Wen | Ling Wheat
Write the warmest words, heal the lonely heart, pay attention to me, and warm you.
Zhou Guoping once said:
"All interactions have an insurmountable final boundary, and all troubles and conflicts stem from the desire to break through this boundary."
Life is like a ruler, there must be a degree; feelings are like faces, do not cross the line. The sense of boundary is an important law in interpersonal communication, strangers should grasp the sense of boundary, acquaintances should grasp the measure.
In the interaction of adults, we must clearly recognize each other's relationship and position, and do not make shallow remarks. No matter how close the friendship relationship is, you must also know how to grasp the sense of proportion, not all things can be talked about, and not all relationships can be shared.
In the relationship between people, the people we should respect must know how to respect, and restrain ourselves in time when we should restrain ourselves. Otherwise, it will not only be unhelpful to enhance feelings, but will also lay hidden dangers for future contradictions. After all, "people's hearts are separated from the belly", and it is always right to leave a heart and eye when you are a person.
There is no sense of boundaries between good friends, do not know how to score inches, it is difficult to last. If we want to have a comfortable and long-lasting relationship, we must pay attention to proportions and know how to maintain a sense of boundaries.
"The heart of harming others must not be there, and the heart of preventing people must not be without." No matter how good the relationship is, don't share these two things with friends.
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" data-track="10" > share their wealth. </h1>
"Brothers, settle accounts". The closer you are, the more you have to calculate money.
In the face of interests, everyone is selfish. Even the best friends, as long as interests are involved, disputes will inevitably occur. Therefore, even if the relationship between two people is good, they must be clearly divided and must not be shared in wealth.
Whether you are rich or poor, don't always mention your financial situation to outsiders. There is less money, and people look down on it. The more money there is, the more money comes to borrow, and we must learn to make a fortune in a muffled voice.
Human feelings are cold and warm, and often cannot withstand the test of a little fame and fortune. Now among good friends, there are not a few people who turn against each other because of money, and if you divide money clearly, you can avoid affecting friendship because of money.
As long as wealth is not properly distributed, it will inevitably cause suspicion on both sides, and the friendship forged over the years is likely to collapse overnight. Therefore, no matter how good the friendship relationship is, don't share such a thing, don't be inappropriate.
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" data-track="16" > share their privacy. </h1>
In the novel "Squid Stewed in Honey Sauce", it is said:
"Leaving a margin for each other is the safe distance between people and people, whether it is friendship, love, or the relationship of ordinary people." 」
We all have our own unique mental journeys, and we all have our own own little secrets. There is really no need to share your privacy and secrets with friends often.
Because you expose your shortcomings and deficiencies, you are giving others weapons to attack you. In order not to cause trouble for yourself, even if the relationship is good, do not easily expose your weaknesses.
The human heart is not as good as we think, and some secrets, once revealed, may eventually become weapons for others to hurt us. Every time people say three points, they can not throw away all their hearts, which is a wake-up call left by the ancients for us.
No matter how good the relationship is, their privacy and weaknesses cannot be easily told to others, and it is easy to cause more trouble when they say it.
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" data-track="23" > Wheat message: Maintaining a sense of boundaries is the measure that interpersonal communication should have. </h1>
The ancients said: "There is no distinction between the serious and the important, and the non-husband is also." ”
In life, an important principle of getting along with people is to maintain a sense of boundaries.
Only in this way, both parties can contact in a more comfortable state, the relationship will be more long-lasting, in order to get along happily. "Everything has a degree, but it is too late." No matter how good the relationship between people, do not share these things, otherwise it is easy to suffer big losses.
In interpersonal psychology, there is a phenomenon called "boundary awareness", which refers to the consciousness of maintaining an appropriate distance from others in the process of interpersonal communication.
People who don't have a sense of boundaries, it's hard to have a good relationship, and it can be tiring to get along with such people. Whether it is family affection, love or friendship in the process of getting along, we must maintain a sense of boundaries, and we must not discard the sense of boundaries that should be there because of a good relationship with each other.
In a healthy relationship, a sense of boundaries can protect us, allowing us to have our own turf and avoid being harmed by others.
Knowing the sense of boundaries, knowing how to weigh the weight of doing things, and knowing how to advance and retreat in dealing with people is a kind of cultivation, but also a kind of wisdom for people to deal with the world.
Author: Ling Mai, a girl who likes words, is very happy to meet you in my words, and is willing to use the warmest brushstrokes to accompany you to live your life into poetry.