Outside the window is the garden, and the grass in winter is bare and looks particularly vast. Surrounded by high walls, there was a redbud in the garden, and the branches of the dead vines seemed to be swaying.
This is Zhang Ailing's description of Man Zhen seeing the scene outside the window in "Half Life", although it is a mottled feeling of writing the scene, it seems that there is still a kind of quiet time. It's just that for Man Zhen at this time, the bauhinia flower only represents the sense of gloom.
This is because she has long held the idea of not living, and even wants to come to this bauhinia flower this year, will there be her ghost? However, she thought of her lover Shi Jun, and thought that she might have the opportunity to see him and continue her relationship.
With these hopes, she chose to be strong in the face of a life "designed" by her sister, and finally spent her life in a tearless marriage.
Zhang Ailing's writing has always been so cold, fierce and ruthless, and the description of a beautiful and talented woman Man Zhen is tear-jerking and sad.
And Man Zhen's tragic fate, in addition to the composition of her sister's "director", also blamed Man Zhen for being too kind and trusting her sister too much.
<h1 class= "pgc-h-arrow-right" > Manzhen's grief is a victim of her sister's greed for wealth</h1>
I have never seen such a woman, who can bite people.
This is Zhu Hongcai's resentment of Man Zhen's resistance in Zhang Ailing's "Half Life", because he was dragged off the bed by Man Zhen and fell down, and the blood on the tip of his nose also flowed down. In the midst of the fierceness, Zhu Hong grabbed Man Zhen's hair and slammed it on the floor a few times until he fainted.
When Man Zhen fainted, he carried her to the bed and took off her clothes one by one, completely ignoring the unconscious Man Zhen's life and death. Being joined together by her sister and brother-in-law, resulting in pregnancy after losing her life, this is the root cause of Man Zhen having to marry her brother-in-law Zhu Hongcai.
This practice is indeed unimaginable, and it can also be said that the initial humiliation suffered by Man Zhen was the idea given to her husband by her sister Man Lu. Only because Zhu Hongcai had already "taken heart" to Man Zhen, and Man Lu, in order to please her husband and make him not covet the flowers and grass outside, he designed to let her husband "make mature rice with raw rice" for his sister, and also swore to her husband: Which day she raised a child, you are assured, you drive her away and she will not refuse, she still sued you for abandonment?
And Zhu Hongcai listened to Man Lu's words, and only then did he turn from worry to joy, for him, whether Man Zhen was willing to be small or unwilling, as long as he could stay by his side.
And Man Lu helped him realize his wish, Zhu Hongcai became more and more attentive to Man Lu, and even felt that he had completely obtained the sisters' flowers, and Mei Zizi's pride showed that he had already planned.
Only at this time, they did not think of Man Zhen's thoughts at all, just thinking about their own selfish desires, for Man Lu she just wanted to use her sister to tie her husband's heart, and Zhu Hongcai was because of her lust for Man Zhen's beauty.
This is not only the beginning of Man Zhen's sadness, but also the sadness that she cannot put in her life, the source is because her sister wants a long-term stable and rich life.
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" > the pain of marriage, bringing Man Zhen is the fault that cannot be turned back</h1>
In the sadness, Man Zhen learned that she was pregnant, after learning the news, she was ashamed and angry, and even she thought of using death to relieve herself, she felt sorry for Shi Jun, sorry for their love, and felt that she was "dirty".
However, in the face of her sister Manlu's confession, under Manlu's "one cry, two troubles and three hangings", her heart gradually softened, so she agreed to marry her brother-in-law.
It can also be understood as a love for her sister Manlu, but at the same time, she is both grateful and hateful.
Grateful is that the sister sacrificed her youth to become a dancer, earning money to support the whole family, and hating is that the sister actually "harmed" herself and lost herself.
Even so, Man Zhen still can't give up his family affection, can't ignore his sister, and still wants to use his own efforts and twists to give his sister a stable second half of her life, and can use her own pain and humiliation to give her sister a quiet second half of life.
In this state of mind, Man Zhen finally agreed to marry Zhu Hongcai, but her heart was already dead, leaving only the dazedness of the flesh.
