Note: This article is based on the original novel of "Xiao Min Jia", and the picture is derived from the "Xiao Min Jia" TV series.
The two daughters of the Liu family, Liu Xiaomin and Liu Xiaojie, divorced successively.
Liu Mother Wang Sumin said to her youngest daughter Liu Xiaojie: "We are an ordinary family, don't be too high in heart, the moon in the sky is good, we can't reach it." When I didn't let your sister come to Beijing, she didn't listen, now it's good, spelling forks. ”
Liu Xiaojie asked, "What is spelling forks?" ”
Mother Liu couldn't say it.
In the original work of "Xiao Minjia", it is written: "Spelling fork is the dialect of the hometown, which means similar to: 姘頭. Not a legal couple, but like a husband and wife, it is about equal to a lover. A good family woman like Wang Sumin, who has been able to sit upright all her life. Morally, it is not worth fighting for forks. ”
Liu Xiaomin listened to these words condemning "misbehaving" men and women, and her heart was very uncomfortable, but she felt in her heart that her mother was not wrong, spelling forks, saying that it was better to listen, and calling boyfriend and girlfriend.
Liu Xiaomin, 40, and Chen Zhuo live in secret, and for the relationship between the two, Liu Xiaomin said: "As long as you can hide, you can hide as long as you want." ”
Obviously, both are single, but they live like "concubines", and Liu Xiaomin and Chen Zhuo's "underground love" tells the hidden pain of 40-year-old men and women.
Liu Xiaomin had a marriage, her ex-husband Jin Bo made a mistake of principle, Liu Xiaomin left home and went north in a huff, fighting alone in Beijing, and broke out of a career.
His son, Jin Jiajun, stayed in his hometown and lived with Jin Bo, which led to the cold estrangement of Liu Xiaomin and Jin Jiajun's mother-son relationship.
Chen Zhuo also divorced once, his ex-wife Li Ping was strong and arrogant, and he did not look up to Chen Zhuo, who did nothing, Li Ping abandoned Chen Zhuo, climbed another high branch, and married Hong Wei, who was more golden.
Daughter Chen Jiajia inherited the bad temper of her mother Li Ping and is difficult to get along with.
Liu Xiaomin and Chen Zhuo, their respective failed marriages, have left a mess, and the original book of "Xiao Min's Family" writes:
For remarriage, she and Chen Zhuo are very cautious. The second is to enter the city, it is not as easy as now, standing on the edge of the siege, attacking and retreating. They all pay more attention to spiritual communication. The most difficult two years were Chen Zhuo who accompanied her. ”
The failure of the first marriage, more or less, has left some shadows on Liu Xiaomin and Chen Zhuo, both of whom lack the confidence to remarry, rather than being consumed by chai rice oil and salt, it is better to only fall in love and not get married.
After Liu Xiaomin divorced, she did not plan to be a housewife, her career is very critical at present, and the muddy waters of marriage, Liu Xiaomin does not want to travel again.
The original work of "Xiao Minjia" wrote: "Their relationship was originally a last resort, but fortunately, there are not a few such relationships now." She and Chen Zhuo's common friend Old Qian, with his girlfriend for nine years did not get married, and then made up his mind to surface, ready to get married, trouble has come, the house, children, the elderly, relatives, old money and girlfriend are a bit unable to go on. It's hard to dive any further. Originally, marriage can also be divorced, and this kind of seeming nothingness may be longer. ”
Remarriage means the superposition of tedious relationships.
Liu Xiaomin wants to be a stepmother, Chen Zhuo wants to be a stepmother, and the parents of both sides want to be mixed in, and when people reach middle age, they want to do more than subtraction, rather than addition.
Liu Xiaomin said: "When people reach middle age, they don't find trouble for themselves, and they really have feelings, and they don't get married or get married." ”
Liu Xiaomin, 40 years old, lives a transparent life.
Liu Xiaomin and Chen Zhuo, the reason why they secretly love and live together, but not publicly, is a very important reason - Li Ping.
