A lot of times, people focus only on the big issues in their relationship, forgetting that small issues are also important. What minor problems can lead to a breakup?
When it comes to breakups, most people tend to ask, "What led to a breakup?" And most of the time, everyone will answer a big reason. A bit like a novel, the climax is enough to attract the reader and plunge the protagonist into a downward spiral. However, when the story first starts, things tend to accumulate, don't they? The main problem, the big one, starts out as a collection of small problems, or a single problem that expands like a balloon, until the character has to face it.
The implication is that some small problems, if left untreated for a long time, can turn into a catastrophe. It's not that you have to be suspicious of every little thing in your relationship, it's just that sometimes you feel repetitive. And in these repetitive moments, maybe you should practice restraint and try to control the situation in a different way.
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" data-track="7" > but what are the minor issues to be wary of? </h1>
You may not notice it, but when the following issues accumulate, they are enough to cause two people to break up.
#1 Overly picky. Remember, this is not nagging, which, by the way, is what we're going to talk about next. Being overly critical means that when your partner makes a mistake, you scold them as quickly as a child. If they procrastinate too much on a work project, delay their team for a week, and go home depressed, it's clear that they're being "scolded" at work. If you keep complaining for the next two days, they'll get angry sooner or later.
Sometimes, you have to sit back and remember that they are adults. They should be able to learn from their mistakes instead of making things worse. What you have to do is offer advice, steer them in the right direction, and listen to them vent. Does this mean you should go with the flow? Of course not. It simply means there is a time and place, as well as a method.
#2 Nagging. "Did you wash the dishes?" Why didn't you wash the dishes? Are you on time for work? Maybe if you go to bed early instead of watching TikTok, you won't be so tired all the time. Have you ever wondered about this? All of this, it's not scolding, it's annoying.
In a relationship, it's more about being led through cheerleaders. Literally, and if you're your partner's number one fan and cheer them on when they do good, they'll tend to keep doing it. When things don't go well, you can offer advice so your relationship will be healthy.
#3 Never say "I'm sorry". As trivial as this may sound, it is not. Think of it as the ability to admit that you've done something wrong. If you can't admit your mistakes and only want to admit your strengths, then you lack an actual understanding of yourself and you are too self-righteous. And that's not fair to your partner, especially if you've done something bad to them.
Saying "I'm sorry" is not just a word, but to be able to say, "I'm not perfect." I understand that I made a mistake and instead of making excuses, admit it and recognize that it caused you pain/torture/stress. "
#4 Hardly say a word of love. This means saying "I love you", or simply "You look beautiful/handsome". It's not that your partner needs approval, but hopefully they don't, because that's another issue entirely, it's really just adding another piece of wood to the stove.
In order to maintain the freshness, excitement, love, care, etc. of a relationship, you have to maintain that enthusiasm. Doing little things like acknowledging their attraction, or how you feel about them, will keep that fire burning. Otherwise, if you never do it, they may feel like you don't care about them as much as you used to.
#5 There is no accurate balance between family life and social life. This is especially true for couples who are introverted and extroverted. For example, suppose you are an extrovert and your partner is an introvert. You probably want to get out of the house more than they do. You may start to resent, get bored, or annoy. But one thing to keep in mind: not all introverts and extroverts are the same.
You can easily be an extrovert and as long as you do something meaningful, you can take it easy and fully embrace the idea of staying at home. Or you can be an introvert and as long as you don't need to interact with people you don't know or deal with a large group of people, you won't mind going out.
You're socializing with someone who isn't extroverted or introverted, but you are, then it's important to find a comfortable middle ground. Otherwise, one of you will feel like it's all for the other person.
#6 Help with housework. Sounds like a small problem, but it can accumulate. Note that this reason is not "messy". Sure, sure, dirty mess might annoy your organized partner, but have you ever wondered what would happen if you continued to get dirty all the time but cleaned it up yourself? They will reduce complaints about your dirty lifestyle. They will feel that you are taking responsibility and sharing responsibility. If you leave it all to them, they will definitely feel that you are taking advantage of them and let them become your free babysitter.
#7 Suppress your emotions, thoughts, opinions, anger, etc. Seeing everyone as a time bomb helps. If you load too much stuff, the meter will rise, and if it reaches a certain level, you will explode. Of course, you've had the experience of when your partner makes bad choices and you shut your mouth for fear that they will feel hurt.
There is a way to express your concerns without overly criticizing, nagging, or annoying. If you let things go unchecked and don't deal with small issues in time, you may one day explode in the worst possible way, and eventually you will regret some words and deeds.
#8 Not enough to compromise. If your partner loves playing video games but you find it boring, is it right not to let them play video games? What if you like to invite people over for a small gathering, but your partner doesn't like it and often leaves before everyone arrives? Is it okay to do this?
In short, being in a relationship means being able to compromise. It's not just all about you and your desires and needs. It's about the needs of your relationship. To keep things running smoothly, they can leave you alone for hours while they focus on other things. Or you can find a game that you all love to play. Maybe your partner can attend 2 of the 4 meetups per month.
#9 Ignore your partner. If you text your partner, don't let their text messages be thrown aside for two hours after they reply to you. If your partner texts you, don't sit there and do other things for hours before you reply. Unless you're really busy, stop. If your partner is trying to get your attention and wants your opinion on something, don't ignore them.
Ignoring a person is like saying what they're going to say doesn't really matter to you. If you keep making them feel that way, they're bound to feel like they're no longer very special to you.
#10 Hygiene. Didn't expect this to be on the list? This can definitely lead to a breakup. If you don't take a shower, say, for four days, and expect them to have sex with you, you're dead wrong. If you often walk around with greasy hair and have a smell on your body, will they be happy to show you off in front of their family and friends?
When we break up, we tend to think of bigger questions that are the root of those big ones. It is these tiny problems that accumulate over a period of time that really have a huge impact.
Instead of ignoring these little problems or putting them aside because you don't think they're important enough, try making small changes to fix them and prevent them from getting bigger.
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