Qingwei | Han Jingwen: The way of the girl

The path of the sharp girl

Text/Han Jingwen

One bright morning, accompanied by a girl's "wow-wow-wow" and earth-shattering loud cries, a new life was born. The birth of a new life should have been a pleasant thing, but because of the birth of such an unwelcome new life, the smile of the whole family's expectation was stiffened, and the last hope of the whole family was shattered. In an instant, Grandpa was much older, and he sighed and said to himself, "Oh, girl, it's a girl again." ”

Grandma stood at the window, looking up at the long sky, followed by a series of laments, "Four sons, how can you not expect a grandson?" Dad said without anger, "If you are not born, you are born, so what do you think?" Strangle her? Then there was a dead silence, and only the cries of babies could be heard.

This baby was me, the least supposed girl in the family.

Before I was born, my family was looking forward to having a boy. Grandparents, in particular, look forward to the stars and the moon, look forward to the birth of their grandchildren.

The eldest bride had three children, all three of whom were girls. One of them had an accident for some reason and caused a neurological dysfunction, in short, the brain became abnormal and became a burden on the family. Grandpa did not dare to persuade them to have children anymore, for fear that they would not be able to raise them.

The second uncle is a combination family, the second mother has a daughter before, she has a history of neuropathy, and the grandfather does not dare to provoke.

The third lady first gave birth to a daughter, and then she was not easy to conceive again, and heard others say that if she wanted a son, even if she was a female fetus, she could take medicine to change into a boy and change gender. She believes in folk remedies, no matter whether she is pregnant with a man or a woman in her belly, in order to be foolproof, the third lady took medicine and single-mindedly wanted to give birth to a man. Unexpectedly, pregnant in October, she finally gave birth to a four-dimensional freak. After the third lady became insane. Grandpa didn't dare expect her to have a baby.

The only one who has the most hope in the rest is the mother. Instead, my birth shattered his last glimmer of hope. Because Mom and Dad were public officials, they could only have one child according to the national family planning policy at that time!

Grandpa knew that her mother was fierce, and if she was forced to do so, she might not give in, but if she did the opposite, she might still have some chances. So he changed his strategy, did not force her again, but took the opportunity to sigh in her ear that he had given birth to four boys, but to his father, none of them were angry in their generation. There is not even a person who inherits the bloodline, saying that there is no hope for anything or anything like that.

In the village, the older generation of people are very feudal in their thinking, and everyone feels that only men can inherit the bloodline and are entitled to inherit the family property. If there is not even a single male among the descendants of the whole family, then this family must have done something unseemly in the eyes of everyone. Even God couldn't look at it, and only then would he be punished with this.

At the beginning, only Grandpa said in his mother's ear that her mother could still hold back, and who knows, later the whole town was talking about it behind her back. Poking Grandpa and his father's brothers in the back gradually evolved into something that was not just about Grandpa.

Some people say that the father's life is a root, and it is going to be broken. Gradually, the eldest bride and the third bride in the house all ran to persuade their mother to send me away, so that my mother finally made up her mind to have another child.

The father and the second uncle helped others to go to the loess, and the people in the town liked the young and strong, and those who chose the father and the second uncle first. But there was a headless and brainless middle-aged man on the side who scolded a few words, one of which was about breaking the root after the end. The second uncle could not explain it clearly and directly moved his fist with the person, and the result of injuring the person was that in addition to the medical expenses, there were all kinds of condemnations and rumors, and for a while the grandfather, the father, and the uncle all seemed to be saddled with a crime of cutting off their children and grandchildren.

A few days later, Grandpa was going to send me away, but my mother cried and cried, "No, no, this is the flesh of my body, I hurt!" But Grandpa's heart was not shaken, insisting on sending me away, and My father looked at my mother, who had long been unable to cry, and said: "Although it is inappropriate, it is his own flesh and blood, stay." Dad's loud voice stopped the crying around him, and there was silence in the house.

