Speaking of King Hui of Zhou, it can only be described in two words: absurd, and slamming the door.
How ridiculous is King Zhou Hui? In the first year of being the Son of Heaven, Duke Yu and Duke Xian of Jin came to worship. King Hui of Zhou disregarded the etiquette of the monarch and called the two brothers and brothers.
Hello brothers, five heads, six six shun.
While drinking, King Hui of Zhou sent five pairs of jade and four BMWs to each of them, and finally specially let the two princes live in the Tianzi Suite.
The ministers said: The princes can live in the VIP room, how can they live in the Tianzi Suite? Unruly!
Zhou Huiwang said: I like it!
In fact, King Hui of Zhou had only one purpose in laying down his blood, to let Duke Yu and Duke Xian of Jin give him a matchmaker.
Subsequently, Duke Yu and Duke Xian of Jin took Zheng Ligong by the way and went to Chen Guo to welcome back The daughter of Marquis Chen as queen, that is, Empress Dowager Zhou.
Just after getting married, King Hui of Zhou thought to himself: A manly husband, first start a family and then establish a business, now it is time to do great things.
The first major thing that King Hui of Zhou did was to seize the vegetable garden of the concubine country to raise wild boars.
Concubine Hou said: Heavenly Son, people have just planted cabbage, you can't let the pigs arch!
King Hui of Zhou said: Don't give it, right? I'm mad!
Concubine Hou was afraid and obediently handed over the vegetable garden.
The second major thing that King Hui of Zhou did was to forcibly occupy the house of the doctor Bian Bo near the palace.
Bian Bo disagreed, and Zhou Huiwang said: Is there a land building permit? Watch out for me to complain to you about the demolition team!
Bian Bo had to hand over the house.
The third major thing that King Hui of Zhou did was to take away the fields of the Grand Master's son, Zhu Kneel, and Zhan Father.
The three refused to give, and Zhou Huiwang said: Is there a field contracting agreement? Beware of my accusations against you for illegally occupying agricultural land!
The three of them had no choice but to hand over their fields.
Another characteristic of King Hui of Zhou is that he cuts the door.
Once, Zhou Huiwang was tight in his hands and said to Chef Shi Suo: Now that the economy is sluggish, major groups have cut salaries and laid off employees. Or is it better to lay off employees?
Shi Suo said: I asked for a pay cut.
Zhou Huiwang said: Everyone can hear it, it was Shi Su who asked me to cut my salary, I have never seen such an employee in my life.
Some people have said that the economy is sluggish, and it is better to cut salaries than to lay off employees, at least to get a part of the salary.
However, if you work under King Huiwang zhou and you still think so, then you are very wrong.
You first listen to the big boss ji to give you an account, your salary is halved, according to the current standards, the previous salary was doubled, after deducting the half of the salary you deserve, you have to return the other salary that was paid to you.
The specific algorithm is like this, the salary paid each month, deducted by half, and then multiplied by the number of months you work, plus interest.
As a result, Shi Suo almost didn't die of depression.
Aren't you the boss? According to what you said, even if you cut my salary, I will still look for your money?
Zhou Huiwang said: There is an opinion, right? I've laid off employees!
Shi Su was afraid, so he had to pay his salary as much as he could. Although he was only a cook, he was also prepared by the imperial court.
Although There were problems with King Hui of Zhou's conduct, sometimes King Hui of Zhou was also quite knowledgeable.
For example, once, the divine stick descended to Xindi. God's stick let out a word, and those who believe in me are saved, and those who do not believe in me go to hell forever.
King Hui of Zhou asked the historian Nei Shi guo: Why did the divine stick go down to mortals?
Nei Shi Guo seized this opportunity and gave Zhou Huiwang a history lesson.
Neishi said: When the dynasty is about to prosper, the gods will go down to examine the virtues of the Son of Heaven. When the dynasty is about to perish, the gods will descend to examine the virtues of the Son of Heaven. Therefore, some countries have received the god stick and prospered. Some countries have received the god stick and perished.
King Hui of Zhou scolded the mother in his heart: Bullshit Brick Family! Nonsense!
Neishi said: Yu, Xia, Shang, and The Thursday Dynasty all had this situation, and if you don't believe it, you can refer to the history textbooks.
Zhou Huiwang said: Textbooks do not need to be referenced, you are the number one academic authority in the field of history, how do you say I should entertain the god stick?
Nei Shi said: Let's do everything according to the procedures, let the god stick eat and touch the meal, and never let people feel that we are engaged in special treatment of the god stick.
King Hui of Zhou asked rhetorically: Touch the rice? What do you mean?
Neishi said: When the god stick comes, what we sacrifice on that day is the sacrifice to the god stick.
The next day, NeiShi Guo brought Shen Stick a rich lunch: a piece of dried green bacon, a bowl of raw corn with chaff, and a few bundles of dried thatch left over from the Chu tribute.
If you don't have enough to eat, tomorrow I will give you a few more bales of thatched roots.
When he met such a cruel person, the god stick was speechless.
When Nei Guoshi returned from worshipping the god stick, he said to King Hui of Zhou: I think that sooner or later the kingdom of Yu will perish.
Zhou Huiwang said: Why?
Nei Shi said: This person, Yu Hou, who is cruel by nature, believes in the words of the God Stick so much, he will not perish, and the God Stick will not agree!
Moreover, it is said that the god stick lived in Xindi for six months, and The Marquis of Yu sent Zhu Ying, ZongQu and Shi Du to serve with good wine and good meat every day, and stuffed a large red envelope every three to five.
After receiving the black money, the God Stick said to Yu Hou: I must give you more territory.
Yu Hou said: I thank you!
Shi Di couldn't look at this anymore.
Shi Duo said to Yu Hou: If the country wants to prosper, it should listen to all its subjects, and only when the country wants to decline and fall will it listen to the gods. God sticks see people talking about people, and seeing ghosts talking about ghosts!
To be fair, in dealing with the problem of the god stick, King Hui of Zhou, who has always been absurd, still has a fairly high emotional intelligence, and beats the god stick out of the prototype with a touch meal.
Next, I would like to ask King Hui of Zhou to talk about your experience.
Zhou Huiwang: It's not that I cut the door and give the god stick to eat and touch the meal, the biggest advantage is that you don't have to spend a dime of hospitality, if you order takeaway, you have to send it up for twenty yuan!
(Excerpt from Episode 208 of Cao Enshuo's new work "Five Thousand Years of Long Talk".) Cao Enshuo Introduction: Founder of the Writers Index List, initiator of the standardized writing movement, post-89 writer and strategist, author of more than 10 million words of various works, proficient in strategy, management and history. ）