The night was dark, and I was alone on the squeaky old sofa in the living room looking at the yellowed photo albums, the old photos carried the vicissitudes of the years, and the familiar faces evoked countless memories. I am Zhang Haifeng, an ordinary middle-aged man, a small leader of a small company. The ordinary and boring days never seem to have any big waves, until the sudden vibration of the mobile phone breaks through the silent night.
The mobile phone screen shows "family group", which is a message from cousin Zhang Qiang: [Cousin Zhang Qiang: The second aunt left this afternoon, and the family is in a mess. After so many years of silence, you should at least come back this time, right?]
I was shocked in my heart and pursed my lips, my second aunt and I, the chattering Li Guihua, the disputes over the years cannot be explained clearly in one or two sentences. My son Zhang Peng walked out of the room, saw me stunned, and asked, "Dad, what's wrong?"
I let out a long sigh and didn't answer his question directly, but looked back on the past: "Do you know? My second aunt never liked me, she always said that I had low eyes and skills, and I didn't know how to learn. ”
Zhang Peng frowned, sat next to me, and said, "This... Maybe it's just a way for elders to motivate younger generations. ”
I shook my head and smiled bitterly in my heart: "You don't understand, when she said those words, her eyes were not full of expectation, but contempt." ”
After being silent for a while, Zhang Peng spoke, and his voice was firm: "No matter what, she is an elder after all, and now the second aunt has..."
I interrupted him and said, "I'm not going." After so many years, she can't get along with me, why should I give her face?"
"But in the face of the deceased, we should always have the most basic respect..."
"Respect?" I sneered, "Do you know how much about that conflict back then? Respect is a two-way street, I don't feel her respect for me, why should I bow my head?"
Zhang Peng wanted to say something more, but I had already gotten up and walked towards my room, he chased a few steps, and his voice was full of worry: "Dad, don't be estranged from the family because of these things. ”
"That's their business, what does it matter to me. I replied without looking back.
The moment I closed the door, my phone vibrated again, it was a missed call from my cousin. I hesitated for a moment, but I still didn't pick it up, in this life, I have had enough of that woman's interests and unreasonable accusations. Some people may say that I am cold-blooded and ruthless, but they don't know that some wounds are far more difficult to heal than flesh and blood.
I lay on the bed, staring at the ceiling and pondering, how should I face the accusations of my family, and how should I comfort my soul that had been accused for no reason?
The morning after I refused to go to the funeral, a ray of sunlight shone obliquely on the kitchen table, and I sat down to enjoy a hot cup of morning tea, while Zhang Peng stood across from me with a serious face.
"Dad, I've made a decision, I want to go to the funeral. Zhang Peng looked at me deeply, his eyes firm.
I was shocked, "Why do you have to be bored?"
Zhang Peng was silent for a while, and then said slowly: "Second aunt treats me well, you were always busy when you were a child, she often took me to the park and bought me delicious food." ”
"But..." I tried to refute it, but found that I couldn't find a strong enough reason to convince him and convince myself.
"I know there was any misunderstanding between the second aunt and you in the past, but those are your business. Zhang Peng's voice revealed a calmness.
I was angry: "Misunderstanding? You think it's all trivial? You don't know how much she affects me!"
Zhang Peng quietly refuted: "I only know that she is gone now, and the people who stay behind should behave benevolently and righteously." ”
There was a flash of wavering in my heart, but soon I said forcefully: "Even if she is gone, so what?
Zhang Peng shook his head: "Yes, I know you have a thorn in your heart, but I don't want our entire family to be full of rifts because of past grievances, and..."
I interrupted him impatiently: "And what? Do you think that your going represents the respect of our whole family for the second aunt?"
"At least I went, it was an explanation to myself. Zhang Peng said calmly and forcefully.
At this time, I realized that my son was no longer the child who needed my guidance, he had his own thoughts, his own judgments, and even if I disagreed, he had the right to stand up for himself.
After a long silence, I asked him, "Do you really feel compelled to go?"
Zhang Peng nodded: "Yes, Dad." I feel like that's right. ”
"Okay. I let out a long breath, but after all, I didn't stop him, and subconsciously, for a moment, I felt a trace of respect for this child's persistence.
My son walked out of the house without looking back, and I sat at the dining table in deep thought, every word he said weighed on my heart like a heavy stone. In fact, I have been tormenting in my heart, am I doing this to insist on the so-called "dignity", or am I just escaping from the past that I can't face?
With Zhang Peng's departure, the loneliness and loneliness at home became more profound. I closed my eyes, and the crisp sound of wind chimes outside the window was in my ears, which was given to him by his second aunt when Zhang Peng was a child.
