Text/Blue Dream
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Even if two people love each other again, they will still encounter disagreements in their daily relationship, after all, although two people are united because of the emergence of love, they are still two people in essence.
In life, they are susceptible to the influence of the living environment, receptivity and so on. Therefore, in the face of the same situation, they will have different views.
For example, Chen Shan and Sun Lei in "Perfect Partner". As a strong woman, Chen Shan feels that the best gift for her family is a good material life, after all, a penny is difficult to defeat a hero, so she is more aggressive in life.
As a warm man, Sun Lei feels that the best gift for his family is companionship, after all, money is cold, and hugging is warm, so he obviously has good ability, but he is doing a job that can just support his family.
Because of the difference in ideas, even if they are high-level intellectuals, even if they are calm and rational enough, they can often see them quarreling.
That is to say, disputes are inevitable.
Tu Lei said: Many people think that emotion must be emotional, it has no rational component, but in fact, love is art and science, sometimes love needs to be practiced, you see you grow older, you have the same quarrel, a contradictory way, the more mature you are, the better way to solve it, you will not be like the original stunned, mutual intimidation, this is progress.
The reason why a relationship can last is not because the two never quarrel, but because they maintain the necessary calm in the quarrel and will not be led by the emotions in their heads.
Good feelings come from restraint. If a man is willing to do these things for you after a fight, then he really loves you, please cherish it.
1. Sincere apologies
The quarrels between husband and wife are, many times, just different positions, and there is no right or wrong.
The problem is that its existence has indeed caused relatively great harm to both sides.
The man who loves you is not willing to let you be so sad, so he will sincerely apologize to you.
This is the case with Sun Lei in "The Perfect Partner".
Due to his subjective reluctance and objective carelessness, his abilities were not fully exerted. Even so, Chen Shan still chose to believe him, and even stopped her career to support him.
For her efforts, he is very grateful, and he is willing to put away the original laziness and take over the burden of Supporting Chen Shan's family. However, some unexpected factors have led to his goal never being achieved, and even losing several better jobs in succession.
In order to let Chen Shan live with peace of mind during pregnancy, he chose to hide it. However, paper can never contain fire, so Chen Shan has almost no effort to find the truth.
Chen Shan was disappointed, she felt that he just couldn't support the wall with mud, no matter how good the opportunity given to him, he couldn't grasp it. It's just that she forgets that not everyone can face the invincibility of life like she does.
And Sun Lei, from a good man at home to the point of concealment, is mostly related to her strength. Of course, it will not be said that she is strong and wrong, in the face of the storm of life, we should indeed be strong, so that we can live more confidently. It's just that we can't ask others with this mentality, you know, many lovers end up separating mostly because they want to change each other.
If Sun Lei is a jerk enough, he can choose to stick to the end and let Chen Shan indulge in pain alone. However, he did not do this, but sincerely apologized to Chen Shan.
Not to mention whether Sun Lei's idea is wrong, his broad mind alone has raced many men. And the reason why he is like this is because Chen Shan is his lover.
The triviality and helplessness in the couple make them exhausted. But he was still willing to hold her hand and care for her in his own way.
For this, Chen Shan understood. Therefore, although Sun Lei's approach made her feel very sad, and even had the idea of divorce, in the end she still chose to forgive.
Those women who reap happiness are not because they have a good fate, but because they can get rid of the influence of emotions and face the imperfect man with a kind attitude.
2. Won't slam the door and go away
In film and television dramas, this scene is often seen, and some men will choose to slam the door after the fight, leaving the woman to cry alone in the same place. Even sometimes, women are willing to bow their heads and call him back, and he will just hang up.
This is understandable, after all, there is no willingness to quarrel. Whether it is a man or a woman, in their bones, they still hope that they can talk calmly with each other, rather than just roar without an image.
The problem is that this practice is too hurtful. Being abandoned or ignored by a lover will bring far more harm to a woman than a quarrel.
The women who didn't want to leave the scene of the quarrel even if they were stabbed all over the body were not too eager to win, but that she still loved him, and she didn't want them to become strangers from now on.
There was a popular saying on the Internet to the effect that people were exhorting people to cherish the woman who was willing to argue with you.
Some men understand this. Therefore, he would never slam the door and go, and even under the influence of negative emotions, repeatedly asked himself to calm down and communicate with her in a relatively peaceful tone.
3. Take the initiative to serve soft
Men will have their own little temper, and after being ignited, most of them will choose to support it to the end. But no matter how big a man's temper is, for the woman he likes, he will have no temper in an instant, only because he is not willing to make her sad, only because he feels that the winner of the quarrel is far less important than her happiness.
Therefore, whether they have done it wrong or not, they will choose to be soft, first to rescue her from negative emotions, and then choose to express their thoughts in a relatively euphemistic way.
This is a spineless approach in the eyes of many men. As everyone knows, pride may make him lose the person he loves forever.
Some men do not understand this, but only because they have no love in their hearts, they do not allow their dignity as a man to be questioned, so they ignore her pain and attack her with the most ugly language.
Smart women know that a man's attitude after a quarrel determines her position in his mind. If, after the fight, he sincerely apologizes to her, does not slam the door, and takes the initiative to soften, then it means that he really loves her. For such a man, it is natural to firmly grasp it, after all, it is not easy to find a person who loves himself in the vast sea of people.
Finally, I would like to say that quarrels not only cannot solve the problem, but even hurt the feelings of the two people, so in the process of getting along with our lovers, we should maintain appropriate calm.
END.