So in the marriage, Man Zhen does not interact with anyone, just hides himself in the black hole, and even feels that he is unclean. At this time, Zhu Hongcai became bored with her initial rarity, and he was not even willing to take her with him.
Because Man Zhen never dressed up, and her face was always sallow and sallow, completely devoid of the beauty and radiance she had before, and she always did not speak, as if the whole world had nothing to do with her.
For example, when the couple quarreled, Man Zhen never turned over the old accounts, and did not have so many expressions. No matter how provocative Zhu Hongcai was, she always had an expression of not caring about herself.
This is Man Zhen's married life, more tasteless than boiled water, the wounds of the years have made her unable to look back, whether it is lost love, or the fading youth, it is a touch of sadness and pain.
Experiencing the betrayal of the closest person, experiencing the departure of love and eyes, only the unbearable look back of the past and the scars of tears flowing first, this is the painful half of Man Zhen in marriage.
<h1 class= "pgc-h-arrow-right" > time that cannot go back, and it is a regret everywhere in life</h1>
The story is lamentable, but Man Zhen's tragedy is also caused by her soft heart, if she can not pity her sister Man Lu so much, then life may become different.
It's just that there are years to look back, if you complain, you can only complain about Manlu's "fierceness", for your own future, and sacrifice your sister's happiness for your own rich life.
In the face of Man Lu's ruthlessness and means, Man Zhen clearly knows her sister's personality, but she still can't bear it for the sake of family affection, and finally she can't bear it, so she chooses to be patient, and with her own pain and resentment, she has achieved her sister's quiet years.
Is such a person kind? Not really.
Although Man Lu's act of using his own sister as a bargaining chip to exchange for life is "evil", Man Zhen still has many choices. For example, she can choose to flee, can choose not to give in, or even go far away.
Because of his reluctance and intolerance of family affection, Man Zhen repeatedly let himself be silent in grievances, lost in silence, and even gave up on himself, until finally no one had a good ending and a good life. It can also be said that this is the tragedy of all people, the misfortune of all people.
It also reminds me of a saying: not all goodness can wait for flowers. Some kindness can only become "cocooning oneself" and missing countless times of life. From another point of view, even if life is plunged into endless darkness, there is always a way to break free.
The first thing to do is to face the hardships and difficulties of life, as well as misfortunes and setbacks, and then find ways to improve life, even if it is bitter, even if it is difficult, as long as you do not give up, there will always be a way to solve it.
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" > written at the end</h1>
Shi Jun said: How are you now, is there enough money?
This is the scene of Man Zhen seeing Shi Jun again many years later, facing his former lover, facing the feelings of love to the fierce, but he can only look at it from a distance. And Man Zhen is like telling someone else's story, calmly telling how he borrowed money to fight with Zhu Hongcai, and only then divorced to get custody of his son.
Until Shi Jun said, I once looked for you, but your sister Man Lu said that you married someone and gave me back the ring. Only then was Man Zhen surprised that her sister had treated her like this.
The misunderstanding of half a life, the reincarnation of half a life, let the two really understand each other's intentions, but one sentence: can not go back. Full of too much heartache, this is the most helpless dilemma in the world.
How many differences there are in the world are already forever, how many differences are sudden, and they may still be together today, and tomorrow they will fly apart.
As Zhang Ailing wrote at the end: The night outside the window is dark, the curtains are like a woman's skirt blowing in the wind, as if it is walking at any time, and the door is not entered, if both of them have lost something, there is a sense of waste in this life.
This is exactly what it is: life is just a gorgeous miss, like a gorgeous robe crawling with lice. Just as in man Zhen's vicissitudes and hurt marriage, it is a wound that wants to cry without tears, but there are thousands of tastes, only the parties concerned understand.
From this, I think of Zhang Ailing's life, not just like Man Zhen constantly missed, from gorgeous opening to eclipsed curtain, since this is a momentary choice of difference, but also the whirlpool in the fate of the wrong love life.
Today's topic: Man Zhen was framed by his sister and unhappy for life, what is Man Lu's motivation for doing so? Welcome to leave a message