Just as Zhang Peng was leaving home and on the way to the funeral, a message suddenly came from the family group. It was the daughter of the second aunt, Li Xiaomei sent it, and the words were full of eagerness: "Cousin, wait a minute, I have something important to tell you, please don't go to my mother's funeral first." ”
Zhang Peng stopped, replied to the message, and turned to go home: "Sister Xiaomei, what's wrong?
Li Xiaomei looked very anxious: "Yes, I found evidence about the misunderstanding between my mother and your father. ”
Zhang Peng immediately called, "Sister, what have you found?" tell me quickly. ”
Li Xiaomei's voice on the other end of the phone choked: "Everyone blamed my mother for the inheritance problem after my grandfather's death, thinking that she instigated my grandfather to revise the will and fell into your father's share." ”
"Isn't it? Dad mentioned it too. Zhang Peng was puzzled.
Li Xiaomei continued after a pause: "I found some old letters, which were left by my grandfather, and he told my mother at the time that he decided it himself, because he felt that his father's family was in better condition and did not need that inheritance. Mom has been protecting your dad for fear that this incident will ruin your brother's feelings. ”
Zhang Peng's mind flashed back to the past when his father Zhang Haifeng was angry and debating with his second aunt, when he was too young, and he only vaguely felt that the atmosphere at home had become tense.
"Then why didn't my mother explain it in the first place?" Zhang Peng's tone became complicated.
"You know what kind of person Grandpa is, and Mom doesn't want him to be under the pressure of family conflicts while he's alive. Li Xiaomei replied.
Zhang Peng was silent, he understood a lot of the unsolved mysteries between his father and his second aunt for those years. He quickly returned home, rushed into the living room, and saw his father Zhang Haifeng still sitting on the sofa with a deep frown, and immediately handed him his mobile phone: "Dad, look at this." ”
Zhang Haifeng took the phone suspiciously, every word of the letter in front of him was like a hammer hitting his heart, and those misunderstandings and resentments that had been stubborn for many years collapsed in an instant. The corners of his eyes couldn't help but moisten: "This... Is this true? Xiaomei gave you this?"
"Yes, Dad. Zhang Peng's tone was soft, "We all misunderstood, second aunt she..."
She has been carrying this matter all the time, and for the sake of family harmony, she chose to remain silent. Zhang Haifeng's sorrow came from it, his words were full of guilt, and his heart that had been blocked by misunderstanding for a long time suddenly opened up.
The truth is like the morning sun, dispelling the gloom in my heart. I, Zhang Haifeng, holding the letter in my mobile phone, stood in front of the mirror, staring at my face that had been precipitated over the years, and the sin and remorse in my heart spread.
"Dad, let's go together. Zhang Peng stood quietly by the door, looking at me with his calm and determined eyes.
I nodded, feeling a long-lost sense of relief, and our father and son walked through the threshold together towards the second aunt's house.
From a distance, I saw my cousins Zhang Qiang and Li Xiaomei standing at the door of the funeral, and they saw us with complicated expressions on their faces. As I approached, my steps became heavy.
"Haifeng, you're here. Zhang Qiang's eyes were a little surprised and relieved.
I took a deep breath and looked at Li Xiaomei: "Xiaomei, for so many years, I have wrongly blamed your mother. ”
Li Xiaomei shook her head, and a wry smile appeared on the corner of her mouth: "Brother, let the past pass, if my mother knows, she will be very pleased." ”
During the funeral, I stood there, looking at the portrait of my second aunt, and I had a thousand words to tell. In the end, I stepped forward, offered a bouquet of white flowers to my second aunt, and whispered: "Sister Osmanthus, I'm late, today I'm going to tell you, I understand everything, I'm sorry." ”
Zhang Peng, who was on the side, looked at me quietly, and a hint of relief flashed in his eyes.
After the ceremony, I took Zhang Peng and went to Zhang Qiang and Li Xiaomei's side, and I said: "I don't want to mention the misunderstanding over the years, today I want to start again and be the big brother who is happy with the family." ”
Zhang Qiang and Li Xiaomei looked at each other and smiled, and stretched out their hands.
I turned around and glanced at Zhang Peng, who looked at me and said with a smile, "Dad, you did the right thing." ”
On the way home, I asked Zhang Peng: "Do you say that I have been stubborn for so many years, is it worth it?"
"Dad, everyone has mistakes, the important thing is that we can learn from mistakes and grow. Zhang Peng's words made me think deeply.
As the evening breeze blew, I looked up at the starry sky with a lot of thoughts. In the face of loss and search, the collision of tradition and modernity, can we all have the courage to face the truth in our hearts?