Any kind of relationship is fragile.
At the beginning, we all thought that as long as we cherished fate desperately, we could last forever. Later, I learned that all the troubled relationships were not suitable for me.
No matter how two people run into each other, they will not be compatible, but like a pair of shoes that do not fit, the longer they run in, the more painful it is.
Yishu once said: "True love makes people happy, if you feel pain, it must be a mistake and need to end in time." ”
Whether it is love, friendship, or family affection, we must gather and disperse with fate. You don't have to wait until you lose both before you cry and let go.
To understand, no matter how good the relationship is, if there are the following 4 feelings, most of them are fate will be exhausted, and you need to wake up in time.
01
Skepticism: No matter what the other person says or does, you won't trust.
A story is recorded in the Liezi: someone lost an axe, suspecting that the neighbor's son stole it, but no conclusive evidence could be found.
Looking at the neighbor's son, walking like a thief, looking like a "reasonable loss" look, talking is also related to stealing an axe, no matter from which angle to observe, it is worthy of doubt.
Soon, the axe was found in the mountains.
Looking at the neighbor's son, there is no problem with the action ecology.
Ma Yun once said: "Your biggest risk is the lack of our trust in you." ”
When a person is not trusted, no matter how much you please others, it will be annoying. The good you give to others has become a reason for others to bully you at will.
When you don't trust others, you will take the initiative to alienate him, even if he chases you and talks, he feels that it is the "wind in your ears". You are becoming more and more disappointed in him.
A good relationship must be unconditionally trusted. Losing trust, or adding a lot of strings attached to trust, means that the relationship is unreliable.
02
Feeling of depression: When two people are together, there is a suffocating atmosphere.
Zhou Guoping said: "A good partnership should be a heart of trust, not restricting each other's freedom, and cherishing the heart not to abuse their own freedom." ”
It is really not necessary, through feelings, to control the freedom of others.
For example, many couples, accustomed to the life of "not leaving the mother-in-law and the scales" as long as it is a separate time, they must report the situation clearly, if not, they must do everything possible to find out the situation clearly.
Losing the distance between people is a disaster.
When the sense of depression becomes stronger and stronger, it proves that two people are together, and it is not appropriate. It's like a very beautiful dress, the style is good, but it doesn't fit well, but it's not willing to throw it away. As long as you wear this dress to go out, you will be very awkward, in case you are too fat and break your clothes, you will have no place to look at yourself.
03
Sense of crisis: Feelings can't find direction, and there is no way.
Some netizens told me about a troublesome thing.
She and her boyfriend spent three months together and cared about each other.
However, they still care about things before they fell in love. The boyfriend and the ex-girlfriend were in love for eight years; she was in love with the ex for six years. The scenes of the past come to mind from time to time, and the feelings of the moment are stirred up.
The hardest thing to accept is that after the boyfriend is drunk, he has to call and text his ex-girlfriend. He said that in this life, there will never be a girl who makes him so moved.
When the wine woke up, he immediately changed his attitude and said that the choice in front of him was the best.
The uncertain emotions are very embarrassing.
In real life, there are always some emotions, and I don't know where to go. Continue to develop, whether it can become better, no one is sure, decisively let go, and can not do, there is still some room to retain.
When the sense of crisis is getting stronger and stronger, you may wake up in the middle of the night. When two people get along, there will be a feeling of inadequacy.
When is he leaving? Is it that in a few years, the relationship will get better? There are too many uncertain factors that toss people enough.
In fact, good relationships are all secure, and as long as they are together, they are very solid. If you are always afraid of the end of the day, it is better to let go as soon as possible and go alone.
04
Fatigue: Life is in trouble and there is no idea of tossing and turning.
When Ni Ping was fifty-five years old, she was a guest on the "Super Visit" program. She said with emotion that if there is a next life, she will not want a father, a child, nor a family.
Ni Ping, who has a successful career, has experienced 4 love periods; when she was a child, her parents' feelings were not good, and the family was often noisy, and then her parents divorced, and she lived with her mother; when she was in her forties, she got married and had children, but her son was not very healthy. Fortunately, after a big circle, she still chose love and cast happiness for the rest of her life.
A person's life, decades only, how many days can be tossed?
We often say that the more you toss, the better. In fact, it is not like this, the occasional toss will bring freshness, but repeated tossing, can not see the effect, will bring a tiredness.
Being with anyone and getting tireder and tireder shows that the relationship has become a burden and needs to be given up. People can't always lose themselves because of anyone.
05
Conclusion.
Writer Zhang Fangyu wrote in "Insights in Isolation": "Interpersonal communication is like sitting around a fire to keep warm, but it will also be burned by the sudden splash of Mars from time to time." ”
Occasional injuries are understandable, and as long as they are tolerated by each other, the wounds will heal. But a huge injury, even if the wound heals, will leave an ugly scar. Later, when you see the scars, you will faintly feel pain.
Meeting someone who cherishes you may be too close to each other, creating contradictions, but it doesn't matter, relying on each other for more time to keep warm than being burned by Mars; meeting a person who makes you miserable is undoubtedly a moth to the fire.
Whether a relationship is good or not is often "only understood, not expressed". When you calm down and slowly understand, you will understand, judge whether two people are suitable, do not look at money, do not listen to rhetoric, but - less laborious, very comfortable to get along with.
People who are doomed to have no chance of life, then turn around as soon as possible and meet the person who holds the end of the world.
Author: Cloth coarse food.
Follow my words and go into your heart.
The illustrations in this article come from the Internet.