a leadership coach for CEOs and executives of many of the world's best-in-class companies, but also as a global team mentor and conference speaker, and he also owns several Wall Street Journal best-selling lists.
No.1 He has a remarkable drive for diligence and self-control
Marshall's work intensity is very high. He is a United Multimillion Member, flying up to 1.1 million miles. He teased himself even more than in the movie "In the Clouds", George W. Bush. Clooney plays a career as a consultant who spends almost his days on airplanes.
He arrived at the venue almost earlier than any student and left later than anyone else. For the meeting that starts at 9 o'clock in the morning, he will come to the venue two hours in advance to prepare; he will never be absent for the dinner party; anyone on the scene who wants to take pictures with him, sign, buy books, he never refuses...
It can be said that in Marshall's level of coaching, almost no one is more diligent than him!
No.2 Keen observation ability and appeal
He has a technique that, in the midst of laughter, is both comprehensible and at the same time immediately and skillfully letting the other party know his observations, and even unable to reject his opinions. He kept exploring some of the qualities that stand out in people, and he didn't hesitate to point them out.
He can use the power of language and speech to unload people's defenses, gain the trust of others, subvert your thinking, and even directly challenge your existing ideas, so that the listener will feel empowered.
No.3 Be authentic and have excellent emotional intelligence
His presentation is very real, and he never seems to hide it, telling some small hypocrisies that ordinary people do not like to admit. This will make the person who chats with him feel that he is quite safe, and he has been accepted by him and let go of his guard.
Marshall also taught at UCLA for many years in his early years, and in his youth he was also a lecturer outside the university as a corporate lecturer. He also humorously admitted that teaching outside for a day at that time was worth the salary of a professor for two weeks.
The starting point for entering the executive coaching industry is also the coaching order he took off the coaching order by coincidence after a class as a training teacher in the company.
In your communication with Marshall, you can often appreciate his high emotional intelligence, that is, situation awareness, self-awareness and control.
A summary of coaching questioning techniques
As an executive coach, asking questions is a must-have skill. The coach's question must be enlightening, not critical. Of course, these questions are not only useful for coaches, but also for leaders who want to use a coaching approach to lead their teams. Below we've put together some coaching-style questioning frameworks that we hope will inspire and touch you:
01
Helps leaders reach out to employees
Coaching issues of ideal state and goals
(1) What are the goals you want to achieve?
(2) What are they specifically?
(3) What is the value and significance to you to achieve this goal?
(4) Why are you trying to achieve this goal?
(5) What if this goal is achieved now?
(6) How important is this goal to you?
(7) What loss will you bring if the goal cannot be achieved?
(8) What kind of situation will you know that your goal has been achieved after the occurrence? (What are the signs of your goal achievement?) Please list 1, 2, 3 items)
(9) When you see, hear, or feel something, will you know you've achieved your goal?
The purpose of asking such a question is to trigger the other party's internal vision, internal hearing, and internal feeling. The higher the inner clarity of the coached person, the higher the impetus for action and the higher the probability of realization.
02
Status Quo = Present Real Situation = Present Reality
Coaching issues that help leaders clarify the status quo
(1) What is your current situation?
(2) Say a little more about your current situation.
(3) In addition to what you just said... Besides, what else?
(4) Let me repeat what you just said about A, is that right?
(5) What is the real cause behind Question A?
(6) What have you done to achieve or achieve your goals?
(7) What are the factors that are holding you back from achieving your goals?
(8) What do you think is missing in order to effectively achieve this goal?
(9) How do you know this?
(10) What is your current situation?
03
Helps leaders spark employees
Coaching issues to achieve goals
(1) How do you plan to solve the problem you just said?
(2) What do you think you can do to better achieve your goals?
(3) If you just didn't achieve what you wanted, what strategies and steps would you take next?
(4) What are your next actions?
(5) When do you plan to start?
(6) After passing the coach just now, how likely do you think it is to achieve the goal?
(7) What methods have you come up with to achieve your goals? What are the differences?
(8) What resources are available to support you in achieving your goals?
(9) If your current resources cannot support you to achieve your goals, what resources do you think you need?
(10) In order to make your goal more certain, what other channels will you open up? What additional resources are available?
04
10 questions that lead to real goals
(1) What do you want?
(2) How does your desired goal help you?
(3) How do you know you have reached your goal?
(4) How do others know you have reached your goal?
(5) Where do you want the results to appear? When does it appear? With whom?
(6) What are the factors that prevent you from reaching your goals?
(7) If you achieve this goal, how will it affect your life?
(8) What are the capabilities and resources you already have to help you reach your goals?
(9) What additional abilities and resources are needed to help you reach your goals?
(10) What do you decide to do?
05
Helps coaching leadership to identify
8 questions of appropriate, good and feasible objectives
(1) What do you really want?
(2) What does this goal bring to you?
You can keep asking repeatedly. The deepest levels of systems, identities, beliefs, and values are the true values that this goal represents.
(3) How do you know you have achieved your goals?
Enhance inner impulses through audiovisual sensations and enhance clarity of goals.
(4) When, where and with whom do you achieve the results you want?
Clarify the environmental conditions and resources of the target, so as to be more objective and scientific.
(5) How will the results you want to achieve affect other aspects of your life?
Find the inner driving force.
(6) Why haven't you reached that result before today?
Identify limited beliefs and the factors that constrain success.
(7) What resources and capabilities do you already have to help you achieve your goals? What resources and capabilities do you need? How do you get these resources and capabilities you need?
(8) How are you going to do it? What is the first step? If that doesn't work, what's your plan?
Support each other to find the path and more possibilities to achieve their goals.
06
The following coaching skills can support leaders,
By helping employees clarify the status quo,
Seeing the essence of the problem and the root cause of the problem,
Achieve the purpose of supporting subordinates to have better job performance...
(1) In real life, what is the most intolerable thing you cannot tolerate?
(2) What is the most intolerable thing in your work?
(3) What do you feel most stressful about you or what pains you the most?
(4) What is your most dissatisfied/unacceptable thing in your work/life?
(5) What is the personal problem that bothers you the most at the moment?
(1) What would it feel like if these things were gone?
(2) How would you feel if this problem were solved?
(3) If these problems or pains are solved, what are the benefits for you?
(1) What will you do that will make what you can't tolerate now disappear?
(2) What will you do that will solve your problem?
(3) What will make your pain go away?
(4) If what you do doesn't make your dissatisfaction disappear completely, what else will you do?
(5) What will you do to make your problem better solved?
(6) If what method you just didn't work, what other methods would you try to solve your pain/distress/problem?
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- Content Editor: Ivana, Leadership of Thepro
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