-01-
In the past, Han Shan asked, "What should the world do when the world defiles me, deceives me, insults me, despises me, despises me, hates me, and slanders me?" ”
He said, "Then bear with him, by him, by him, by him, by him, by him, by him, and in a few years you will see him!" ”
In life, many people, there is a characteristic, that is, when they meet people they don't like, they will immediately make a judgment that this person is not good, so they have not yet had deep contact, so they will block the other party and delete it.
There are also many people who always look at others with a critical eye, but do not feel that while you are critical of others, you are already exposing your shortcomings.
People, the higher their emotional intelligence, the more they can find advantages in others.
Just like an article, everyone reads out different ideas, different tastes, different opinions, different views, and the conclusions obtained will be different.
So-called, for people to deal with the world must be calm, a lot of impulsive words and deeds, will make you regret it later.
People live, often the more you can hold your breath, the more you can grasp the initiative.
Therefore, when you are not accustomed to a person, the best posture is: do not say absolutely, do not do everything.
-02-
In fact, everyone will have the seeds of anger at any time.
Therefore, when encountering people and things that are not accustomed to it, impatient, and can't stand it, they will inevitably sprout and grow that seed, and finally vent it to others.
However, in this world, gold has no feet, and no one is perfect.
When you are not accustomed to others, it is actually possible that you are doing the same thing as others, even more excessively than the other party.
Therefore, sometimes, not being accustomed to others is a kind of rejection of oneself, because you do not want to become the same person as the other party, so you will accumulate an emotion in your heart.
In this life, when people find their own reasons in advance, they can avoid some impulsive accidents.
To leave enough room for people, in order to save face for themselves, to save enough face for others, in fact, it is to save face for themselves.
There is a saying called "be strict with others, be lenient with yourself", which is the truth.
Always keeping your eyes on others, on the one hand, it exposes your heart, on the other hand, it also allows others to see your unstable side of the world.
Your evil words and deeds, your impulsiveness, your criticism of others, and your wanton accusations are all your inner humility and resentment.
Therefore, not saying absolutely, not doing everything, downplaying a criticism, giving others objective and a sense of proportion, is to accumulate virtue and happiness for yourself.
-03-
Of course, some people will say that words cannot be tolerated, and to endure is to admit it.
However, it is not the same thing to have a way of admitting and acting in a way, and to have a sense of proportion for others. Admitting encouragement is that you can't surpass others, so you give up your own motivation to move forward, and forbearance is a person who is finding his own reason and finding his own direction.
The so-called truth is actually a person's inner evaluation of a thing, or a view of a person.
However, if you can't control your emotions, when the flesh and blood are gushing, you do things as a person, and you lose your original calm, then you will also cut off the back road for yourself, and you will find that you may be able to say: you could have a friend, and at the moment, you have set up an enemy for yourself.
Life is impermanent, and things change.
A lot of things, in an instant, will be unexpected.
If you do things too desperately and speak too badly, you will lose the room for maneuver in the future, and you will also let yourself get along with others and fall into an embarrassing situation.
Just like the following chess, leave yourself a good backhand, let yourself go in and out freely, in order not to let your chessboard into a stalemate.
Some people like to do things "broken", but they don't know, many things, endure, maybe will "willow dark flowers bright another village".
The road of life, most of the time, is not within your control, and the decisions you make in the case of unseemly situations have most of the time blocked your own way.
Therefore, we do things as people, we must know how to leave blank, just like danqing paintings, appropriate blanks, more beautiful, but also more so that a painting is not messy, staggered.
-04-
Some people's lack of calmness is actually the overflow of inner jealousy and uneasiness.
Therefore, they will speak harshly and do cruel things.
For example, people in the same position, some people have higher incomes than themselves, are loved by leaders, appreciated by colleagues, so they begin to speak evil words, make trouble behind their backs, and do all the bad things.
If you can't turn around and let yourself intersect with others, then in the days to come, what you are doing now will probably not bring you any benefit.
Be clear, your words and deeds are in the eyes of others, when you do something desperate, how can other people not see, and how can they not know?
The consequence of your doing so is that you will let your original accumulated blessings also stay away from you, so that your original accumulated popularity will not want to come closer to you.
Therefore, be a person to leave a line, and see each other in the future.
People live and show not how smooth you are, but how generous you can be.
The wider the human heart, the more tolerant the heart, the more able it can pave a smoother road for itself, and the more you can see the wider sky.
-05-
The source of many conflicts between people lies in the absence of empathy.
Either driven by interests, or by personality, the unevenness of interests will make a person lose his mind, and the adventurousness of his character will make a person angry.
In short, everything is the result of self-righteousness.
If when something happens, he can know how to think in a different position, and can think more about others, so much and half, he will calm down and reduce the occurrence of friction.
However, if you always impose your own habits on others, wishful thinking that you are right, and do not like everything about others, it is difficult to control your own life, because you will be controlled by emotions.
Therefore, when you want to be angry, try to calm yourself down, resist the desire to be angry, and tell yourself that you must be calm and tit-for-tat, which will only make the contradiction deeper and deeper, and eventually hurt others and hurt yourself.
Learn to forgive, do not relentlessly accuse others, the other party does not care, but also more than endless, for a while, will only expose your bitter, mean, narrow heart.
Everything is caused by a word "dispute".
When you want to get angry, think about it: a moment of anger does not mean that you can really win.
-06-
Life is a long road, often thirty years of Hexi, thirty years of Hedong.
So, don't live so anxious, restless, many things, "and" is the most expensive and the most rare.
Changing your state of mind and making your heart soft can also change your attitude. Feel that others are not right, speak euphemistically, criticize others, leave three points, let others correct; think others are great, praise and leave three points, let others be more progressive.
Only when people live, let themselves live quietly and open-mindedly, can they find themselves at ease; only when they get along with people, they are less angry and less impetuous, and only then can they have a peaceful state of mind.
Mencius once said: Heaven and time, geographical advantages, people and people.
The so-called "people" is whether you can face the disturbances and uphold the "peace" as the most precious mind with the right attitude.
The world is constantly squabbling, many things, fighting to the end, but it is just a gossip or joke, so, fighting around, not necessarily to get, but to lose more.
For example, watching "The Biography of Zhen Huan", the women are constantly arguing, all kinds of conspiracies and tricks, which make people dazzling, but in the end, who really got what? On the contrary, those who know "moderation" and "indisputatibility" live the most peacefully.
Therefore, to persuade you to get along with people, not to say everything, not to do things in a desperate way, to maintain harmony, to seek common ground while reserving differences, is the most top way for people to live in the world, the top cultivation and get along.
Author, Frank Fox
Figure, network
May you find in my words the ordinary years, a strong affection! Thanks for your attention!