I will stand in the man's point of view, talk about the truth that my subject has taught me over the years, there is no chicken soup for the soul, it is the history of blood and tears that I have kneeled on the washboard countless times...
1, falling in love is not an easy thing, no matter which stage it is to spend money, spend time, spend energy.
Don't think that if you chase her in the hand, everything will be fine, there are more things that need to be maintained later, if you just covet the pleasure in front of you, don't easily provoke her.
Because no woman wants to wait until the day when she is fully entrusted, she finds that the man in front of her is not reliable at all, which is not only not responsible enough, but also drags the other party into the water.
2. People love each other because they do not understand, and they are separated because they understand.
Don't expect too much from her because you've had a few meals together, watched a few movies, and decided to be together, in fact, you haven't seen each other the most real at this time.
I have not experienced any difficulties, nor have I seen the state of the other party's collapse, but the love that stays in the relationship between wine and flesh does not need to be blown by the wind, and it will be scattered after two steps.
So, don't be so anxious, she is willing to see you the most real way, and is willing to grow up with you, provided that you also want to have a relationship with her, not for other purposes.
3, less use the mouth to fall in love, more use the brain to fall in love
Two people together is a process of upgrading and fighting monsters, you need to constantly find problems, overcome problems, solve problems, and the original intention remains unchanged.
It is impossible to have a 100% partner, nor can it be once and for all, some men have first-class mouth kung fu and are better at drawing cakes than anyone, but as long as they encounter problems, they begin to escape and be afraid, or they can't solve problems to solve people.
Then I sincerely tell you that you are not suitable for love at all, and who you are with is a delay.
Because what a woman wants most is attitude and sincerity, whether you can solve this matter or not, at least in action and details, let her feel loved in a down-to-earth manner.
4, must dig into the phenomenon to see the essence, unfortunately, this is the most obvious shortcomings of men.
I found that men always like to say: "She never wants to communicate with me, she doesn't listen to anything I say", "She is usually cold to me, I am always hot face and cold ass, I am afraid that I will not be able to hold on to it one day".
But in fact, she prefers to hear the words: "I don't know how to communicate with you, I don't know how to maintain a relationship."
When the subject becomes "I", you can think more rationally about the problem, rather than constantly criticizing the other party.
Let me give you a few small examples:
When your lover is overbearing with you and makes you listen to her, if you can see the inferiority behind her, she will become a child who needs protection more than anyone else;
When your lover likes to control you, possessive, and explode at one point, if you can see her inner anxiety, you will not be annoyed by her, but find a way to make up for her sense of security;
When your lover often finds fault and says that you are not good anywhere, if you can see her inner resentment and change the problems that have not been solved in the past, she will not fight with you.
5, women hate to do right and wrong questions, to give her multiple choice questions.
Don't always ask her, "What gift do you want for your birthday?" "Where are you going to eat tomorrow?"
Because asking is also a white question, she will only perfunctory you: "All right, all right", and as a result, after you have arranged, she secretly poked and poked at the fault, saying that you do not consider her.
So simply change the sentence form to: "Which one do you like lipstick or mask?" "Go to hot pot or Japanese food on the weekend?" To reduce the chances of the other party saying "no" in order to increase the success rate of things.
This is also what psychology often calls the "principle of forced choice", which provides her with clear options that can save time and guide her to speak her true thoughts.
To put it bluntly, women just like to let men guess, so we use magic to defeat magic, and lay out the answers in her heart, so that she has to make a choice.
6, the toad can not eat swan meat, the sparrow can not become a phoenix, the value of equality is the bond of the relationship
When I was young, I was also rampant, I felt that I was in good condition, I didn't look ugly, I would play treasure fun, there was always a sense of honey superiority when I was in love, I felt that others were high with me, and I wanted to change to a better one at any time.
Later, after more experience, I realized that after the short-term passion dissipated, value reciprocity is the bond of the relationship, who you are will meet anyone, no matter how decent you look at the job on the surface, how much more you earn than your object, there is no look down on her, or the next will be better, because the reason why you choose her is to prove that she must have something you miss.
Just like I now look down on those men who do not measure up to their own strength, obviously with the wife division of labor is clear, a master inside a master outside, the result of putting up a donor's shelf all day long, think that this home without him can not do, never think in reverse, if not your wife at home day and night with children, do housework, get your parents, can you safely make money outside?
So you can ask your girlfriend to serve you like a child, but first ask yourself: What do I offer in exchange?
7, what a woman wants most is not a car and house ticket, but someone who can feel her needs
I have asked many buddies why they broke up, and everyone's answers are basically the same: "It's not because I don't have money", "Her parents don't agree", "She hates me for being unstable at work".
Most of the good girls don't objectify as much as you might think, and if she really thinks you don't have any money, why would she be with you in the first place? Go directly to the Diamond King Old Five, and what are you wasting time on?
I can tell you responsibly that when women propose to break up, most of them are already tired of not loving, so they use your most irrefutable reasons to reject you.
Because she usually said countless times: "I hope you change some shortcomings, complain that you have never been so attentive, and long that you can care more about her and accompany her..." But you still have not made any make-up actions, so that she is discouraged in the center of disappointment again and again, which is the most real reason to break up.
8, finally, a woman is not as dragging mud and water as you think, do not love it directly, she will freely quit.
Instead of starting to play cold violence or seamless in the name of fear of hurting the other party, deception is the biggest harm.
Psychological test: Test the sentence your ex most wants to say to you
1. Do you argue over small things when you're together?
Yes, I often feel tired —2
Rarely quarrel over small things—2
Occasionally, but soon reconciled —3
2. Do you think you are a person who likes to self-reflect and is willing to correct mistakes?
Yes —3
Not —4
3. Will he or she take the initiative to tell you his troubles?
It is often said that -5
Not much to say —4
4. Would you tell your parents about the process of your relationship?
Everything is too big or small, and I often complain to my parents -6
Occasionally they ask and say —5
Hardly to say, nothing to say —5
5. Faced with what you want, how much energy are you willing to put into acquiring it?
Everything follows fate, and it is mine in the end--7
Try hard, maybe you can succeed - 6
Do my best, I want to get --B
6. Did you break up because of a third party?
Yes—A
No —7
7. Did the other party take the initiative to contact you after the breakup?
Yes—D
No—C