Fading away is a slightly sad word.
However, as long as there is a beloved person to accompany you, even in the face of the death of life, there is nothing to be afraid of.
This Douban score of 8.2 points, "Love Before Memory Fades", shows us the warm story of an elderly couple after entering the countdown to life. The male protagonist, John, is an Alzheimer's patient, and he often talks to you one second and forgets where he is the next. As a literature professor who loved Hemingway's work, John's greatest wish in life was to visit hemingway's house. The heroine Ella is a terminal patient of bowel cancer, deeply tormented by the disease, she always shows an optimistic, exquisite and loving side of life in front of everyone.
One is an Alzheimer's patient and the other is a cancer patient. If the life arranged for them by his children is followed, John, who has Alzheimer's disease, will be sent to a nursing home and spend the rest of his life with increasingly blurred memories, while Ella, who is terminally ill with cancer, will also be sent to the hospital for treatment, spending the last days of her life in various chemotherapy drugs and treatment equipment.
Before the memory fades, in the last days of life, in order to live with more dignity, to love again for bravery, for never to be separated from each other. John and Ella embark on a frantic "elopement" life, driving a motorhome called the "Seeker" on their final journey. They traveled south from Massachusetts, looking back on their lives together, and finally arrived at John's dream place, the Hemingway House in Key West.
"We can't be separated" is the most faithful commitment to each other's love. If you have to separate, you must also leave hand in hand with each other's love. John and Ella's love is enviable and desirable. In Love Before Memory Fades, I saw that in john and Ella's love, there was praise, there was passion, there was each other, there was all the beauty of love.
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In the film, when John is lost, Ella describes John this way: "Please, do you see the old man? He was very handsome, very gentlemanly, with beautiful white hair and a neat beard..."
She said to John, "You're my hero. ”
And John, while he was awake, he said, "My princess, how did I marry such a beautiful woman as you..."
When his memory was blurred, he said, "What about my Ella? My Ella is a beauty in her twenties? ”
It can be seen from the lines that John and Ella's praise and appreciation for each other are from the heart, you are my most handsome white-haired prince, I am your most beautiful princess. The so-called lover's eyes out of the West, because the heart is full of love for each other, so the other party is always the most handsome and beautiful, even if the other party because of urinary incontinence wet pants and bed; even if the other party has reached the age of white hair and wrinkles.
Philosopher Zhou Guoping said: "Compared with all love, love based on mutual appreciation is much more reliable." "When you look at the other half with the eyes of praise and appreciation, you will find that the beauty of the other party is like a star, shining and dazzling; and when you see always the flaws of the other party, perhaps it is not that the beauty of the other party has become less, but that your eyes are blinded by dark clouds and ignore the existence of stars.
In fact, the star is still the star, the person is still the person, and the marriage is still the marriage. Beautiful or ugly, it depends on what kind of mentality you use to look at it.
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Does the marriage of an old husband and wife have to be as plain as water? Will the sweetness of marriage always be worn away by chai rice oil and salt?
And John and Ella in "Love Before Memory Fades", even if they are white-haired, sprinkle dog food but do not lose the little couple in love.
They make kissing, holding hands, hugging, and saying I love you a daily habit, giving each other a goodnight kiss before going to bed; driving without forgetting to hold each other's hands; and often saying I love you. I remember the scene when they went to a strange city and stayed in a luxury hotel, they excitedly opened the champagne, the two of them raised a glass to drink, danced together, this dog food picture is envied.
Also, I was impressed by a conversation between John and Ella's children.
The son (Will) told his daughter (Jane) that you couldn't believe what they were doing when I opened my parents' bedroom door that day. They are so old, still "singing in the canyon". Jane replied, "How nice, I wish I could do the same when I'm old, and now my husband only kisses me lightly." ”
It is hard to imagine that in the age of white hair and disease, they still maintain their enthusiasm for life and enthusiasm for love.
Some people say that marriage is the graveyard of love. In fact, to be precise, marriage is the graveyard of people who do not know how to manage love. Whether it is love or marriage, it is necessary to operate together with each other, and maintaining enthusiasm for life and enthusiasm for love is the preservative of marriage. Let the years pass, even in the twilight years, don't forget to express love to each other, don't just stand shoulder to shoulder when you can hold hands, and don't always have your back to back when you can hug.
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In order to retain John's memory, Ella would open her carefully prepared projection every night, play old photos, and reminisce with John about the past, from meeting and getting married, from marriage to pregnancy, from the birth of the child to the growth of the child...
And John, in order not to drag Ella down, when his memory is clear, told Ella: "When you put me in the nursing home, remember to put the gun in my hand, pull your thumb on the trigger, and then explain to me, I made you do it, kiss me, kiss me twice, and then turn away." ”
No matter how good the marriage, there will be 100 thoughts of divorce in a lifetime, and 50 impulses to strangle each other. There are differences, there are contradictions, is the real state of marriage. The secret of running marriage and love is that there is not only yourself in love, but also each other, who know how to stand in the right position and consider each other. When each other can think more about each other, marriage will have less contradictions and more harmony.
At the end of the film, Ella and her husband John ended their lives together, using their lives to explain the best appearance of love to us. "We can't be separated" is their most faithful commitment to each other's love. If you have to separate, you must also leave hand in hand with each other's love. There is no better happiness than: two people in one room, three meals for all seasons, all with your beloved.
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【Mei Xiaohua, share the true feelings with you, but also accompany you to see the false feelings ~】