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My name is Xiaoling, I am Chinese New Year's Eve years old, I live in a bustling city, and I work in the financial industry on weekdays. As a typical urban woman, I was independent, but I missed out on a lot of opportunities for my personal life because of my busy work. My parents were always worried about my marriage, and at their urging, I finally accepted the blind date they arranged.
That day, I came to the café where I had agreed with mixed feelings. After meeting the other person, I felt decent about his appearance. His name was Wang Qiang, he was well-dressed and had a polite smile on his face. We exchanged pleasantries briefly, and then we got to know each other.
Wang Qiang claims to be an engineer with a stable job and a well-off family. He looks confident when he talks about his work and life. He also mentioned that he likes fitness and traveling, and I was not very interested in his topic, but responded politely. However, what puzzled me was that his description of his work and life seemed a little too boastful.
During the conversation, I found that although Wang Qiang's speech and demeanor were friendly, he always avoided the important and trivialized my questions. He only asked me a word or two about my work and interests, and my knowledge of him was limited to a few introductions about himself. I began to have some bad premonitions about this blind date.
After chatting for about half an hour, Wang Qiang suddenly said, "Xiaoling, I have prepared a gift for you, I hope you will like it." He took a small box out of his bag and handed it to me.
I was a little surprised at first, looking forward to what kind of gift it would be. But when I opened the box, I found that it was an ordinary apple. I was stunned for a moment, not knowing what his intention was in giving this gift. Wang Qiang saw my expression and explained, "Apples are a symbol of health and peace. I think it makes sense to give you this gift. ”
I tried to respond politely: "Thank you for the gift, but it was a bit of a surprise to me." Wang Qiang looked a little proud: "Haha, isn't it special?
I was a little disappointed that he seemed to be a little stingy with this gift. What's more, his attitude towards me made me feel insincere. I didn't want to be disappointed right away, so I decided to keep chatting with him and see if I could find something interesting.
However, in the following conversations, I found that Wang Qiang's topic gradually became monotonous and boring. He talked about his accomplishments in his work and the little things in his daily life, and he didn't show any interest in me at all. The blind date process was boring for me, and I began to realize that this blind date might not end well.
Just when I was thinking about how to end this blind date, Wang Qiang suddenly mentioned that he had a pet dog at home. He took out his phone and showed me some pictures of the dogs. Although I am a pet lover, it wasn't enough to make a big difference in my interest in him.
Wang Qiang gushed about the interesting things he had with his pet dog, and he seemed to like his dog very much, which made me feel a little bit good about him. However, as the conversation continued, I found that he was more of a self-aggrandizing and didn't care about my reaction.
"Do you like pets, too?" he asked me suddenly.
"I like dogs, but I'm too busy with work to keep them for now. I responded.
"Well, it's right to be busy, women should have their own careers!" he said thoughtfully.
"Yes, everyone has their own rhythm of life. "I answered tentatively, hoping to lead the conversation.
However, Wang Qiang quickly changed the topic and began to talk about his family background. He talks about his siblings in the family and how he has taken on some of the responsibilities at home. I noticed that there was a sense of superiority in his words, which made me feel a little uncomfortable.
"Do you have any plans at home?" Wang Qiang asked me.
"My parents are very traditional and hope that I can get married and have children as soon as possible. I replied.
"This is also normal, after all, at our age, our parents will definitely urge it. Wang Qiang nodded.
"Yes, they often say I'm too picky. I jokingly responded.
Wang Qiang smiled: "It's not a bad thing, it's better to be picky than casual." Your parents will definitely want you to find a good fit. ”
"Yes, but you can't force it. I said with a smile.
Wang Qiang then began to talk about his views on marriage and family. He mentioned that he hopes that his future partner can support his career and be able to understand his working hours. He also emphasized the harmony between family members.
"I think family is one of the most important parts of life, after all, it is the harbor of our souls. Wang Qiang said.
"I agree that family is really important. I nodded in agreement.
However, I don't fully agree with him in my heart. He seemed to have high expectations for his future partner, but didn't really understand my thoughts and expectations. I began to wonder if he really cared about my feelings.
Wang Qiang continued to talk about his ideal family, and I listened patiently. He talked about wanting the other person to take on more housework at home so that he could focus on his career. When I heard this, I felt a sense of dissatisfaction in my heart. His demands seem to be a little too selfish, and he demands too much from his other half, and he doesn't seem to be paying accordingly.
In the following conversation, I tried to talk to him more about family and life, trying to get a sense of what he really thought about these issues. However, there was always a stubbornness and self-righteousness in his answers, which made it difficult for me to continue the conversation.
Wang Qiang continued to talk about his ideal family, which made me feel a little tired. His words revealed the expectation of women taking care of the housework and the conservative view of family life, which made my impression of him more and more ambiguous. He seems to have a clear vision of his role, but he doesn't take into account the feelings of his other half.
I tried to shift the conversation to more relaxed territory, hoping to ease the dreary atmosphere. "What do you like to do for fun?" I asked him.
"I like to work out and watch movies," Wang replied, "Fitness keeps me healthy, and movies make me relax." ”
"Do you have any favorite genres of film?" I tried to find common ground.
"I like action movies and sci-fi movies, what about you?" Wang Qiang looked at me, a flash of anticipation in his eyes.
"I prefer dramas and comedies," I replied, "and I feel like these genres are more relaxing." ”
Wang Qiang seemed a little disappointed with my answer, but he still responded politely: "Each has its own good." ”
We continued to talk about the film for a while, and although I wasn't very interested, I tried to keep the conversation flowing. However, this superficial exchange hardly allowed me to get to know him more deeply.
