01
Some philosophers believe that speaking is not only an instinct, nor is it just a skill, but also an art.
Everyone can talk, but not everyone can speak well of their own. There are too many people who are unlucky because of their words, and who ruin their lives because of their words.
In the workplace, you talk randomly, do not care about the face of the boss, and even trespass some bottom lines, I believe that you can only stay where you are, and you can't go up.
In the interpersonal field, you say the wrong thing, do not grasp the degree of speech, believe that you will be excluded by the people in the circle, and finally become a lonely person in the corner.
In the human society, you do not know how to deal with others, and you will not win the favor of others in words, then you will be easily suppressed by people and it is difficult to develop.
Why does talking become a major event in the survival of human beings?
The original speech behavior is for communication. To communicate this matter, it is about the heat, not the so-called what you want to say, just say. In doing so, it is easy to harm yourself.
In fact, those who are relatively high-level will not put these words on their lips. Only those at a lower level will put these words on their lips.
02
People at a high level don't say "hurtful" things.
There is a saying that "a good word is warm in three winters, and a bad word hurts people in June."
If you say a good word, others will feel like a spring breeze, even if they are in the middle of winter, they do not feel cold. And if you say a bad word, then your words will be direct and chilling.
When Xiao Chen first came to work in the unit, he would tell others the "truth". Either accuse the boss of doing something wrong in person, or say to the face that the colleague is not doing it. In the end, Xiao Chen was transferred to a remote department.
And Xiao Chen himself did not understand, the teachers of the school told them that they should tell the truth as a person, there is no need to hide it. And I also choose to tell the truth, why do I make others unhappy?
After several years of tempering, Xiao Chen finally understood that people who can really be human will not say things that are difficult for others to accept. Especially those truths like needles, you must not say them to outsiders.
Especially your boss, if you often say something real and hurtful to him, you are likely to offend people and end up with more than you lose. To be human, there is no need to be so honest.
03
People at a high level don't say "going against the grain."
There is such a case.
Little A followed the boss to meet the customer, the boss said, he recorded what, anyway, very well-behaved. However, when saying goodbye to the customer, Little A made a mistake.
The boss told Xiao A to let him deliver the customer, and Xiao A also talked with the customer and walked to the parking lot. During the conversation, Xiao A inadvertently said something contrary to the opinion of his superiors, so he was beaten up by the customer.
A few days later, the boss learned about this and gave Xiao A a look. As a secretary, Little A did not know what he had done, and he was particularly confused. As a result, he missed the opportunity for promotion.
If you don't want to offend others, then we try to talk as little as possible and don't say our own opinions, then you won't offend others.
However, if you want to rise better, it is better for you to be cautious, and what your boss says, then you say. You know, too much head iron, too much exposure of edges and corners, the result will be very miserable.
04
People at a high level don't say "negative and extreme" things.
If you had to choose someone to be your friend, would you choose someone who spoke positively or someone who spoke negatively?
A person who is full of positive energy words, although it is a little unreal, he will definitely gain the likes of others. And people who are full of negative energy words, even if he is right, will be rejected.
In this regard, some people will say, is this not a contradiction?
In fact, there is no absolute right or wrong in this world, but only different people have different standards. Just imagine, even someone as wise as Tang Taizong wanted to kill Wei Zheng, so why should anyone else?
Your boss, if you like to listen to good words, then you say good things, anyway, what others need, we will say. There's no need to dwell on some words.
Your friend, if you don't like to hear negative words, then you don't talk about negativity, or say something positive. At the very least, most people like to be exposed to the light.
Therefore, if you know how to be a person, you can avoid saying the wrong thing.
05
People with high levels will not "pierce" the masks of others.
It has been said that this is a society where everyone wears a mask.
You wear a red mask, he wears a black mask, she wears a white mask... Anyway, there are as many masks as there are in this world. In this regard, we just need to respect others, and there is no need to dwell too much.
However, people, in the end, will be entangled. Young people, in particular, see others in disguise, hope to pierce others and embarrass others. This is a particularly stupid act.
There is a saying that "see through without saying broken." ”
What you can see through, others can see through, but why don't others say it? Because others know that it is better not to say more wrong than not to say. In doing so, at least you can maintain a good relationship with the other party, and at the same time protect yourself.
People, there is no need to be heroic in the matter of "speaking", and there is no need to always ignore people. A lot of things, almost enough, why bother?
Wen/Shushan has deer