Deqing girl Zhang Gong has taken care of her paralyzed mother since she was 12 years old, and for 21 years she has laughed and walked out of the haze to make her life bright again

"Isn't every daughter under the heavens supposed to do this?"

Deqing girl Zhang Gong has taken care of her paralyzed mother since she was 12 years old, and for 21 years she has laughed and walked out of the haze to make her life bright again

"Life kisses me with pain, but I repay it with a song" - in Deqing, Zhejiang, as long as people who are familiar with Zhang Yu will not lightly treat this sentence as "chicken soup".

The reporter had never seen such a smiling person as Zhang Gong, and even suspected that the first greeting she made to the world when she was born was "hahaha".

Talking about the past, the 33-year-old Zhang Gong almost finished with laughter after every happy or sad memory, and even when her eyes were moist, she wiped away tears while the corners of her mouth rose.

Even when she was a child, she suffered a tragic family change, and in the saddest years of junior high school in her life, the teacher's impression of Zhang Yu was "more optimistic than the average child, like to laugh, and smile very brightly."

Her lover Wang Kaili, whom she met in college, also said: "When she was studying, Zhang Yu gave people the impression of being cheerful and smiling, and chatting with her would bring you happiness." ”

"I think my story is very ordinary, isn't every daughter in the world supposed to do this?" Referring to his recent choice as a candidate for the eighth national moral model "filial piety and love for the elderly", Zhang Yu laughed again, "These are all very trivial things in the family."

"We are little loves, it is a matter of natural righteousness in our own family, and we should publicize more about the great love of seeing righteousness and courage and sacrificing ourselves for others." Wang Kaili felt the same way.

However, people are still touched by her "ordinary" story. Perhaps, the daily life of "righteousness" under her own roof can prove a truth: earth-shattering tests are not often there, and whether she can "repeat" the same thing day after day is the big test that more people may experience.

After all, Zhang Yu proves that when fate suddenly throws a happy family into the mud, when a child who has never suffered has to become the pillar of guardianship of her mother, she still has the strength to laugh out of the haze and make life bright again.

"Unlike other children"

Holding his father in the box and sending him to the day of his burial, it was raining, and Zhang Gong did not cry.

"She's only 12 years old and has a great relationship with her dad. I was in the intensive care unit and she had injured her hand. "It was dim and dark outside the window, and a thunderstorm was falling, and Wu Xiaoping, Zhang Gong's mother, was sitting in a wheelchair and reminiscing." She has a very rigid personality, does not shed tears, unlike other children, and generally children have to cry loudly..."

On May 1, 2000, on the May Day holiday before graduating from primary school, the family went out by car, a car accident occurred on the road, his father died, his mother was paraplegic, and Zhang Mo's right arm was crushed and fractured.

In June, Zhang Gong sat in the teacher's office, with his right hand hanging from his chest with a plaster cast, and with his left hand, he completed a special exam and was admitted to a very good middle school with the tenth place in Deqing County.

"At first, I didn't understand, and I didn't understand a lot of things." Zhang Gong said, but she suddenly understood what it means to be cold and warm, and saw some "things that children will not know when there are parents in front."

Luckily, there was a grandmother. Grandma, who was of retirement age and should enjoy her old age in peace, stood in front of Zhang Gong and Wu Xiaoping with a fighting posture, ran to the unit, ran to the relevant departments, gave them a little medical expenses for those who had lost their financial resources, and together with her grandfather, took Wu Xiaoping to Beijing, Shanghai, and Hangzhou to see a doctor.

Zhang Yu drifted in the homes of several relatives for a summer until the beginning of junior high school and lived on campus.

There was a telephone in the hallway of the dormitory, and every night, everyone took the phone card to call home, "I don't have a phone to call." Zhang Yu smiled and remembered that there was a girl in the same class, and every weekend her father came to pick her up and take her home, and she would rush over happily and "hang" on her father.

In the past, Zhang Gong also had a father who spoiled her—a father who would make his children worship.

Zhang Gong said that his father was a college student and continued his studies after work. They had a wall of books in their house, and every summer, her father assigned her homework by reading a chapter of a famous book every day and repeating the contents at night.

