November 23, 19:20, what kind of life and death parting, two lives apart?
Thinking of you two, my heart is still like a pinprick, the more I think about you two, the deeper the needle is, but the figure and voice of both of you still gush out from the bottom of my heart, I can't control it.
I seemed to see Migo looking at me with round eyes, as if I heard the rice grain meowing at me, and my tears flowed down again. Rice fruits, rice grains, you will not blame me, will not hate me for ruining your healthy life, right?
Your brother brought you home when you were only the size of a palm, and he liked you very much, holding you both from time to time and teasing you. But I didn't dare to see you two, for fear that after a look, I would not be able to take you both in, and I did not dare to take you both in, because when I was a child, I watched the big flower cat at home, mistakenly ate the poisonous rat and struggled to die, and the pain of the liver and intestines made me palpitate. But your brother liked you both and gave you names: the little yellow-orange-orange male cat called Migo; the black-and-white little female cat called Rice Grain. My brother won't take care of you two, so I'll just be a mother cat and hold you both in my arms, and the whole world is quiet and soft. How pitiful it is that you have a few little paws in my arms and keep stepping on your, leaving your mother at such a young age! I spoke softly to you both and watched you both fall asleep in my arms, snoring and snoring, with a thin beard motionless.
You two can't drink water yet, I pour warm water in the palm of my hand to feed you both, the grains of rice are very well-behaved, bowed their heads, meowing, little tongue licking and drinking; rice fruit still has to urge you a few times, you drink some, and then walk away. Later, I bought a pacifier for babies, bought goat's milk to feed you one by one like a little baby, the pacifier is down, but I am afraid of choking you two, how many times didn't you two choke? I'll stop, pick you up, gently pat you on the back, and say "I'm sorry."
The two of you start chasing, playing, playing with each other, crawling onto the couch, sometimes licking your paws and washing your face, sometimes huddled together to comb each other's fluff, and sometimes sleeping together. As I walk past you, Migo will gently open and close my eyes. Remember when you two slept in a wooden barrel, huddled together like a yin and yang fish?
One day, I was surprised to find that you two were able to jump on the couch and the chase was faster. Later, you can easily jump to the table, when eating, you will invariably jump up, arch the triangle nose, smell here, sniff there, tear down a little ham for the rice fruit, he sniffs and eats, and the rice grain also likes to eat the crumbs of the dried steamed buns. When you see me eating, you will rush to me, meow like a game, I put the food in front of you, you two smell, walk away, is it strange that you can't eat? You eat apples, and the little thorns on your tongue lick and eat a small piece of apple; the grains of rice don't like to eat apples.
Later, you gradually became picky eaters, whether it was mountain treasures or seafood on the dinner table, you just sniffed your nose, your beard was trembling, there was no interest, you only liked to eat cat food, cat canned food.
The two of you hung a bouncy little shuttlecock on the beam, I shook it, and Migo pounced like a warrior, hiding behind his shoes, leaning over, shaking his ass, wagging his tail, and then rushing over, biting and scratching, and when he got tired of playing, he would lie on the floor and grab the shuttlecock consciously or unconsciously, as if he was just playing like this to please me. The rice nuts do not let the rice grains, and the rice grains always go to play with the shuttlecocks after the rice nuts have finished playing. Rice grain is really a female cat, especially like the thread, I sew a quilt, most of the time is to avoid you chasing that thread, your perseverance, I only have a bitter smile. I take pictures of you and bask in my happiness; I snap up cat food for you both to make you both happy. I have both of you in my laughter.
You two grow up happily and carefreely, your cries are getting louder and louder, your hair is getting shinier, I don't worry about you becoming fat cats, why don't you enjoy your life? Under my doting, you jumped on the cabinet air conditioner, ran to the big closet, slipped into the shoes, the quilt; the leisurely walk on the coffee table, the blatant lying on the TV cabinet. In your room, I have equipped you with cat litter, cat mountain, a plate for drinking water, and a small bottle cap for eating, which is your territory. But of course you two are not satisfied, occupying the living room, seizing the bedroom, inspecting the balcony, and sneaking into the kitchen from time to time. At night, you two go to sleep, one at the head of my bed, one at the end of the bed, and sometimes you both lie on my quilt, and while I am relieved, I dare not turn over and wake you up.
I will carefully trim your nails while you two are sleeping quietly, you two know? How many times have you inadvertently slipped out of my arms and around me and let me get the "rabies vaccine"? You don't know, I can't count, but after the injection came back, you two brushed together and stood at my feet, meowing, ignoring you, you two will climb up like climbing trees, I had to crouch down to pick you up, coax you, the pain of the injection has long been forgotten, and there is no idea of resenting you both.