In the original work of "Xiao Min's Family", it is mentioned that Li Ping is Liu Xiaomin's sister, and the friendship between the two is not deep, but Liu Xiaomin knows Chen Zhuo through Li Ping.
Li Ping did not know that her sister Liu Xiaomin would "pick up the man she didn't want."
Li Ping and Chen Zhuo divorced, it was Li Ping who took the initiative to propose, Li Ping voluntarily left the house, Chen Zhuo was ruthlessly abandoned; later, by chance, Chen Zhuo sought acupuncture from Liu Xiaomin, who was practicing medicine, and the two developed feelings and became boyfriend and girlfriend.
In the original book of "Xiao MinJia", it is written: "She met Chen Zhuo. How many years had not been in touch, and when they met again, she knew they were divorced. Chen Zhuo's back nerves were beating, and it was her patient. The time of the reunion was just right. ”
Li Ping is a ruthless character who cannot be forgiven, and Liu Xiaomin, who has a gentle temperament, is not Li Ping's opponent at all.
If the relationship is open, Li Ping will inevitably make a big fuss.
Liu Xiaomin and Chen Zhuo are bright and honest, and they are not ashamed, but it is difficult to guarantee that the suspicious Li Ping will not think wildly, and sure enough, Li Ping found a private detective to check Chen Zhuo, and Liu Xiaomin was exposed.
After learning that Liu Xiaomin and Chen Zhuo were living together, Li Ping made a big fuss, slandered Chen Zhuo for "cheating in marriage", and almost sued Chen Zhuo for re-division of property.
After reading the original work of "Xiao Min Jia", I found that Liu Xiaomin is a kind and generous woman, she takes the overall situation into account, takes the initiative to take on a lot of responsibilities that do not belong to herself, and the reason why she does not disclose her relationship with Chen Zhuo has elements for Li Ping to consider.
Although Li Ping formed a new family, but when she learned that her ex-husband and her sister were together, her heart would inevitably be uncomfortable, and Liu Xiaomin came from the heart and did not want to hurt Li Ping.
Especially after learning that Li Ping had lost her child and had no hope of getting pregnant again, Liu Xiaomin was more cautious, afraid that her happiness would stimulate Li Ping.
Liu Xiaomin's ex-husband, Jin Bo, also obstructed Liu Xiaomin and Chen Zhuo from remarrying.
Jin Bo sent his son Jin Jiajun to Beijing to study in order to supervise Liu Xiaomin, and secretly brokered a connection between Jin Bo and Liu Xiaomin, trying to reconcile the two.
Jin Bo has a rogue posture, this kind of person is the most difficult to entangle, and only by stabilizing Jin Bo can he keep his family peaceful.
Jin Bo's life in his hometown was very unsatisfactory, the family was ruined, and nothing was achieved, while his ex-wife Liu Xiaomin not only sang in his career, but also ushered in the spring emotionally, in contrast, Jin Bo's frustration was even more obvious.
When Jin Bo betrayed the marriage, Liu Xiaomin had no room for forgiveness, but he was Jin Jiajun's father after all, and there was such a layer of constant relationship, Liu Xiaomin had feelings for Jin Bo.
A low-key relationship is a respect for their respective exs.
In the year of confusion, there are old and small, more important than love, more important is responsibility.
Involuntariness is the greatest pain for middle-aged people.
After Li Ping married Hong Wei, she was still desperately trying to have children at the age of 40, and her daughter Chen Jiajia was in adolescence, feeling abandoned by her mother, and willfully forced her father Chen Zhuo not to marry again.
In order to take care of his daughter's emotions, Chen Zhuo had to promise her, Chen Zhuo, who was once Chen Jiajia's only dependence.
Chen Jiajia knew that Chen Zhuo and Liu Xiaomin were in love, and deliberately tricked Liu Xiaomin, and together with his good friend Jin Jiajun, he locked Liu Xiaomin in the warehouse.
