Each of us will face a lot of problems in life, how ordinary people around us overcome difficulties, this kind of real experience and experience, is a very powerful story.
In the real sharing of tree holes and backstage, the kind of story that most impressed me was how stay-at-home mothers killed back to the workplace.
Not only because I have been a stay-at-home mother, but also because in such a story, the needs of all mothers are strongly reflected - after becoming a mother, is my personal value still there?
Today, I will share with you these authentic stories from readers about returning to the workplace.
They are not a cool drama, there is no headwind overturning from the sky, only a mother who has worked hard to return to the workplace, they use their own practical actions, bravely broke through the "dare not, can't" and rushed to the "self".
01
"I have taken care of my family wholeheartedly for many years, but how can I not write it in my resume?"
—
@Jenny Hu Ruoxue, who just received her first offer after 3 years of full-time, wrote down these experiences
I am a mother who graduated from graduate school and got pregnant at the same time, and I did not have a job until the child was three years old, so I can say that I have stayed at home without entering the workplace. But I was lucky enough to start looking for a job and the first resume was successfully received after a few rounds of interviews.
This kind of inner excitement, I think only those who have experienced it can understand. I was able to successfully get the offer I have now, thanks to a persistence in the three years I have not been to work, insisting on resisting the "meaningless" full-time life.
First, learn in parenting.
After becoming a mother, I was inspired by an unprecedented enthusiasm for learning, learning parenting, learning to pick picture books, reading picture books, learning English enlightenment, learning Chinese enlightenment, and so on. Each book is carefully read to children, slowly accumulated, and draws nourishment from it. Children are less than two and a half years old, and we have read thousands of picture books in English Chinese, and some picture books may have been read hundreds of times.
Although I have a background in studying abroad, there are also many words, words, etc. in my children's picture books that I don't know, so I keep checking and listening to others read them in the process until I imitate them to sound tasteful. This dedication and accumulation eventually led me to find a part-time job as a spoken English teacher, which did not affect my children, but also made me feel happy and earn some silver.
Second, helping others is also helping yourself
Three months after giving birth, I went to a non-profit organization on weekends under pressure from all my family to work part-time as a Chinese teacher, and at no cost, I worked for a year and a half.
It's not so much that I helped others this year as a teacher, but rather that this experience helped me get infinitely closer to what I want to do in the future. Not only did I find a sense of value outside of family, parenting, and housework, but it also supplemented some of my blank experience, and I saw my shortcomings in actual teaching, thus changing myself. It also allowed me not to leave my major for too long, in the process I accumulated experience and won the recognition of the parents of the school. Although there is no cost, it is difficult to buy me happy.
Third, we are not satisfied with the status quo and are not afraid of the future.
I am not afraid of the unknown difficulties that come with the emergence of anything new, because I feel that difficulties are for solving.
After the start of the epidemic, almost all courses were switched to online, so I had to quickly change the way I took classes, and I had to start learning new teaching tools and facing new teaching challenges. I started learning about various classes and various interactive games that I could use on the Internet. I just didn't learn to program my own game!
All of the above things have been done non-stop for three years, and in the end these experiences helped me win this offer. By the way, the job I applied for has requirements for Chinese and English, even Spanish, so I may learn Spanish in the future, but what am I afraid of! When mom has done such a hard thing!
In short, I think that being able to be unafraid of new things and difficulties, have what I have decided to do, and always try to go in that direction little by little, will eventually gain something.
I hope my sharing will help moms.
@Micky Mom 2 years full-time from "who she called to recruit" step by step to the head of the department
Because of the poor physical condition during pregnancy, the child was found to be stunted at 9 months and recovered until 16 months, during which the rotation continued, there was no socialization, no time for respite. Leaving the workplace for two full years, I began to look for a job, and I put a lot of resumes into the sea, and there was no way, I had to lower the requirements again and again. Many interviews have not ended.
One of the most memorable interviewers interviewed for two minutes, glanced at me casually, and then coldly and politely asked me to go home and wait for the notification. At the moment of stepping through the door, I heard the interviewer shouting at the person: Who called for the job!
At that moment, I felt more than shame, but deep powerlessness. It turned out that there was no social networking that made me stumble when I answered.
Later, I began to simulate the interview scene, listed the questions that may be asked in the interview, repeated it again and again in front of the mirror every day, cheekily and tirelessly asked my former colleagues to ask me about the changes in the industry that I left in the past two years, so that I would review it after each interview...