For the health of both of you, every year I have to run to the best pet hospital for you to get a preventive injection. Every time you two are invited to go to the bag, it is so laborious, you two always do not cooperate with me, And Migo is even more timid, hoarse meow. After that injection, the rice grains were crying all night, and the rice nuts were powerless to lie there, you two must be very uncomfortable, right? But that's so you two don't get sick. Every six months, you still have to remove insects for you both on time, and you two don't like it, right? You're growing up, and I have to put my heart down again and operate on you both. After the operation, Migo just didn't move, didn't eat or drink. But grain of rice, you are guilty, your cry all night tugged at my heart, holding your weak body, you trembled into a mess, my heart hurt badly, the blood stains under your stomach made me dizzy, one night I hugged you, comforted you, prayed not to be a female cat in the next life, right? You gently licked my fingers and meowed... Growing up is always so hard, right?
Rice grains are often lying alone on the windowsill looking at the small garden under the window, are they looking at the leaves, or listening to the birds? Migo was still asleep. Sometimes Migo will bully the rice grain with her wide waist, and I myself will reprimand Miguo for "not bullying girls, she is your companion." At night the grain of rice is willing to go to the door to see, just in front of me to bark, pitiful shouting, I stand up, you will sneak to the door, see me sit down again, you come to call me again, even in front of me to roll up and coddle up, so I hold you, one hand to support your two cool hind paws, one hand around your front paws, open a door slit, you meow out of the laughing head, triangular ears erect, gather small noses to smell. Migo you still remember that time, you took advantage of my attention to the opportunity of the rice grain to open the door, quietly slipped out, I did not know, before going to bed I could not find you, all over the house to find, everywhere called you, I was scared, ran to the corridor to find, fortunately the corridor door is closed, or you run out how to ah? There is no basement, I had to go upstairs to find, you actually came out of the corridor handrail on the third floor, probing your head to look at me, white nose, like a mischievous child, more than half an hour of wandering, are you very proud? I hold you and blame you, how can you make me worry?
Migo, you always meow at my door in the morning, or at the kitchen door, I know you are hungry cat canned again, you are really hungry cat. But you can't eat it, and the grains of rice know that the two front paws press the small plate and eat the canned food slowly. You, arched like a pig, the small plate pushed forward by itself, and I had to help you hold it, so that you could eat at ease.
Will I accompany you both, or will you both accompany me? I am not at ease when I go out, I am always worried that you two will not eat well, drink well, and lack of companionship is not unhappy, that long line of concern is the well-behaved of the two of you, or the dependence on me?
The years are quiet, you two are the joy of my life, back home, too late to take off the shoes and clothes, I will first hug you, miguo man does not like me to hug, millet grain is obedient often take the initiative to lean back and call me, I laugh at you up, you twist your ass, reclining in the crook of my arm, leaning back or hooking your head.
I always thought we could spend our whole lives together, at least I would let you both spend your old age quietly...
But I don't know why I had an eye disease, redness, swelling and itching, so I had to take a leave of absence and go to the hospital to buy a lot of medicines. I didn't want to believe it when I heard that it was the cause of the infection on both of you, but I closed the bedroom door and didn't dare let you run to my bed again. Do you blame me for ignoring you both? But you know what? For the sake of you two, I hid from my relatives, and even quarreled with them, you two are my life, how can I be willing to let you both leave?
The eyes have been sick for 2 months, more serious, the red and swollen eye sockets have squeezed the eyes into a line, I am scared, even I can't take care of myself, how to take care of you both? I've thought of many, many ways to find a new owner for both of you who loves you. I don't want you two to go to the countryside to go free-range, you don't have the ability to take care of yourself? How did you get that environment? I dare not let you go to the community to become a homeless stray cat. I called the pet shop and the owner was very loving and promised me to adopt you both and see if there were any new owners who claimed you both.
I was crying and sending you both over, and along the way I kept talking to you both, and you two meowed worriedly, and that scream tore at my heart. After letting go of you two, how can my heart be put down? In that environment, there was no place to stretch out, a black hole hole, I took a few photos with tears in my eyes, and ran back. The thought of you two is like hearing your two cries, and my heart trembles.
……
You two left, and I cleaned up thoroughly and disinfected it with 84.
But the next day I can't stand it, drive to see you two, the pet shop owner called and said, Migo ran to the storage room, how to call can not come out, want me to go to pick up Miguo down, others dare not ah. When I got there, I cried: Migo's hair was hunched over, his eyes were unfocused, he was overly frightened, and I picked him up so easily, Migo cried. Rice grains are sieve-like chaff and shiver non-stop. The boss said that such a domestic cat is too timid, two days and one night are dripping water, no one wants to adopt...
