In the arranged marriages of the old era, Juan is undoubtedly one of the tragic characters, although she married Lu Xun and became his original wife, but Lu Xun did not say a few words to Juan in his life, despite this, Juan still comforted himself at all times, as long as he continued to warm Lu Xun, his heart would always be warmed.
With the combination of Lu Xun and Xu Guangping, all of Zhu An's hopes were shattered, and from then on, Juan lived even more miserable, she waited all her life, but she lived for others all her life, she stayed alone in the empty house for 41 years, but what she waited for was not Lu Xun's change of heart, but a tragedy.
Lu Xun's arranged marriage
Juan was born in July 1879, his father was a businessman at that time, the family is relatively well-off, that is, the family's thinking is more conservative and aging, from childhood to Juan's education is "women without talent is morality", so they not only did not let Juan read, but also used these decadent ideas to influence Juan, so that Juan has formed this deep-rooted thought in his bones, and it is difficult to change it later.
Juan was wrapped in small feet when she was 5 years old, and began to do housework, in terms of doing housework, she is definitely a small expert, everything can do some, but she rarely goes out of the door of her own home, so she has grown up to the age of marriage and marriage, that era marriage is generally relatively small, but Juan has been 23 years old and has not been married, which can make the family anxious, with the family anxious, Juan gradually anxious.
Seeing that Juan had grown up and had always been in close contact with the Zhu family, Mrs. Lu was very satisfied with Juan, and she liked this kind of obedient and sensible woman, so in the second year that Lu Xun had just gone to Nanjing to study, Mrs. Lu took it upon herself to get engaged to the Zhu family and betrothed Lu Xun and Zhu An's marriage.
After Lu Xun heard about this incident, he made two demands, the first was to ask Juan to put his feet on his feet, and the second was to ask Juan to go to school to read. Logically, in terms of the Zhu family's family situation, it was completely no problem to let Zhu An go to school, but they were too influenced by feudal ideas at that time, and they always believed that "a woman without talent is moral", so they did not take Lu Xun's request as the same thing, and it was this move that directly led to the gap between Zhu An and Lu Xun that could never be crossed later.
After the engagement, Juan has been looking forward to Lu Xun coming back to marry himself as soon as possible, but year after year rushes by, Lu Xun has never returned to become a relative, until the fifth year after the engagement, Lu Xun's mother really can't stand it, so she pretended to be ill and tricked Lu Xun, who was studying in Japan, back and became a relative with Juan.
Lu Xun inexplicably came back, as soon as he arrived home, he found that the bride was waiting for him to become a parent, which made him realize that he was deceived, but everything was already too late, Lu Xun watched Juan come out of the flower car, at first he saw a pair of large shoes sticking out, and thought that Juan obeyed his two requests, and put it down, but soon Juan fell because the small foot could not wear this kind of big shoes, Lu Xun immediately elongated his face after seeing it, and the atmosphere was very awkward.
Perhaps from this moment on, there was already an insurmountable gap between Lu Xun and Juan, and this gap was not only a gap in thinking, but also a disappointment in the disrespect that Lu Xun demanded. Although Lu Xun cooperated with his mother and Juan to get married, but that night he was unwilling to enter the cave room, nor did he want to say a word to Juan, just like that, he kept a stiff face and did not say a word, Juan urged him several times to rest, Lu Xun was still indifferent, the next day he moved out to live on his own, from then on, for 41 years, Juan was alone in the empty house.
Juan thought there was a turnaround
After getting married, Lu Xun went to school again, rarely returned home, and only Juan was left at home to take care of his mother, until Lu Xun returned to China to work, and then took the family to live with him, including Juan, of course. During the time when the family lived together, Juan seemed to have a clue, she went to find Zhou Zuoren, asked Zhou Zuoren to teach herself to read, Zhou Zuoren happily agreed to Zhu An, but unfortunately, this matter was not resolved later, Juan still could not read, missed the opportunity to open Lu Xun's heart.
Later, Lu Xun planned to take his mother and Zhou Zuoren to live separately, so he asked Zhu An whether he wanted to go back to his mother's house or stay with Zhou Zuoren and them. At that time, Lu Xun did not give Juan another choice, that is, he hoped that Juan could leave himself, but Juan chose the choice that Lu Xun did not give, and she wanted to continue to be with Lu Xun and them, responsible for taking care of Lu Xun and Mrs. Lu.
Lu Xun had no way to refuse Juan, he could only continue to move with Juan, during that time, Lu Xun moved many times, Juan thought that Lu Xun would start a new life with himself every time, so after moving, he would try his best to decorate the new home beautifully, and at the same time deliberately dressed himself up, but every time it ended in disappointment, Lu Xun still did not look at Juan more, nor did he say a word to her.
In fact, this period of time should be the best time for the relationship between Juan and Lu Xun to ease, but unfortunately, in the end, Juan still did not change himself, and Lu Xun was never touched by Juan's affection, because what he needed did not seem to be Juan's meticulous care and care.
A lifetime of waiting in exchange for a tragedy
Time passed quickly, and soon after, Lu Xun met the student Xu Guangping, Xu Guangping often came to Lu Xun's home as a guest, the two talked and laughed, Juan prepared something for them every day, and also made tea for Xu Guangping, but Xu Guangping seemed to be the same as Lu Xun, and looked at Juan with colored glasses who had no knowledge and culture.
During this time, Juan was undoubtedly sad, because she had never seen Lu Xun have such a good face for herself, nor had she ever heard Lu Xun say so many words, at that moment, perhaps Juan had realized how things would develop. Sure enough, soon after, Lu Xun moved out to live with Xu Guangping, and Xu Guangping was already pregnant at that time.
Old Mrs. Lu, who had been standing on Juan's side, heard that Xu Guangping was pregnant and had been looking forward to holding her grandson, and she actually cared a little more about Xu Guangping, and this change in attitude undoubtedly aggravated Juan's inner grief, but no one would care about what Juan thought, only Juan himself suffered all the pain.
By this time, Juan had completely despaired of Lu Xun's marriage with herself, but she had no way to leave the house, because she didn't know where she could go after leaving, and what could she do? Many years later, Lu Xun died of illness, and Mrs. Lu also died, leaving Zhu An alone, helpless, childless, and living a miserable life.
Before Mrs. Lu died, she specially told Zhou Zuoren to give zhuan the living expenses he gave every month to ensure juan's life, but unfortunately this money was not enough for juan to live, although Xu Guangping would also give juan some living expenses, but these were all cups of water, and Juan was living in deep water at that time.
In order to be able to make a living, Juan had to plan to sell some of the books left by Lu Xun, but he was blocked by Xu Guangping and Lu Xun's friends, and in the midst of grief and despair, Juan shouted out a sentence: "I am also a relic of Lu Xun, and you must also save me", this sentence is Juan's rare cry, but it interprets her tragic life to the fullest, making people can't help but cry after seeing it.
In those last days, Juan lived an embarrassing and helpless life, and when she died in 1947, she also wrote to Xu Guangping and made her last request in life, hoping that Xu Guangping would bury herself next to Lu Xun, but unfortunately even the last request was rejected.
epilogue
Juan's life is a desolate life, but also a life persecuted by the old society, but also a life poisoned by arranged marriages, many people will think that Lu Xun is too desperate, will not answer Tou an, in fact, what is not wrong with Zhu An, who has been waiting all his life? If she had understood the essence of her marriage to Lu Xun earlier and gradually become independent like Zhang Youyi, perhaps this tragedy would have come to an abrupt end!
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