Past experiences, especially childhood experiences, determine our lives.
This is the classic theory of psychological trauma, and the creator is Freud, the founder of the famous psychoanalytic psychology. Trauma theory is still a widely used method by counselors. According to Freud's theory, past injuries to people's minds (psychological trauma) are the culprits of their present misfortunes.
But Adler's Philosophical Lesson in The Hated Courage: The Father of Self-Enlightenment says that Freud's determinism is wrong!
This is the untold Adler personal psychology with teleology at its core.
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" data-track="8" >-1-Why is Freud's determinism wrong? </h1>
The Courage to Be Hated says that people are not swayed by past causes.
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" data-track="10" > the "world" itself is simple, and it is completely "you" who see the world as complex. </h1>
For example, the temperature of well water is constant, about 18 degrees for many years, but the feeling of drinking in summer and winter is very different, feeling cool in summer and feeling warm in winter. The cold and warm of well water is an undeniable fact, but cold and warm are subjective feelings given by people.
The past, like the temperature of well water, is an objective fact, and if you look at it with sunglasses, the world you see will naturally become darker and more complex.
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" data-track="13" > determinism is immutable. </h1>
"Determinism" holds that your present and even your future are all determined by things in the past, so blindly focusing on the causes of the past, and explaining things only by reasons, you will eventually come to the conclusion that the present and the future cannot be changed at all.
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" data-track="15" > psychological trauma does not exist. </h1>
Determinism holds that past psychological trauma determines who you are now. When you are not actually suffering because of the stimuli of your own experiences— so-called psychological trauma. In fact, it is not the past experience that determines oneself, but the meaning that you yourself give to the experience —"I think it is psychological trauma".
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" data-track="17" > anger is fabricated. </h1>
Determinism holds that "man cannot resist feelings" and that anger comes from the helpless force majeure of the heart. But anger is really just a "means" that can be put away and collected. It's like a mother who is angry with her daughter, when she receives a call from the teacher, she immediately retracts her anger and talks to the teacher in a harmonious voice. So anger can be cleverly retracted the moment the phone is answered, or it can be released again after hanging up the phone. People are not angry because they are angry, but they use (fabricate) the feeling of anger for their own purposes (such as deterring their daughters).
"Determinism" is, in the final analysis, a "theory of causes", which gives an excuse to the present, but it does not solve the problem at all. If we keep relying on causality, we will never stop moving forward.
Just like if you go to the doctor for a cold or fever, the doctor tells you that the reason is "I went out yesterday and dressed too thinly, so it's not your fault." But what you care about is not the cause, but how to heal!
The method of telling you the cure is the teleology of Adler's philosophy.
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" data-track="22" >-2-What is Adler's teleology? </h1>
"The Courage to Be Hated" says that people are not dominated by feelings or the past, but move towards the goals they have set, which is teleology.
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" data-track="24" > unfortunately chosen by yourself. </h1>
You choose "misfortune" at some point in your life. This is neither because you were born in an unhappy situation nor because you were in an unhappy situation, but because you think that "unhappiness" is a "good" for yourself.
In Greek, the word "good" does not contain a moral meaning, but only a meaning of "good"; on the other hand, the word "evil" also has a meaning of "no good".
You chose misfortune because it will make you feel like a victim and can constantly gain the sympathy of others like Xianglin Sister-in-law.
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" data-track="28" > does not change is also a person's determination not to change. </h1>
People can change at any time and in whatever environment they are in. The reason why you can't change is because you have made up your mind not to change. Why? That's because not changing, despite some inconvenience and freedom, you still feel that the way you live now is better, and it is easier and more reassuring not to change than to change.
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" data-track="30" > teleology determines your happiness. </h1>
If your purpose is to be happy, you can gain the courage to change, that is, the courage to be happy, and try to choose to make changes. "Man can change at any time" is the first premise of Adler's philosophy.
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" data-track="32" >-3-How to be happy through change</h1>
"The Courage to Be Hated" says that in order to change oneself to achieve happiness, one should abandon one's self-excuse of not changing and live in the present moment.
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" data-track="34" > the assumption of "what if" is an excuse for you not to change. </h1>
For example, if someone wants to be a writer, he always excuses "If I had time, if I had money, I would write good works". In fact, he just wants to retain a possibility of "if I can do it" by not going to the competition, that is, he does not want to go out and be evaluated, and he is not willing to face the reality of losing the election due to the poor work. He just wants to live in the possibility of "I can write as long as I have time, I can write as long as the environment has it, and I have this talent myself." Maybe in another 5 or 10 years, he'll start using excuses like "no longer young" or "already have a family."
Abandoning such an excuse is to write if it fails, and to change it even if the dream is shattered. Because only by doing it can you know if you can change, even if you fail, it is nothing, just continue to change.
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" data-track="37" > happiness is to live in the here and now. </h1>
Adler's philosophy holds that whatever happened in previous lives has no impact on how you will live your life in the future. It is you who decide your life to live "at this moment". If you have the courage to change, you have the possibility of happiness in the future.
People are not machines that run automatically once they are set up, but a life that can change at any time and take the initiative to be happy;
Life is not a fixed script with a single law of cause and effect and a doomed only ending, but an infinite game full of possibilities and bursts of multiple wonderful things.
And all this only requires you to take off the sunglasses of determinism, find the purpose of your life, and change yourself with the courage of happiness.