Then, Wang Qiang suddenly asked me, "Do you have any expectations for the other half in the future?"
"I want the other person to respect my work and understand my way of life," I replied frankly, "and the most important thing is communication and understanding with each other." ”
"Well, communication is really important," Wang Qiang nodded, "I think mutual respect is the foundation of marriage." ”
"Yes," I chimed in, "respects each other to build a healthy relationship." ”
However, the topic of Wang Qiang soon returned to his requirements for future family life. He talked about how he wants his significant other to be able to play traditional roles in the home, such as taking care of the family and children. This made me feel complicated again.
"I think you have your own opinion on the distribution of family roles," I said tentatively.
"Yes, I feel that the traditional family structure helps a lot in family stability. Wang Qiang replied firmly.
"However, in modern society, the roles of men and women have changed a lot," I responded, "and it is the equal relationship that makes a marriage more stable." ”
Wang Qiang didn't seem to care too much about my point of view, but continued to emphasize his point of view. He seems to have a strong belief in the family model he is pursuing, and I feel that we have a clear disagreement on this issue.
Even though the conversation gradually became a bit dull, I still tried to be polite and hope to find more interesting topics in it. However, Wang Qiang seems to be too insistent on his own views and lacks understanding of my views. This made my patience wear out and I started to think about how to end this blind date.
Just when I was thinking about how to end this blind date, Wang Qiang brought up a new topic, and he asked me: "What do you think about the economic distribution after marriage?"
I was caught off guard by his question, which is indeed an important topic for future marriages. After a moment's thought, I replied, "I think the economic distribution should be equal, and both parties should be responsible for the family's finances. ”
"Equality is indeed ideal," Wang Qiang nodded, "but in reality, in many cases, women may need to temporarily take a break from work because they are pregnant and have children, and men should take on more financial responsibilities." ”
I replied approvingly: "This is also a situation in reality, and the economic distribution in the family should be adjusted according to the actual situation. ”
Wang Qiang continued: "I think that after getting married, the property of both parties should be joint, and both parties should be responsible for the family. ”
"Yes," I chimed in, "it's the shared responsibility that makes a marriage stronger." ”
However, I noticed that when Wang Qiang talked about this topic, there was a dominant attitude in his tone. He seems to prefer to approach the economy on his own terms rather than with his significant other. I began to wonder if he could really respect the other person's opinion.
Wang Qiang went on to talk about his views on economic distribution and mentioned that he hopes that the future partner will fully trust him and hand over economic power to him. He also mentioned that he thinks men should have more control over the economy, which upsets me.
"I think both sides should have an equal say in economic matters," I said tentatively, "after all, the future of the family is at stake." ”
Wang Qiang didn't seem to fully agree with my point of view, but he responded politely: "I understand your point of view, but I think women may be more economically affected, so it may be safer to let men lead the way." ”
His answer gave me the impression that we had a clear disagreement on this issue. I began to worry that if I continued to engage with him, there would be more conflicts on these issues.
Wang Qiang continued to talk about his views on marriage and family, which made me feel a little helpless. His views seem too traditional and conservative, while mine is more modern and open-minded. This clash of ideas made me even more skeptical of the outcome of this blind date.
At the end of the conversation, I tried to steer the conversation to something else, hoping to find more common ground. However, Wang Qiang's conversation still revolves around his views and demands, which makes me feel increasingly difficult to continue the conversation.
Eventually, I decided to end the blind date as soon as possible so that both parties didn't waste time. I politely thanked Wang Qiang and said that I benefited a lot from this blind date, but I think we have differences on many issues. This is my euphemistic attitude of not wanting to continue associating.
Wang Qiang seemed a little surprised, but he politely accepted my decision. He smiled and said goodbye to me, and we ended the blind date.
When I left the café, I was relieved. This blind date made me understand what I really need and strengthened my position. I realized that in the process of finding a significant other, the matching of values and goals is far more important than the superficial conditions.
Although the outcome of this blind date was not what I had hoped, it gave me some new food for thought. I summed up the experience of this blind date in my mind and decided to be more cautious when choosing a partner in the future to ensure that the other person and I share the same values and life goals.
When I got home, I shared the experience of the blind date with my friends. They listened to my description and expressed sympathy and understanding. They also mentioned their own experiences in blind dates, some successes, some failures, and we all comforted each other.
"You're doing the right thing," said my friend Xiaoli, "stick to your own standards, and one day you'll find the right person." ”
"yes, don't compromise your bottom line," added another friend, David, "and you'll learn more about yourself in the process." ”
Hearing the encouragement of my friends made me feel a little warm. Although this blind date was disappointing, it also strengthened my belief. I knew that I deserved to find someone who was really right for me, not to settle for the sake of getting married.
In the days that followed, I continued to focus on my work and life. At the same time, I also began to re-examine my expectations for my future marriage. I decided not to rush to find my other half and let everything take its course. I believe that when I keep an open mind and stick to my principles, one day, I will meet that person who is truly a good match for me.
After this blind date, I cherish my current independent life even more. I decided to spend more time focusing on my interests and hobbies and nurturing my own personal growth. I started signing up for some interest classes and activities to make more like-minded friends, which made me feel more fulfilled in my life.
Although this blind date did not bring the desired result, it gave me a new perspective on my life. I've learned to stand firmer in my search for my partner, while keeping an open mind to the challenges ahead.
Ultimately, this experience made me cherish my life more and believe that I would eventually find the right person for me.
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