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Oniguzi, a figure of the Warring States period, a representative of Taoism, was honored by the Bing family as a saint. Oniguzi's grasp of life and the ability to see through human nature still have high reference value more than two thousand years later.
His scholarship is more about practicality, which is summed up after many experiences, and today we will take a look at the classic 4 rules of oniguzi on the world.
1
Oniguzi: Desire to be high and low, desire to take the opposite
If a person wants to go up, he must first understand humility.
If you want to get the benefits that others give you, then you have to give first; if you want to get what you want, then you have to work hard first, all the same truth.
However, in real life, there are many people who do not understand this truth, who want to get money, but do not want to continue to work hard, but think of the sword to take the side, take advantage of the opportunity to catch a hand, or desperately take risks, try to go in the direction of the diameter, get a small amount of money, but pay the price.
Some people want to climb to a high position, and then step on others, use it as a stepping stone, and what he does, everyone sees in his eyes, so no one is willing to give him a chance, nor will they believe him. On the contrary, people who know how to be humble can get the trust of others and go to the end.
Similarly, if you want to cultivate networks and get help from others in your future work, then you must first give others corresponding benefits, and others will think of you at this juncture.
Everything is mutually exclusive, no one can always prevail, no one can always take advantage, two-way, there may be different surprises.
2
Oniguzi: Mutual benefit is affinity, and mutual loss is neglect
If each other can bring benefits to each other, the relationship is closer; if they cause mutual involvement or damage, the relationship will be estranged.
Here, Oniguzi is also telling us that in a relationship, if it can bring benefits to each other, then the relationship is worth maintaining, on the contrary, the relationship must be estranged, and the benefits here may include many things, such as money, fame, and emotions.
Parents can take care of their children without complaint or regret, and they also hope that they can fulfill their filial piety when they grow up; the husband and wife relationship loves each other, and also hopes that each other can pay each other and help each other, rather than one person to bear everything; the friendship relationship is maintained for a long time, and they also hope that you can come and go, rather than hot face paste cold ass.
So, how should we build good relationships with others as human beings? Oniguzi has put forward three points: first, seek common ground while reserving differences, understand each other's advantages and disadvantages, and learn from each other's strong points, so that the other party can better run into each other; second, find common ground in each other's interests, which is also the basis of a good relationship between the two sides; the third is to find ways to narrow the distance between each other, have intimate relationship points, and have a close relationship, so that they can better communicate and understand.
Establishing a good relationship with others, "benefiting each other is close, and losing is alienating" is an immutable truth.
3
Oniguzi: Knowing oneself, knowing oneself and then knowing oneself
Truly understand yourself, and then you can understand others.
This sentence and "know thyself, know each other, never lose a battle" has the same magic, in daily life, many people only see others, think that understanding the habits and minds of others, you can grasp all, but ignore the examination of yourself, do not know their own weight.
As a result, they do not know how to be a person, do not know how to improve, think they are smart, but in the end they fail in things, or they are always infinitely magnified by the shortcomings of others, they are always invisible to their own shortcomings, and even think that they are always in charge.
When Zhao Kuo talked about soldiers on paper, he always believed that his martial arts and deployment were incomparable to others, so that he died on the battlefield, which was the result of not recognizing himself first.
In society, getting along with people must produce various connections and relationships, and if we want to deal with each other's relationships well, we must know both others and ourselves.
I may wish to take a little time to examine myself, reflect on myself to improve my behavior, summarize the advantages and disadvantages in work and interpersonal communication, and then correct the deficiencies, so that I can know myself and do better.
4
Oniguzi is a whisperer, and he is loyal
Speaking of those adulterous words, such people appear loyal because of flattery.
Villains tell lies and flattery, all for the sake of profit. Some subordinates, in order to promote and raise their salaries, flatter their superiors, say all kind things, and even on some issues, they obviously have to approve of bad things, just to win good feelings.
Such a person, although he praises others all the time, is a villain, and the villain cannot be deeply friendly, because what they value is always only interests, and for the sake of interests, they can even sell their friendships.
Similarly, friends fellowship, not only to say good things, but to tell each other bluntly, for friends, there is a bad side, also dare to say it, should be persuaded, should be scolded will be scolded, so that is the true friend should have the look, rather than watching you go astray and saying that you did the right thing.
If a person has no position and says good things to you regardless of the occasion, then this person must have other intentions, as a leader, carefully reuse such a person, as a friend, and also consider whether it is worth making deep friends.
END