Dad also loves life. He often took her up the mountain early in the morning and shouted together at the top of the mountain in the direction of home. After encouraging his daughter to go to school alone for the first time, he would take a picture of his wife watching her daughter's back on the balcony with his camera.

The clip that Zhang Gong recently remembered was the summer day when the air conditioner was installed at home, his father put a large watermelon into the basin to cool down, and the family sat under the air conditioner to divide the watermelon, which was really comfortable.

"Everything is different." She said. Later, the mother finally returned home from the hospital, Zhang Gong resumed day school, and her grandparents moved in with them. Her home was so close to the school that it was only separated by a wall, afraid that Zhang Gong would not eat well in the school canteen, and every day at noon, her grandparents would pass the cooked dishes into the school from outside.

"Daddy's flowers have fallen..."

Wu Xiaoping is in an unstable state, from time to time to be hospitalized, and has been trapped in despair. "For the first few years, I really cried every day. What to do? I can't move, the medical expenses have not been implemented, and my daughter is still so young that she often feels that she can't live anymore, and she has thought about giving her child to someone else. ”

Zhang Gong, who had just entered junior high school, began to learn to take care of her mother. "Grandma said that the most bitter is still the mother, who was originally a healthy and beautiful person, and now he can't even eat and drink water. Mother this state, Grandma is very hard, I can do as much as I can, housework, there is no difficulty. ”

Junior high school classmate Cai Danping once borrowed from Zhang Gong's home, and remembers zhang Gong helping her mother brush her teeth and rinse her mouth, feed her food, massage, wipe herself, and change her diaper every day. "She didn't do any housework in the past, and at first she could only give her grandmother a handle, and slowly start to do it little by little, day after day."

Zhang Gong got up at five or six o'clock every morning, boiled water, and turned over to wipe her mother's body. When I came back from school, I read to my mother and talked about things outside. Wu Xiaoping needs to turn over every two or three hours to sleep, usually relying on her grandmother and changing her on weekends.

Under the double pain of physical and psychological pain, Wu Xiaoping sometimes cried "woe, woe", and sometimes cried and said not to live. "I cried with her too. When you are in a bad mood, you also fight two sentences, saying that you are really gone, and you are relieved that I have become an orphan? Mom was quiet right away! Zhang Gong laughed and recalled.

In school, Zhang Gong is the class leader, with strong organizational skills and a cheerful personality. Zhang Qinying, a Chinese teacher, remembers that from the beginning of the school, Zhang Gong was a smiling child. "If it weren't for her grandmother, we wouldn't have seen anything at all about the changes in her family. The teachers wanted to take care of the child more, but she didn't seem to need it, saying I was okay. ”

In the Language Class, talking about Lin Haiyin's "Old Things in seongnam", the sentence at the end of the article, "Daddy's flowers have fallen, and I am no longer a child" made Zhang Qinying think of Zhang Gong.

In her essay, she wrote about how she took care of her mother. I read this essay in class as a sample essay, and I read it with tears in my eyes. She was also 'Daddy's flowers fell' and grew up all at once. ”

However, suffering can be done in an instant, but growth cannot. Sometimes, Zhang Gong "has a kind of anger in her heart." In the eyes of her friend Cai Danping, Zhang Gong at that time oscillated between understanding and rebellion.

Her grades have regressed, she is not diligent in her studies, she likes to listen to Jay Chou's songs, and she is buried in novels and comics to avoid reality. For a while, she loved to watch Harry Potter, and watched the orphan Harry grow up with the company and encouragement of many people.

She also did some "silly things that I don't want to remember." For example, on a rainy day, run to the rain; in late autumn, pour cold water on the head. Zhang Gong's classmates called me and told me that I went to see her at school, and she was in pain, but she didn't say anything. We thought she did this because it was raining when she sent her father away..." Zhang's grandmother said.