The mother finally fell silent and said to her father: "Even if giving birth to a son represents dignity, then I can't give birth, I don't want to abandon my own flesh and blood, I don't want to be expelled from public office, if I don't have a job, I have a second child indicator, I can consider giving birth to you, even if someone else drives a plane and we ride a bicycle, I will definitely give birth to a son for you, but now, I can't give birth." If there is no public office, even if the second child is supernatural, I will give birth to your family, and it is a big deal that I leave here. You can't be born here, there's no way. I'm not going crazy for my son. ”

This time, Grandpa was helpless, but he did not argue with his mother excessively. Grandpa did not say anything more, nor did he force his mother to give birth, or threaten to divorce if he did not give birth.

Perhaps, he felt that it was no longer realistic for this family to have a boy.

In this way, I was left behind.

Later, Dad heard from a neighbor that Grandpa had been crying on his ancestral grave for three days because he had no grandson.

My grandparents didn't want to see me, they kept a straight face on me from beginning to end, and even when they were talking and laughing with others, I squeezed in front of them, and the smiles on their faces immediately disappeared like soap bubbles, and were always replaced by a fierce, cold face. They put all their hopes on their mother, hoping that her mother would live up to expectations and give birth to a fat boy for them. To this end, Grandpa prepared a lot of novelty toys, not only bought in piles at home, but also made by himself. Unexpectedly, he just drew water from a bamboo basket, empty joy, and was disappointed.

Time flickered, seven years passed, and as I grew older, I gradually understood more and more things, and I understood that My grandfather's heart had never been biased toward me from the beginning, and had always disliked me. Even if it is the New Year's pressure money, they have never given me. Many times, I have watched them hand over the big red new hundred-dollar bills to their stepchildren and grandchildren, who are already adults in their twenties, and their own granddaughters, the little granddaughters, can only let tears swirl in their eyes.

Again and again, I made up my mind that I must impress my grandparents in my studies.

Since then, I studied hard, buried in the world of books all day, finally, kung fu pays off, last year's holiday, I took the full excellent report card, rushed into the door and handed it to Grandpa first, at this time, Grandpa was reading the report card of his nephew and grandson. It is conceivable that there must be no gratifying subjects in the report card of the nephew and grandson. Look at Grandpa, the eyebrows twisted into big bumps, and then compared with mine, put down the report card, threw the door, and left.

Not long after, Grandpa returned, still carrying a large bag of gifts in his hand, and handed it to his aunt: "Seeing that you have thinned your child, people are thin, they have no energy to read, so the child's grades cannot be raised, which is all to blame you." After saying that, he handed the tonic to his aunt. I listened to the "boom" of my head, what? Are academic performance related to medications? In addition, the younger brother has more than 100 pounds, far more than his peers. Learning depends on hard work and real materials. I would like to say these words, but I can only bury them deep in my heart, I have no right to speak, I am a person who speaks softly.

In the past, eating, wearing, using, Grandpa always tried to meet the requirements of my nieces and grandchildren, but I was not, the most intolerable thing is that as long as I and my nieces and grandchildren have an opinion, Grandpa does not ask who is reasonable and unreasonable, always judging that the nieces and nephews are correct, the mistake falls on my head, for this, I really can't figure it out, is it because I am a girl? None of them are biological, they are so attentive!

A warm spring breeze blows outside the window, ah, so warm, the wind blows, please blow as much as you can! Blow into the hearts of your grandparents, and wake up your grandparents' preferred hearts.

Grandparents, I must fight for the unfair treatment of girls in the world! Be sure to let more people know that girls can surpass boys!

I have performed better and better, in the national competitions in various disciplines, repeatedly won awards, essay competitions are also several awards, I want my grandparents to know, their granddaughters must be outstanding, girls can surpass many boys!

Editor: Ma Xuemin

One point number Qingwei Heze creative base