Wen \ Jiang Zuo Mei Niang
Stills from "Love in the Time of Cholera"
Zhang Ailing once wrote in "Red Roses and White Roses" that a man has two women in his life, one is his white rose and the other is his red rose. One is a holy wife and the other is a passionate mistress. Marrying the former, the white is a grain of rice stick on his clothes, and the latter becomes a cinnabar mole on his heart. Marry the latter, and over time, the red will become a touch of mosquito blood on the wall, and the former will become the "bright moonlight in front of the bed".
Marrying or not marrying is not the focus, in fact, what really creates "red roses" and "white roses" is terrible time and unwillingness in the heart.
Later, Li Bihua wrote such a thing in "Green Snake", every woman also hopes that she has two men in her life, Xu Xian and Fahai.
Fahai is the golden lacquer god who uses every means to win her occasional favor, and can also make her look up to The Height, Xu Xian is a beautiful teenager who can hold hands with her and draw her eyebrows, and can say the best words to iron her soul.
Then if Fahai surrendered to her, she would feel that he was strong and sluggish, incomprehensible and gentle, and wasted his efforts; but if Xu Xian arrived, she would feel that he did not say a word accurately, did not have a strong action, and did not look like a man at all.
What you get is always to be disliked, and what you don't get is always to be grumpy, this is human nature, regardless of gender.
Fermina, the heroine of Márquez's book" in "Love in the Time of Cholera", also has two men in her life:
The "poor boy" Alyssa loves her to the bone, like Fahai, the light of the world.
Dr. Urbino, the "rich and handsome", has status and talent, and like Xu Xian, is the salt of the world.
Neither one will be abandoned, so how did Fermina choose?
Re-reading "Love in the Time of Cholera", which 2 billion people have read and hailed as "the greatest love novel ever written by mankind", I found that love and marriage are far more complicated than imagined, and the works of the masters can always reach the most subtle places of human nature, but just like this, maybe if you really understand it, you can see through the love and marriage thing.
This is the greatness of Márquez, the analysis of human nature and love in this encyclopedia of marriage and love, the nuanced insight into secular marriage, and the laying out of various forms of love, which will surely lead you to find the answer.
As long as you patiently listen to Mei Niang's interpretation.
When the male protagonist, Alyssa, the postman, went to the Gospel Garden to deliver the letter, he accidentally saw Fermina in front of the window.
"It was this fortuitous glimpse that became the source of this earth-shattering love that has not ended half a century later."
He saw her as the goddess of the corolla: "Slowly, he idealized her, attributing all the impossible virtues and imaginary emotions to her. Two weeks later, he had thought of nothing but her. ”
He wrote love letters to confess, played the violin for her, and pretended to read poetry books in the shade of trees every day to wait for her to pass by.
His melancholy, romantic poetic temperament also attracted Fermina.
Fermina's father, an upstart, wanted his daughter to marry into high society, so he took her on a tour in an attempt to separate them.
The two were uncompromising, often sending telegrams to exchange information and agreeing to wait for Fermina to return and get married.
But two years later, Fermina changed her mind.
The reason is that Alyssa thinks that the "ghostwriter porch" is depraved and dirty, and Fermina should not come, and he says: "This is not where the goddess of the corolla should come." ”
Just this sentence made her understand that in his heart, she was just a fantasy flower crown goddess, not eating human fireworks. Maybe he didn't love her, but an illusion he had imagined, and here you can't help but say that Fermina is quite rational, because the same sentence, if other girls hear it, maybe it is more touching, and the iron heart wants to marry Alyssa!
The real Alyssa is indeed not the handsome and brave young man she imagined. Alyssa is melancholy and romantic, much like Xu Zhimo.
Xu once fanatically pursued Lin Huiyin, and Lin Huiyin was as sober as Fermina: "Xu Zhimo's love is not me at all, but Lin Huiyin that he imagined with the romantic emotions of a poet." ”
Women full of wisdom are all the same, you see, they are so clear-headed when fanatical love comes.