In this way, I joined the current company, constantly learning, adjusting myself, and step by step to achieve the position of supervisor.
02
"After 100 resumes and 99 times, I'm really okay?"
—
@CC Sauce full-time for 2 years
She said: "Ordinary mothers, they should try to find their love and shining points"
Hello Big J, I immediately clicked in when I saw the topic you posted, thank you for paying close attention to this group.
I am a post-90s mother, and I am considered to be the first among my classmates to have children. I don't go to work, more on the pretext of taking care of children, to avoid the workplace, I have 3 times failed workplace experience:
My first job after graduation was laid off in the whole department because of financing problems;
The second time I worked, I joined the mutual fund company that was very popular at that time, and I had a certain degree of relevance to this profession, thinking that I could do a big job, and the whole industry was destroyed;
The third time, I left the first-tier city and returned to my hometown to find the largest local Internet company but unexpectedly became pregnant.
My superiors advised me not to have children, but I did not accept it, although I did not delay the work at that time, and I was directly hit with a minimum performance C at the end of the year.
After giving birth, I was already in the most junior position, and then I resigned, chose to run to a first-tier city with my husband, wholeheartedly supported his career, and began my full-time life.
Without the freshness at the beginning, there is an endless sense of loneliness and anxiety, the longest insomnia period is half a month, from 100 pounds to 70 pounds, at that time I knew that in the current state, I could not continue to maintain the determination to "treat my children and husband as a career".
I called my grandmother to bring me the baby and started looking for a job.
But from making up your mind to doing a good resume, 1 month has passed. Wait until the resume is ready to be cast, to the first interview, half a year has passed.
The most profound one, in a small room without air conditioning, waited for the interviewer for 1 hour, the other party asked me some data questions from previous work, I tried hard to recall, and I was nervously stuck.
Then he asked: Why did you rest for nearly 2 years without work? I'll be honest: I've been taking care of my kids at home during this time.
This sentence is like handing me a knife that can stab me at will.
He looked me up and down for a few minutes before stopping asking. At that moment, I couldn't take care of anything, and I couldn't help but cry at the serious face in front of me.
That interview basically consumed my last bit of confidence.
When I got home, I hugged my mother and cried, comforting myself over and over again: "Probably like my mother in this life, I can be an ordinary housewife."
The days went on as I pretended to lie flat.
Until one day, a public account I usually pay attention to released recruitment revelations - need a small partner who pays attention to self-media, has enthusiasm for content creation, is good at discovering hot issues, and coordinates the planning of topics - I am interested, but the first thought is still: I have not done it, I can't do it.
But faintly, there was still a voice pushing me to try: just be the last attempt.
I carefully revised my resume again, because the loss of heart is not so heavy, and for the first time, I carefully sorted out the places where several interviews failed and were stuck, and submitted interview questions in time.
A week later, I successfully received an offer and was working in both directions with my passion. Ended this 2-year window.
I'm thankful for the experience, it wasn't just a job for me, it gave me the opportunity to restart my life.
In contrast, I opened a review where I could share a few tips (if I could count).
1, the things you really love to insist on doing, do it will have a way out
Although I think that for mothers who want to return to work, the shorter the "empty window period", the better, I also believe that what is done during the empty window period hides the true love and state in a person's bones.
I like to read articles, a variety of books, public self-media, Weibo, sharing posts on shopping platforms, Douban groups, film reviews; watch a wide range of dramas, well-known American dramas, Japanese dramas I am interested in taking a look, like to listen to podcasts, small universes, Himalayas, the newly launched app I do not refuse to experience.
After reading it, I will casually post it on Weibo or the circle of friends to share, and I will also write a little bit of experience on social platforms and write about it for a long time on a shopping platform, accumulating a little bit of small fans.
These little hobbies that I thought were inhumane and unproductive, I didn't expect to be used in my work, and even doing some auxiliary work was very helpful (I had briefly studied online electronic illustration before), and many small things became the "nourishment" for this opportunity today.
In the future, I plan to make up some psychological and sociological expertise for myself, not only for work, but also to enrich the thickness of my life.
I believe that you who read the article at this time must also have such a thing, even if you insist on doing things in the chaotic parenting life, you will not feel tired, and I believe that there will be a way out when you do it.
2, push it, push it, boldly push it
I don't know if anyone is like me, especially like me, who loves to set limits for myself, thinking about everything: When I am ready, I can write better words, I should not be good enough now...
