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As long as you walk straight, you are not ashamed.
01
Stay away from the villains, stay away from right and wrong.
Let's start with a story.
Emperor Taizong of Tang asked Xu Jingzong:
"Among the civil and military officials of the Manchu Dynasty, you are the most capable one, but there are still people who constantly talk about your mistakes in front of me.
Xu Jingzong replied:
"The spring rain is as expensive as oil, and the farmer loves it because it nourishes the crops, but the walkers hate it because the spring rain makes the road muddy and difficult to walk; the autumn moon shines in all directions like a bright mirror, and the talented and beautiful people joyfully appreciate the moon and chant poetry, but the thieves hate it, afraid of illuminating their ugly deeds."
The omnipotent Heaven cannot satisfy everyone, let alone me as an ordinary person? I did not use fat sheep wine to reconcile right and wrong, and besides, the words of right and wrong should not be listened to, and after hearing them, they should not be spread.
A king who blindly listens to his subjects may be killed; a father who blindly listens to his son may be condemned to death; a husband and wife may be abandoned when they hear rumors; friends may break off relations when they listen to rumors; relatives may be alienated when they hear rumors; and neighbors may become angry when they listen to rumors.
Life has a seven-foot-tall body, and it is necessary to be cautious about the rumors heard, there is a dragon spring sword on the tongue, and there is no blood for killing. Who hasn't said anything in front of people? Which person is not commented on behind the scenes?
Tang Taizong said, "You spoke very well, I will remember!" ”
It is true that it is impossible for a person to please everyone, but as long as everything is done according to the right path and is not ashamed, others do not need to pay attention to the gossip.
If a person realizes this, he will naturally save himself a lot of troubles. This should also be a reference and reference for us to deal with people in real life.
As long as you walk straight and have no shame, you don't have to pay attention to the comments of others.
02
The Northern Song Dynasty once had two prime ministers, one named Sima Guang and the other named Wang Anshi.
The two men differed by a hundred and eighteen thousand miles, one conservative and the other reformist.
Later, Wang Anshi won and gained real power, and Sima Guang was ousted from the throne of prime minister.
At this time, the emperor asked Wang Anshi about his views on Sima Guang, but wang Anshi praised him greatly, calling Sima Guang "the pillar of the country", and giving him a high evaluation of his character, ability, and literary achievements.
Because of this, although Sima Guang lost the trust of the emperor, he did not fall into a tragic situation because of the fall of power, and was able to calmly "retreat from the rivers and lakes", chant poems, and eat gold.
A dog has his day. The so-called thirty years of Hedong, thirty years of Hexi.
Because Wang Anshi's forceful implementation of reforms attracted too many attacks, the emperor had to remove him from his post on the spot and reappointed Sima Guang as prime minister.
At this time, many people told the emperor about Wang Anshi's black form. The emperor listened to rumors and wanted to cure Wang Anshi of his sins and seek Sima Guang's advice.
Unexpectedly, Sima Guang did not fall into the well, but earnestly told the emperor: Wang Anshi was jealous and hateful, open-minded and loyal, and His Majesty must not listen to rumors.
After listening to Sima Guang's evaluation of Wang Anshi, the emperor said a word: Qing and other gentlemen are also gentlemen!
This is it: the gentleman's battle is frank.
What is the biggest difference between a gentleman and a villain?
The gentleman's style is: only bury his head in doing things and solving problems, and do not talk about right and wrong and be a person. Right things are not right people, just things are discussed.
The characteristics of villains are: they do not talk about the problem itself, but they like to point fingers at people. Good at targeting people, good at personal attacks, but don't want to solve the problem.
Gentlemen are "harmonious and different", even though I disagree with you, but I absolutely respect your personality, outside of things are still friends.
The villain is "the same but not harmonious", on the surface likes to be polite, but in fact, he does not agree with you ten thousand times in his heart, and he secretly makes a bad impression on you at the right time, which is a very despicable personality.
What is the villain's most ruthless move?
Before attacking a person, they will try to put a hat on the person's head, label him, and deny the person in terms of character and morality, so that all his explanations are pale.
This is actually the best strategy for the art of war: to cut down the plot of the soldiers, and to curse the people first.
Therefore, I would rather offend and make enemies of gentlemen. Don't please a "villain", and you are even more unwilling to accept the kindness of a villain.
A word to everyone: stay away from villains, stay away from right and wrong.
Only solve problems, do not argue with others!
Respect everyone who is willing to solve problems, including your enemies!
03
A few more words to you, may you do this!
I chose to be generous, not because I was clumsy.
Because I understand
Virtue can carry things, help others can be happy.
I choose to be good, not to be weak.
Goodness is nature, and evil will be punished.
I choose to give in, not that I flinch.
Endure the calm of the wind and waves, let the sky be high and the sea wide.
I choose to be tolerant, not my cowardice.
Tolerance is a virtue, and there is nothing wrong with virtue.
I choose to be confused, not that I am really confused.
Just don't want to think about it
Thus generous response, rare confusion, laughing at the world.
I choose to be sincere, and I speak directly when I have something to say.
Flattery against the heart is to cope, and advice against the ear is responsible.
I choose to forgive, not that I am unprincipled.
Forgive and forgive, and you can't do anything to the end.
I'm serious about righteousness, not that I'm too persistent.
Because I can't give up that fate
Don't want to hide your inner feelings.