I once read a passage in Zhihu, which probably meant that he was originally glowing all over his body, but suddenly it dimmed and became a speck of dust, and I tried to recall that his whole body was light, but I couldn't think of it. It wasn't until later that I found out that it was the light in my eyes when I saw him.
Yes, the first time we fell in love with someone, so unforgettable and memorable, but only because that person had our own highlights for him.
One day the light was extinguished, and the man fell into the mortal world.
The male protagonist, Dr. Urbino, is Fermina's ideal marriage partner: he is from a famous family, graduated with a doctorate, has a meritorious cholera control, has a car and a house, is tall and handsome, and talks elegantly.
With him, Fermina can get: the support of her father, the envy of her sisters, the leap of classes, the jealousy of others.
But after marriage, Fermina found that she had to endure a picky mother-in-law, a foolish sister-in-law, the rules of high society, and eat eggplant that she didn't like...
She complained that she was a "graceful and luxurious maid", and after her husband cheated, she also doubted her choice: "Security, harmony and happiness, these things, once added together, may seem to be love, and they are almost equal to love, but they are not love after all." 」 ”
She began to miss the benefits of Alyssa, what if she had married him in the first place? Wouldn't it be happier?
You see, in fact, not only men will have external hearts, women are the same, but cheating is human nature, loyalty is the choice.
Fermina eventually chose her husband, and dispelled her desire to reconcile with her first love.
Then, you don't say, their later days are more and more favored by fate, Dr. Urbino took her on a tour, and when she returned, her mother-in-law died, and she would not encounter the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, and then they moved into a new villa, and she became more and more satisfied and cherished.
They had quarreled because they had not put soap in the bathroom for a few days, and they had made a fuss because of Urbino's leg splitting, but now they were more and more eager to be together, more and more eager to hold each other's hands, and old age made them weak, and they hugged each other tighter and more dependent on each other.
The doctor said to the heroine on his deathbed: "Only God knows how much I love you." "But does he really love her?"
Yes, fifty years of companionship will not be false, and the last companionship will be really visible.
See if you love her, why are you cheating? Maybe it's too simplistic to judge whether a marriage is happy or not. Long life, changeable human nature, the desire to disappear, sometimes is it normal to wipe a gun and take a fire?
In the end, it was Urbino who broke the essence of marriage: "The most important thing in marriage is not happiness, but stability." This statement is not pessimistic.
I think what he really means is that every moment in a marriage is happy, and that's impossible, but as long as the marriage can be stabilized and persevered, then you will be able to usher in new happiness after you have crossed the unhappiness.
Marriage is like shoes, some people feel grinding their feet, they throw away new shoes, some people put on Band-Aids, continue to wear, sometimes, wear more and more through the like.
Or Zhang Ailing said well: "In the world, there is no emotion, it is not full of holes." "Yes, a good marriage is not at all because of how happy it is, but because it overcomes boredom.
All marriages that persist to the end can never be as glorious as at the wedding, but it must be warm, intimate and down-to-earth, just like you are back in the arms of your mother.
Maybe the beginning of the marriage is wrong, but the marriage can be long-lasting, but it is because the mistake is wrong and then the negative is positive.
The meaning of first love to us is to let us have the beauty of memories, and the meaning of marriage to us is a lifetime of companionship.
How far is the first love, so it can always be beautiful, how close the marriage is, outsiders see the gorgeous robe, they can't see you being bitten by lice and squeaking.
The advantage of looking at famous works is that the master will take you to a height that you have not reached, and then you reach this height, and you will "see the mountains and small". Want to see the truth about love and marriage as much as I do, so that I can better harness it? Let's take a look at this book.
Love during the cholera period is ¥55 to buy
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I am Mei Niang, you have a story I have wine, let's talk about life together, click on the above attention, welcome to my world.