This experience taught me a truth: when you don't push a problem yourself, you don't even know where the difficulties will be.
When I first saw the job posting, I wrestled with "it's not the best state yet" and "I'm sure I'll lose face again", but then luckily, I pressed the send button.
Today is Saturday, the child has a father to take over, in his room, plug in the headphones, open the computer to type this string of words, I have been back to the workplace for 1 year, perhaps only the mother can appreciate how happy it is to be able to focus on and completely do a little of their own things.
To say a little too much, Bless every mom has the courage to start over. May we all sprint on the runway of our lives as always!
Thanks to my mother who helped me with my baby, we were always afraid of disappointing my parents, and they were even more afraid that we would not be happy and confident
03 "I believe in myself, as many times as I leave, I can come back as many times!"
—
@super W full-time for 4 years, she said: "I have more time, but it is later than others."
I hugged them for three years and didn't work for four years. From opening my own shop and closing down to returning to school as a kindergarten teacher, and also experiencing unemployment and marital emergency, let me tell you about my experience.
When the second was under the age of one, he persuaded his husband to set up a shop near the future house, expecting to open a shop while taking the baby, and then stabilize it for half a year and then decorate and live in a new house as soon as possible.
As a result, he lacked experience, opened a store with a degree of work beyond imagination, and quickly recognized the reality and ended this wrong experience.
When I went back to the workplace, I chose to go to the old kindergarten as a kindergarten teacher, and the salary was not as high as the internship salary when I graduated, but at that time, I was not familiar with life and wanted to take care of the baby, I could feel a stable job, which gave me the confidence and stability that I had been missing for a long time.
Husband and wife quarreled, separated from the two places, dad took the second half a year, and accidentally pregnant with the third child, etc., until the second brother also went to kindergarten, and finally persuaded grandpa to come out to help return to Xiamen to work.
Commuting to and from home and home all day, commuting for almost three hours, but I don't regret it, because I can come back every day to see my children and personally send two children to school in the morning.
This time, I finally climbed back to the middle level.
But later, Xiamen epidemic and industry reasons, I was unemployed, at that time the marriage was urgent, I was ready to divorce and take two babies independently, did not care about sadness, seamlessly started a business at home, and made a small dinner table to survive.
After half a year, I took the baby and cooked rice to class, and found that I was still tired of not making money, so I decided to go to work. Entrusted with all the friends who may help, I did not pick, did not want to find a job with a good salary near home, the child was handed over to the custody, I can finally start working in the workplace again.
I am a graduate of a prestigious school, before giving birth to a baby is also a bright resume, the result is that because I can't put down my children, my career has experienced many breaks, changes in careers, my classmates have made some achievements, and I am still working hard, and my heart is sometimes difficult to calm.
Others have parents, relatives and friends or pig teammates, and I have almost supported myself for so many years, and even I can be regarded as the main backbone of my pig teammates.
It is a lie to say that there is no grievance. I try to avoid thinking about negative memories, and most of the time I think about how to take the next step and how to solve the difficulties in front of me.
The only consolation is probably that there are two cute and healthy children in front of me, my efforts have been seen, and my husband and I finally understand each other again and hold hands, and my father rushed home to take the baby during the weekend holidays.
Now I have no high morale, and I only hope to have a job as a family friend. After going through multiple workplaces, I believe that I am a fairly capable employee.
For example: I have a strong ability to adapt and learn, I have a firm belief, and I believe that I will not go without work at any step, just depending on whether I am willing to put down my body.
I like to read biographies, and many people who make a career are ordinary people before the age of 35, but they work harder and insist on learning than others. I'm 35 years old, and I'm laughing at myself that I have more time, just a little later than others.
Anyway, tomorrow is a new day, come on!
04 Epilogue
Over the years, the Internet has been full of "full-time housewife anxiety" and "workplace 35+", and even I myself have been the one who desperately wants to work.
The dilemma of the workplace, the difficulty of mothers burning several heads in their careers and families, and the doubts of "what value can I have" in middle age, these are not only full-time mothers, but any mother, even women who have not given birth to a baby, also have to face.
In addition to waiting for the environment to be more friendly to women, we can take the initiative to launch an impact, as long as we want, we can plan; as long as we start, it is possible to move forward step by step - break through all the shackles tied to the body!
Finally, you are also welcome to share your experience with moms who have the same experience in the message area, I believe that true stories can help more people.