When she lived at Zhang Gong's house, Cai Danping saw Zhang Gong writing every night. "She doesn't tell people, she always giggles and writes it down when she's alone." In fact, she came out of the rebellious period and carried up the responsibilities of the family little by little, so that she became a chapter that cannot be defeated by any difficulties today and has no fear of life. ”

But even in the most rebellious time, Zhang Gong is helping to take care of her mother. In a few years, when Wu Xiaoping was hospitalized, she lived with her grandmother in the hospital to accompany her. She always said to Wu Xiaoping: "You are alive, I at least have my mother, and I have a home." ”

"The one who influenced me the most was my grandmother." Zhang Gong later learned that after the car accident, the doctor had told her grandmother that Wu Xiaoping could live for a maximum of 7 years. Even so, Grandma did not give up and made up her mind to let Her Mother live well. Her kind of strength and dedication made me understand what selfless love is and what responsibility is. Grandma may not care about some things to me, and some feelings are not understood, but you can feel her care and love. ”

Grandma's words and deeds made Zhang Yu understand that no matter what happens, no matter what others say, relatives should rely on each other and never give up.

"You raised me to grow up, I will accompany you to old age"

"It's not that you see something or touch something, you suddenly have an epiphany, you suddenly get better." Talking about how her mother and herself have walked through the emotional trough, Zhang Gong laughed again. "It's a very slow process, trying to get by day by day. Later they asked me, what force supports you to go down? I don't know, it seems to be the accumulation of daily. ”

The car accident has been around for 21 years. Zhang Gong grew into an adult, and the happy background in his personality was always distinct. "I will find a way to make my mother happy and how to live my life well." Don't give up, accumulate happiness in your daily life. ”

Probably in high school, Zhang Gong made a "soup spoon glove" for her mother, fixed the spoon on the strap, and put the strap on the hand, so that Wu Xiaoping could rely on the weak strength of his arm to eat by himself. "Eating it yourself tastes better, people feed it, sometimes I don't know how fast or slow." Wu Xiaoping said.

Zhang Gong also made a bracket with a reflector to facilitate her mother to lie down and watch TV and read books.

Every year on Wu Xiaoping's birthday, Zhang Gong has to buy cakes and gifts. "Celebrate another meaningful year for us!" She laughed and said that life needs a sense of ceremony, "I hope my mother feels these tiny happiness and builds up hope for life bit by bit." ”

"Compared with her peers, my daughter has suffered a lot and is also very strong." Wu Xiaoping said. "She never complains. People with high paraplegia cannot take care of themselves when urinating, they have to squeeze urine, squeeze stool, sometimes the stool cannot be pulled out, and even have to be cut by hand. She went out of her way to do this for me. Sleeping at night, she got up several times to turn me over. For 21 years, I have not had pressure sores, and some people lie down for a few years and have children. ”

"Thinking of my daughter, my heart is very warm. She always wanted me to be happy. Wu Xiaoping smiled softly, "She bought me a smart speaker last time, and she can listen to music and make phone calls with a shout, without the help of others." ”

In 2006, Zhang Yu was admitted to Zhejiang Agriculture and Forestry University. The school is in Hangzhou, and she takes the car back to Deqing every weekend, back to her grandmother and mother.

In her grandmother's eyes, Zhang Gong, who had been smiling all the time, really came out of her sadness after going to college. "Her grades are getting better and better, she is studying harder and harder, she joins the party, often takes scholarships, and comes back with a lot of honorary certificates." We were completely relieved. ”

After that, Zhang Gong was admitted to graduate school, and during graduate school, she met her current lover Wang Kaili.

In 2013, on the eve of her master's degree graduation, Zhang Gong returned to Deqing with her boyfriend. They put on their master's uniforms, pushed up Wu Xiaoping, and asked grandpa and grandma to go out together to take a group photo. These photos are like the preface to a new chapter in Zhang's life.

After graduation, Wang Kaili gave up his plan to go to the big city to develop and came to Deqing with Zhang Gong. Today, they have two lovely sons.

Wu Xiaoping said that he never thought that he could have such a day in his life. "The most difficult difficulty has passed, and now looking at my daughter, son-in-law, and little grandson, I am really happy." The doctor said I live at most 7 years and I have lived for 21 years! If there is no daughter, it is difficult to say whether he would have lived to this day. ”

"You raised me to grow up, and I will accompany you until you grow old." This is what Zhang Gong said to her mother. "No one can imagine the opportunities in life, I told my mother that you should live well and see the excitement of tomorrow." With this said, Zhang Gong once again laughed heartily.

"The child will look at you..."