Chen Zhuo anxiously shouted the name of "Liu Xiaomin", and Jin Jiajun learned that he had done something wrong, and the person who locked it was his mother, so Jin Jiajun and Chen Jiajia had a fight.
The two children's attitudes towards the remarriage of their parents are very different, but the essence is surprisingly consistent.
Jin Jiajun has been with his grandmother and father for many years, and his love for his mother is both strange and longing.
Growing up in a single-parent family, Jin Jiajun was particularly precocious and sensible, he supported Liu Xiaomin to make a boyfriend, but also supported her to marry and have children, and even the tuition that Liu Xiaomin gave him, he had to pay back.
He didn't want to interfere in anyone's life, and he didn't want to owe anyone anything.
Chen Jiajia, on the other hand, expressed her resistance to her parents in a wayward way.
After Chen Jiajia learned that her mother was pregnant, she cursed her for not being able to give birth to a child, and Chen Jiajia's "viciousness" allowed Chen Zhuo to see the gap in her daughter's heart.
In the original work of "Xiao MinJia", it is written: "No longer married, no longer fertile, Chen Zhuo dare not guarantee in his heart, and he himself cannot eat accurately." But at this moment, he praised himself, at least he was prescient, and handled his relationship with Liu Xiaomin very well. Just be boyfriend and girlfriend. There is no burden on each other. No more contradictions will be triggered. It also gives Jiajia a relatively stable and peaceful home. ”
Both children, both lack love and insecurity.
In order to take care of the child's mental health, Liu Xiaomin and Chen Zhuo cannot remarry without consideration.
The two people who would rather be misunderstood as "concubines" than enter the marriage are actually people with a heavy sense of responsibility, love is only a small part of life, and children are the weakness of middle-aged people.
Marriage, for many people, one is to pass on the generations, and the other is to have someone to accompany for the rest of their lives.
Liu Xiaomin and Chen Zhuo already have children and have no plans to have children again, so marriage is not very important to the two of them.
Liu Xiaomin and Chen Zhuo have a special dating place, the two call it "Runaway Residence", "Xiao Min Family" in the original book wrote:
"When people reach middle age, they all know how to enjoy life better. Dealing with the troubles of the original family and the small family, but also juggling the work, is enough of a headache. And here, they give each other comfort and encouragement, which is their safe haven, a little paradise. Only they themselves know. ”
Men and women in 40 years old also long for emotional sustenance and desire sex.
The "underground love" of this middle-aged couple tells the hidden pain that is difficult for 40-year-old men and women to say.
XiaoYaoju gave Liu Xiaomin and Chen Zhuo the opportunity to vent their pressure.
Middle-aged people, as the pillars of the family, their identity is parents, children, husbands, and wives, but they cannot be themselves.
The original work of "Xiao MinJia" portrays the restraint and reality of middle-aged people to the fullest.
But Liu Xiaomin's unexpected pregnancy directly pushed the relationship between the two to the point where she had to "see the light".
Liu Xiaomin and Chen Zhuo are both relatively successful in their careers, materially secure, and it is not difficult to raise another child, so the two decided to keep this child.
For the sake of the children, Liu Xiaomin and Chen Zhuo received a marriage license.
The life of middle-aged people, in addition to a place of chicken feathers, there are all kinds of accidents.
The original work of "Xiao Min Family" mentioned that Chen Zhuo found a terminal illness, Liu Xiaomin was overly sad and did not keep the child, but the relationship between the two withstood the test of suffering.
Chen Zhuo did not abandon Liu Xiaomin because he had no children; Liu Xiaomin did not abandon Chen Zhuo because he was ill.
Husbands and wives can legitimately take care of and care; male and female friends are unable to do so.
When people reach middle age, husband and wife are more like partners fighting side by side, and with that piece of paper, Liu Xiaomin has a deeper understanding of the meaning of marriage.
But how difficult it is for Liu Xiaomin and Chen Zhuo to come this way is like people drinking water, cold and warm self-knowledge.