I took you both home again, and Migo was a little skinny, lying on the floor motionless, as if still frightened, and after half a day, I fed you two canned cats, afraid to feed you too much, for fear that you would vomit again.
Looking at you two, I regret myself - let you two suffer this sin in vain, pick up the rice fruit, much lighter, not as round as before, the rice grain is even weaker. I hope that you two will quickly become active and recover. I was lucky enough to think that we could still be together, rice and rice grains, you both hid in the high closet, terrified, is it because you don't trust me?
I couldn't help but go to work, and on weekends I hid in another house, hoping my eyes would be good so we wouldn't be apart.
Sure enough, after two days of rest, not with you two, my eyes returned to normal, and I was glad that everything could go back to before.
But after only coming back for one night with you, my eyes were gone again. I was desperate, my eyes were not angry, how could it not be like this before? I thought about thousands of roads, each one is not OK, release you two, how do you live, this big winter does not even have a warm place, what do you two eat? Where is there clean water to drink? Will other cats bully you? You seem to have no other way but to die of illness!!! The doctor at the pet shop also said that you two have no ability to survive and will not prey on your own, rice grain rice, meet me is your luck, or unfortunate? Did my doting make you both happy, or did it hurt both of you?
I cried and wrote a note to the doctor, telling me about my pain, the doctor was helpless, and finally agreed to my request for "comfort" for the two of you, do you both know that when I made this decision, I was cold?
In the evening, you were caught again, put in the bag, rice grains, do you know that this is the last mileage, you desperately broke through the lock of the bag, ran out, I had to catch you again, stuffed you into the bag, my heart was broken.
Along the way, I talked to you two and added some courage to myself, and you two whimpered and screamed, which made me feel bad.
The medical staff is also very sorry, the voice is soft, after signing, my eyes are full of tears, I look at the two of you in the two bags, how to block the tears can not be blocked...
The rice grain went first, miko was wailing, and I whispered to you with tears, "A needle, it's good... Whew..." Through the crack in the door, I saw the grain of rice lying quietly and softly on the operating table, motionless. It is said that you can see things that humans can't see, grains of rice, what do you see? What are you waiting for?
Migo was also sent in, I hid aside, in addition to crying or crying, crying you two crying yourself, I heard Migo's constant cries, anesthesia needle hurt you? For a long, long time, I can't hear your voice, the world is quiet, I can't hear the meow of the rice grains anymore, I can't hear the sound of rice grinding cat's claws anymore, I can't hear the sound of you two chasing and frolicking anymore. The medical staff solemnly wrapped a white blanket for you two, gently put it into a cardboard box, I took this heavy box, how many days and nights, four years, we have not been away from each other. Migo, you called at my door so many times that night, I ignored you, are you very aggrieved?
On the way back, I cried loudly, you can not be sinned, you are also healthy and healthy in the other world, you are not sick in this world, rice grains and rice, you don't blame me...
I found a quiet park, Migo timid, the car on the side of the road will not scare him, gently lift you two out of the box, I cried and could not see the ground, first the grain of rice, the soft body did not have any breath, gently put you into the deep hole, and then the rice fruit, once the weight of the hand, now so fragile, put you next to the rice grain, I let you two head touch together, one of the small front paws of the rice grain wrapped around the rice grain, just like you two slept soundly on the sofa, on the quilt, You two are together in another world, and you are buried under those cypresses, where there is shade and summer and it is not hot.
Fill in the soil, I will pile the soil solid, can not let others disturb your sleep, you two know?
Now you two can not be troubled by the disease, not suffering from the environment, not being bullied by others, you two can chase and play together in another world, I think the rice grain will not be alone, the rice fruit will not be lonely, you two will think of me in that world? Will you wait for me?
Rice fruit, rice grain, the world over there is not cold, I regret not laying a quilt for you two, rice grain, you have to protect the rice fruit, his timidity; rice fruit you want to grow up, help the rice grain; I also want to be good, or what is the point of your departure?
You two are gone, my world is empty, I dare not open your memories... I left your two health books, and finally wrote down my thoughts about you both in your different books, and the tears dripped on them, wiped away the tears, and continued to talk to you both, can you hear? Can you understand it? Grain of rice, you often lie in my arms when I read a book, lying on the book, you can tell the rice fruit when you understand it!
O generous and benevolent Mother Earth, may you bless the soul of the rice grain and rice nuts; time, can you really alleviate the concentration of sorrow?