"I was attracted to Deqing by Zhang Gong. She has such a good personality, we met not easy. "Wang Kaili is a native of Shandong, and before he fell in love with Zhang Gong, his life plan was to go to Beijing to work hard after graduation, or he might stay in Hangzhou, but he didn't expect to come to a small county far from his hometown.

He still remembered the first time he walked into The door of Zhang Gong's house and saw Zhang Gong's mother and grandparents in a wheelchair. "I knew about her family situation and made psychological preparations, but after the real contact, I still didn't expect that the burden on the person I loved would be so heavy." Zhang Yu talked to me at that time, saying that if you don't agree with me, I don't blame you, she has spoken to this extent, then I can't back down, or I still have to work with her to support this family. ”

In Wang Kaili's eyes, in the face of the burden of the family, Zhang Yu did not have a momentary courage, but a wholeheartedness that had remained unchanged for decades. "I have always felt that it is her optimistic and upbeat personality that pushes her forward, not being overwhelmed by difficulties, abandoning herself, or turning her back on her family, and only taking care of herself."

Zhang Gong has a happy little home, and she also asked her mother to take care of her aunt, but she still has to visit her mother almost every day. If the aunt is there, see if there is anyone to help; the aunt is not there, so she stays down and takes care of the mother.

"Our biggest headache is that the babysitter can't pick up, and it happens every year." Wang Kaili said, "The hardest part is Saturday, Sunday, and the New Year's Holiday. The nanny is going home for the New Year, and I am busy at work on weekends, probably working overtime. My wife ran on both sides, took care of her mother, and when she came home, the children also had to make a fuss about finding their mother, she was very tired, she wanted to fall asleep on her head, and she had to coax the children. ”

"She doesn't complain and always shows her happy side on the outside." But Wang Kaili has also seen his wife's vulnerability, seen her cry and say she misses her father.

Last year, Grandma Zhang fell and went to Hangzhou to be hospitalized. Zhang Gong and her uncle took care of her in shifts, working during the day, going to Hangzhou at night to take care of her grandmother, and returning to Deqing to work the next day. Hearing Grandma mention this stubble, she muttered to the side: "Yes! My grandmother..."

Sometimes, Zhang Gong would jokingly say that she was "old, weak, sick and disabled" in the family, but there was joy in suffering. "After suffering, do your best to take responsibility."

Looking back at the road he had traveled, Zhang Yu felt that the changes in his family had made him have a lot of feelings.

She cherishes her home very much and "loves her family and family from the bottom of her heart".

She discovered early on the differences between people, and found that people who had been close to her had different faces after the accident in her home. "In the process of growing up, I also slowly distinguished myself, re-established my cognition, and decided what kind of person I wanted to be."

Such a person certainly knows how to be grateful. "I didn't get here entirely on my own." Zhang Gong said. She is grateful to love her family; grateful to rush home after the accident, recognize her as a daughter, recognize Wu Xiaoping as a sister, and have been concerned about their father's former friends ever since; grateful to the sublimation group that sponsored her tuition and living expenses when she was in college; grateful for the care of many people over the years.

Wang Kaili said: "Over the years, I have experienced it more deeply: accidents may defeat a family, but Zhang Yuan's positive and optimistic personality and attitude will inevitably be able to pull the family out of the haze, and finally it will be kept until the clouds open and the fog disperses." ”

"And she also infected the people around her, and her words and deeds had a profound impact on the two children." Wang Kaili added, "When a child goes to his grandmother's house, he has something to eat for his grandmother first, and he will also learn from his mother to beat his grandmother's legs and knock on his back." Children will look at you, how you treat the elderly, to the family, they will also treat others the way you do. ”

"In two years, I'll be older than my dad." Now, Zhang Gong occasionally dreams that the car accident was fake. When she wakes up, she will be in a trance for half a day. Fate is not fair, but life is not bad, as long as you work hard, there are still good days beckoning ahead.

When she was a child, Zhang Gong once sneaked to the cemetery alone with her mother and her own photos, "At that time, she would say that she hoped her father would come back." Now, it will reassure him that I will take good care of my mother and ask him to bless us. (Reporter Wang Jingxue)

Source: Xinhua Daily Telegraph