Ancients Cloud: Life is not satisfactory, often eight or nine, can be the same as people.
To get out of the downturn, you need to calm down and do things, and calm down. When you are irritable and unable to control your emotions, it is better to read "Zhuangzi", absorb the wisdom of the sages and sages, polish yourself in setbacks after setback, and eventually achieve a gorgeous transformation.
01
In the face of children, do not "raise birds with yourself, but" raise birds with birds. ”
"Zhuangzi" tells the story of a Lu migratory bird:
A seabird stopped on the outskirts of the capital of the Lu kingdom, and the king of the State of Lu was very happy, welcomed the seabird into the Taimiao Temple, set up a feast, and ordered someone to play the music of "Nine Shao", and prepared three animals for it to enjoy, but the seabird only felt dazzling and sad, did not dare to eat and drink, and died after three days.
Lu Hou can be described as "taking out the best things" to seabirds, without the slightest stinginess. But what he gave was not based on the way of survival of seabirds, which was not suitable at all, and the result was counterproductive.
Therefore, the author sighed: "This is to raise birds by oneself, not to raise birds with birds." ”
For many middle-aged people, they also unconsciously fall into such a strange circle.
In the face of adolescent children, they always try to use their own experience to guide their growth, and always look forward to children to achieve their dreams. Especially in academics, it is better to be "blue out of blue and better than blue".
Therefore, if you try to arrange big and small things for them to study and live, the end is either that adults are rejected and feel very uncomfortable, or that children accept it but blindly perfunctory.
As a result, they looked at each other, quarrels and confrontations appeared. In the end, both sides were exhausted, neither of them could do what they wanted, and the people who were originally closest to them were pushed farther and farther away.
Therefore, when you are facing the child's "self-awareness" is getting stronger, you may wish to let go of your own arrogance and prejudice, abandon your inherent ideas and opinions, patiently listen to what the child says, try to use the way he likes, and let him grow.
Perhaps, when you learn to let go and learn to lead behind the far back, the child is more attached to you, and the parent-child relationship is no longer tense.
02
In the face of emotions: it is better to be in love with each other than to forget each other.
What do you most want about love?
In "Zhuangzi", the story of "two fish" is told:
The spring dried up, and two fish were trapped on land, spitting out spit on each other to keep alive. Therefore, the author sighed that "instead of doing so, it is better to let them forget each other in the rivers, lakes and seas."
This is the popular "mutual foam, it is better to forget each other in the rivers and lakes." ”
People often say that "suffering sees the truth", and the more people who really love each other, the more difficulties and dangers come, the more they want to use their own one to switch each other's safety. This is certainly touching, but it also means that neither person may be able to continue to live well.
We are inseparable from each other, we are in the same boat with each other, we are in the same boat with each other.
But if this dilemma is big enough to destroy two people, does such a persistence still make sense?
Therefore, Zhuangzi told people: "It is better to be in love with each other than to forget each other in the rivers and lakes." "Sometimes, people who are in love choose to let go and be okay with each other, not because they don't love, but because they transcend love."
Let go of yourself, complete each other, worry about the rest of your life in the future, and have a soft thought in your heart,
The most romantic thing in this life is that the person you love is also deeply in love with you. Therefore, the love that is mixed with each other and the love that is forgotten in the rivers and lakes are all a kind of luck.
03
Facing the workplace: I am born to be useful.
Born as a human being, you always have to know something, always have to do something, in order to stand in the world.
Therefore, everyone must find their own "skill" in order to get a chance to survive in this world full of cruel competitive relations.
Many people, in order to make a living, constantly improve their academic qualifications and take various licenses, just to make themselves look "very useful". In the workplace, for a post, I am willing to suffer all the grievances, suffer hardships, and spend day after day with a posture of bearing the burden of humiliation.
But when this effort is not rewarded, or even depressed due to hiding one's dissatisfaction with all kinds of "unfairness" for a long time, the feeling of "unhappiness" will swallow up all one's confidence, so that it is self-deprecating and self-loathing.
Then, such a day is not a kind of shackles.
In this regard, Zhuangzi told people the story of "loose wood": there is a big tree, people call it Ailanthus, its main trunk wood tumor is too much out of line ink, the branches are bent and unruly, it grows on the side of the road, and the carpenters are dismissive.
Such a tree is so "big", but what is the "use"? Zhuangzi told the people that if this tree is transplanted to a deserted countryside, people can circle around it without doing anything, or stay under the tree to sleep, can't you make this tree "useful"?
It can be seen that in the eyes of others, "useless" people are not useless, but they are not placed in the right place, and once they find a suitable platform, they can play a unique "big use".
Therefore, when you are repeatedly "excluded", "suppressed" and used as a "tool person" in the workplace, you may wish to give yourself a chance to re-choose, do what you love to do, do what you are good at, and you will see a new world.
04
Conclusion:
People often say that if you don't experience wind and rain, how to see a rainbow.
When a person is most difficult and difficult, it is actually also a period of tempering his mind and improving himself the fastest.
As a saying on the Internet says: Survive the days when no one cares, there are poems and distant places.
When you are not satisfied, go and read Zhuangzi, whose tolerance, open-mindedness and various "fantastic ideas" can always give you a sense of "sudden enlightenment".
This world is not as complicated as you think, so difficult to get along with, when you broaden your horizons and improve your cognition, the things that were originally bound are really not worth mentioning.
Author: Like the wind is light as a cloud.
Your happiness, my blessings.
Images are from the web.