As we all know, Cao Cao is a generation of tyrants, although he has power and status, but he still can't resist the temptation of female color, the poem "The East Wind does not cooperate with Zhou Lang Ben, and the Copper Bird Spring Deep Lock Erqiao." "It is written that Cao Cao covets Big Qiao and Little Qiao. However, like it, Cao Cao is still extremely principled in choosing his wife's room.
The woman who can be officially made a lady by Cao Cao must have her otherworldly side.
Mrs. Ding is one of them.
She devoted herself to raising a son and a daughter left by Cao Cao's deceased wife, Lady Liu, as her own, and never heard the slightest news of abuse. Mrs. Ding not only fulfilled the obligations of a mother in terms of food, clothing, shelter and transportation, but also established correct values for Cao Ang's brothers and sisters in ideological education and in the development of morality, intellect, and physical beauty, which is extremely rare.
The Battle of Wancheng led to Cao Cao's unexpected defeat, and this tragic defeat caused Cao Cao to lose too much, including: the general Dianwei and the beloved son Cao Ang. Cao Ang sacrificed his life for his father at the most critical moment, and Cao Cao had pain in his heart but could not express it. After all, as a military expert, laws and regulations are the most important, and as a politician, political stability is the most important.
Therefore, Cao Cao could not show the slightest pain of losing his son in front of everyone, and he could only express to everyone the sorrow of losing his love.
However, the woman could not understand the politician's far-sightedness, and Lady Ding could not accept Cao Cao's cold-blooded character. She was deeply distressed by Cao Ang's death in battle, washing her face with tears day and night, and reprimanding and complaining about Cao Cao's actions all day long. At first, Cao Cao also fell into the vortex of self-blame and guilt, but over time, Cao Cao's rationality eventually outweighed his sensibility.
In order not to let Lady Ding's emotions affect him, he arranged for Lady Ding to return to her mother's house, Cao Cao's purpose was just to make Lady Ding calm and calm, and it might be better to change the environment. However, Cao Cao was wrong, and when Cao Cao went to pick up Lady Ding, Lady Ding seemed to know Cao Cao as if she did not know Cao Cao, and just bowed her head and knitted her own cloth.
Cao Cao went forward to persuade Lady Ding to go home, and said a lot of soft words, but to no avail. In desperation, Cao Cao had to get up and walk out of the door, and reluctantly asked Lady Ding, but still did not get a response. Cao Cao had no choice but to abandon Lady Ding, cut her off, and promote Bian to the position of wife. In fact, in Cao Cao's heart, he was still unwilling to give up on Lady Ding, but he was incompetent and powerless.
Mrs. Bian is also an otherworldly woman, and unlike Mrs. Ding, she understands the overall situation, takes care of the general situation, and understands politics. Although Mrs. Bian's family origin is not superior, she always cherishes the world's social welfare and the people of Li, and always upholds the spirit of being humble and not daring to forget the worries of the country, and shows extraordinary temperament and world view.
Once, Cao Cao disguised himself as an emissary for refuge and could not return home for a long time, and when Yuan Shu knew about it, he sent someone to send a message to Lady Bian: "Cao Cao may be dead." Hearing this news, Cao Cao's advisers and cronies all panicked and looked for a home for themselves, but Lady Bian did not panic in the slightest.
As a weak woman, she stopped everyone in time, and also sonorously refuted the rumor that Cao Cao was dead, and, using the radical method, said: "Even if Cao Cao is dead, everyone will just walk away, is it worthy of Cao Cao?" The crowd couldn't help but bow their heads, and a few days later, Cao Cao returned safely and was very admired when he learned of what Lady Bian had done.
In addition, Mrs. Bian has another point worth learning from the world, that is, her modesty and low profile.
When her own son Cao Pi was made crown prince, everyone suggested that she be invited to the hospital with great fanfare and give everyone a reward. However, Lady Bian calmly analyzed the situation, and she believed that the reason why Cao Pi was made crown prince was because he was the oldest among his brothers, and Cao Pi did not have any characteristics of being a leader, which was a dereliction of duty as a mother, so Cao Pi was made crown prince, and there was nothing to show off.
At that time, the two brothers Cao Pi and Cao Zhi made a lot of trouble in order to seize the throne and form gangs. Both of these brothers were the biological sons of Lady Bian, and the Bian clan was particularly fond of Cao Zhi, and although she was impatient, she was never involved in the political struggle between the two sons. Because, she understood, she did not have any great political acumen, and all she could do was to ease the contradictions between her sons as much as possible, and it was impossible to mix them.
Lady Bian knows the etiquette very well and respectfully obeys the etiquette of filial piety and benevolence.
When she ascended to the throne, she not only raised all of Cao Cao's children, but also a tolerant and benevolent mother, and all her children were a bowl of water. In addition, Lady Bian has always remembered Lady Ding in her heart, and whenever Cao Cao is away on business, she will arrange for someone to send some precious supplements to Lady Ding, and will also invite Ding to her home to chat and reminisce about the past.
In addition to her benevolent heart, Mrs. Bian also maintains a thrifty and frugal lifestyle. She never pays too much attention to her dress and dress, everything is the simplest and simplest, even the furniture in the house is only painted black.
Moreover, for the mother's family, Mrs. Bian is even more strict. She restrained the words and deeds of her relatives everywhere, and repeatedly instructed her mother's family: "In the outside world, we must follow the rules, divide things in peace, do not become flying because of ourselves, and do not fantasize about getting unnecessary cents from ourselves." ”
Mrs. Bian also warned that if it was her own family members who committed adultery, she would not only not intercede for it, but would also add another degree to the crime. When Mrs. Bian invited her mother's family as a guest, she never prepared any mountain treasures and seafood; when she ate with her closest subordinates, she never prepared meat. This is not Lady Bian's miserliness and oppression, but the diligence and thrift of others pushed by herself.
Once, Cao Cao got a few precious jade pendants, so he asked Lady Bian to choose one, and Lady Bian didn't even think about it, so she chose a medium one. Cao Cao asked why, and Lady Bian replied meaningfully, she said: "Saying that the superior is greedy, the inferior is contrived, and the middle way is the best." ”
For ordinary people, Mrs. Bian threw away all harsh rules and was able to take compassionate care of all the people. Every time she traveled with the army and saw an old man on the side of the road, she stopped the car, inquired about her health, and did not hesitate to hand out the necessary items. It wasn't a show, but because when she saw these old people, she thought of her late grandmother.
Mrs. Bian's parents lost their lives precisely because they did not get the most basic living security, and whenever they think of this, Mrs. Bian is very sad. Mrs. Ding and Mrs. Bian have many differences in personality and temperament, but they are all honest and selfless women of true temperament, as the women behind Cao Cao, they are gentle and kind, and everything they pay should be passed on by the world.
Resources:
[Romance of the Three Kingdoms, Wei Shu, Emperor Wuji I, Biography of Wei Shu Houfei, Empress Bian