I will always miss my father

What is lost will never come back, and the previous experience is always not so profound, but the death of my father made me deeply feel the pain of losing my relatives. Since then I have lost my dearest father, forever the truest and dearest fatherly love. Although it has been nearly twenty years since my father left, the deep nostalgia for my father makes me think of it and I can't help but burst into tears.

Dad, do you know that the little daughter misses you? My father was a tall, strong man, the most magnificent and admired man in my mind, and a powerful pillar of my spiritual world. It was such a healthy father who never got sick, but was accidentally diagnosed with a brain tumor for nearly ten years. The doctor's warning is to operate immediately, and there is no room for delay. For those of us who have never experienced the ups and downs of life, we can't accept it for a while, but we still calmly face this sudden change. The next step is to contact the Second Hospital of Shenyang Medical University, find a specialist, hospitalization, surgery. But often things are not as expected, Dad's surgery is very unsuccessful, postoperative cerebral ascites is serious, the doctor has issued several critical illness notices. At that time, we desperately put down our young and ignorant children, abandoned the tense work at hand, and waited day and night in front of our father's hospital bed. At that time, I did not close my eyes all night, so I kept grabbing my father's hand and praying in my heart that my father could sense the nostalgia of his children and struggle back from the line of death.

Perhaps it was the father who did not give up on the child he loved, or perhaps it was the father's tenacious vitality that conquered the god of death, and after more than a month, the father miraculously woke up. It was only because of the doctor's mistake that the motor nerves were pierced during the seventh puncture of the father, resulting in two-thirds of the body below the chest, which determined that the father's future life was to lie motionless in bed. This was a fatal blow to the strong father, but the open-minded father finally defeated himself and bravely accepted the cruelty of reality.

The father's illness made the mother, who already had atrophied brain, aggravate her illness at once, and she could not take care of herself, let alone take care of her bedridden father. In the face of two elderly people who need to be taken care of, my brother and sister and I took on the heavy responsibility of taking care of our parents, gave up our small family, and did our best to give them the best care. But even so, we still did not save my father's life, and after two years of bedridden, my father still left us.

In fact, we were mentally prepared for my father's death, but when I received a call from my sister and learned that my father had swallowed his last breath, I still couldn't accept it, my heart ached violently, and my legs kept trembling. Why did my father not wait for me, his most beloved little daughter, to close his eyes forever at the last sight of him, and I could not forgive myself for not being with my father at his last moment. This has become an eternal regret in my heart.

The death of my father made me feel that my spiritual world had collapsed, that I had no direction in life, and that I did not know how to face my future life. The loss of my father's solid shoulders made me lose the dependence of my soul. Since then, I have closed my heart and refused to communicate with anyone, and only one person has struggled painfully in the inner world. After taking care of my father's affairs, I fell ill. I can't live without you, Dad, you know? Father was a wise man, and he had long had a premonition of his own death. I remember that it was during his last hospitalization, when I accompanied him to his bed at night, and he called me to his side in a very solemn manner and left his last words. He said that his greatest wealth in this life was to have three excellent children; of the three children, he was the most uneasy about me. Since I was a child, my health was not good, my life ability was poor, and he was afraid that I would not be able to take good care of myself; he also instructed the three sisters to unite with each other at all times and be humble to each other; and finally to do their best to take good care of their mother together. We have taken our father's words to heart and have always followed them to do the best. Whenever I encounter setbacks and lose confidence in life, I think of my father's dying words and warn myself to live happily, so that my father in another world can really rest assured.

After a long period of painful struggle, I finally understood that since I had lost the strong backing of my father, I had to bear all the hardships in life independently and change my mentality to face it bravely. The weak little daughter in your mind has become much stronger, has come out of the haze of emotion, can handle the contradictions in life alone, and can laugh at life. Dad, did you hear me?

My father was a materialist, and his views also deeply influenced us. But ever since my father left me, I'd rather believe that Heaven knows. I believe that God will let me meet my father in my dreams and miss my father day and night, so as to dispel the regret in my heart. Probably the hearts of father and daughter are connected, and one day I actually met my father in a dream. I remember my father just hurriedly saying to me, "I'm cold." "It's gone. That time I believed the folk dream saying that someone had made him a set of clothes and burned them in front of his father's grave. Kneeling in front of my father's grave, my heart was like overturning a five-flavor bottle, and a small dirt bag separated me from my beloved father in two worlds. It is said that a good man has a peaceful life, and his father has been loyal and upright all his life, so why did God unfairly take his life prematurely? He toiled all his life for us, and left before we could fulfill our filial piety as children. Now the only thing I can do for my father is to pray to the heavens for him to live happily in heaven. I always believed that My Father was watching us from heaven. The kind father will surely bless us with peace and happiness in his special way. Dad, did you see that?

What I lost will never come back, and I deeply felt it at the moment I lost my father. The tree wants to be quiet and the wind is not stopping, and the son wants to raise and not to be kissed. People who have the love of their parents, often go home and see.