"Ning Er, Dad couldn't have imagined that from August 3, 2008, he would never see you again."
In 2009, writer Zhou Daxin wrote the first sentence of his novel "Requiem" on his computer. It was late spring, and the flowers in the street were blooming. He closed the curtains, unscrewed the lamp, and the noise outside the window was cut off from him. Under the orange light, there was only the crackling sound of fingers tapping on the keyboard.
When writing Requiem, he used to wear a black jacket and make a cup of black tea. In the heat, the past is back.
Zhou Daxin
On August 3, 2008, Zhou Daxin lost his long-ill only son, Ning'er. Two months later, his novel "Lakes and Mountains" won the 7th Mao Dun Literature Award. Aura, praise, glory... There is no resistance to the pain of losing a child.
For the next three years, Pain was his close friend.
He wrote very slowly, sometimes writing only a few hundred words a day. "It was so uncomfortable that sometimes I had to interrupt and take a walk."
When walking, he always passes by a bush of moons. The pink-white flowers swayed slightly, and the fragrance of the flowers was not mellow, but it brought him a brief comfort. For a few seconds, it seemed, he briefly withdrew from the pain of losing his independence. The next second, however, the pain re-engulfed, and the pain lasted for an indefinite period of time, with no end in sight.
He had nowhere to hide.
Only the pen, pick up his most beloved pen, write down, write down sorrow, write down reluctance, write regret and pain, think and remember. Suffering merges into a river, and the name of the river is "Requiem".
Three years later, Requiem was published.
Zhou Daxin's "Requiem"
"Dad, calm down and accept the facts. I have left the world, I will never be able to return to you and my mother, and the facts cannot be changed. ”
In the fantasy, the eternally sleeping son is talking to him. In the fantasy, the son hears all his thoughts, repentance, and despair.
"The work of weeping blood," the waist seal of "Requiem" said. In the eyes of the world, he is a famous writer; in "Requiem", he is just an ordinary father. Like many fathers, they will be strong and vulnerable.
"My life has been a lot of pain." He told Red Star News, "Some are reluctant to mention it again." ”
During the interview, Zhou Daxin choked up several times. The Red Star News reporter told him, "If any of my questions make you unhappy, you won't answer them." ”
"It's all right," he said repeatedly, comforting the reporter when he finished, "you can write what you just said." You don't have to show it to me when you're done. His voice was always trying to remain calm, sometimes with a smile, as if all the pain had not happened, as if the summer of 2008 was never upon.
On March 25, 2022, the film of the same name based on "Requiem" will be released. Zhou Daxin said, "After watching it for the first time, I can't watch it anymore." ”
Talk about writing:
Writing Requiem is self-redemption
Red Star News: You have been writing for many years and have won numerous awards, which work is your most memorable?
Zhou Daxin: The most memorable thing is "Requiem". Because this book is my own work. Of course, it is also written for parents around the world who have lost their children.
Red Star News: What does this work mean to you?
Zhou Daxin: It is a kind of self-redemption, and I hope to comfort parents who have lost their children all over the world. The world is because of disease, car accidents, wars... There are many parents who have lost their children, and these people actually need comfort. May this work give them hope and allow them to face life again. The book was translated into English, Spanish, Arabic... Many readers feel that this book brings them comfort. At a symposium, a German friend said, "This is an oriental divine comedy." ”
Red Star News: How long was Requiem written? Did the writing process go well?
Zhou Daxin: Three years. The second year the child left, in 2009, he began to write. Very painful. Because every memory is very tearing. Writing is very slow, sometimes I can only (write) a few hundred words a day, I write slowly. Because writing this book makes you feel very uncomfortable, you sometimes have to interrupt, take a walk, take a break, and read a book. I can't remember now (whose book I read at the time), but there are a little more philosophical books anyway. If "Requiem" is divided into two parts, the most painful thing is to write the first part, when recalling. The latter part is entirely dependent on imagination, because the fictional world is of a comforting nature, and the heart is better.
Red Star News: After writing it, will you feel a little better?
Zhou Daxin: It will be a little better. I wouldn't mention it. When I mention it, everything comes back to my mind and can't be forgotten, so I try to avoid it, but in life, it is inevitable that it will be touched again.
Red Star News: When it is uncomfortable, how to relieve the heart?
Zhou Daxin: I never say. Only through writing, thankfully I have this avenue.
Red Star News: Can it be understood that, in a sense, writing is your refuge?
Zhou Daxin: Yes, it is the refuge you said. At the same time, it also gave me a way to talk and let myself get emotional balance, and if I didn't write, I might be more uncomfortable.
Red Star News: How do you define where writing is in your life?
Zhou Daxin: Very important. When you are young, you can actually take other paths, if you are not engaged in writing, you can become a staff officer, a leader, and take a career path. I never regretted it. Looking back now, I was fortunate to have taken this path, otherwise the pain would have been very difficult for me to bear.
Red Star News: Writing is so important to you, but last year you announced that you were writing a novel, would you feel sorry?
Zhou Daxin: Mainly my body can't hold on. I usually write a long story, both for two or three years. It's certainly okay to do one thing consistently for two or three years, but it makes me feel very tired. In the past, I wrote 1 million words of long stories, I wrote for 10 years, and I didn't feel tired, and now I feel tired when I write three or four hours a day. I am worried that as I get older, my artistic feelings, sensitivity, etc. will be affected, and I will write bad works and bring bad feelings to readers. A lot of friends felt like I should keep writing, but I was really scared.
Red Star News: Last year, you confessed, "I am 69 years old this year, what should I do and what I should not do, I should be soberly aware that I must learn to retreat, and I can't go forward desperately." "In your opinion, what situation should you retreat?"
Zhou Daxin: It is that you should not make a big creative plan, make a long-term creative arrangement, and stop putting extra heavy burdens on yourself. Learn to do what you can and write works that can be completed.
Talk about the twist:
The understanding of people is deeper and more tolerant
Red Star News: "Requiem" was written for three years, has these three years brought you a big change?
Zhou Daxin: It is also a growth. Although I have reached old age, in fact, many questions have not been thought of before, this is a concentrated thinking.
Red Star News: What are the questions that are focused on?
Zhou Daxin: About the meaning of life. In the past, it was all hurried to live, panicked to cope. But what exactly does it mean? Why is there so much pain in life? Why are people born? What is the point of suffering in such a short period of time? These questions are metaphysical questions that I don't usually think about, but in the process of writing, I have to think about them. Usually we say, know, think, but because (life) does not give you personal stimulation, it is difficult for you to reach a certain depth. I took this opportunity to think about these questions.
Red Star News: Did you find the answers to these questions during the writing process?
Zhou Daxin: The second half of the book has it. The second half is not a description of figurative life, but a complete reflection, written entirely by imagination. Some things, in fact, have not been fully understood. Sometimes the writer is a thinker, and there are many questions that he can ask. But not all the answers. But I still gave some answers to some questions, which of course are not always accurate.
Red Star News: The process of finding the answer is not easy, right?
Zhou Daxin: Yes, after finding it, there is also a feeling of relief. Life is actually a process of enduring difficulties, and to calculate, happy times are very few, so they are very short, and most of them are troubles and pains. In fact, everyone has experienced pain, but everyone's pain is not the same. Some people go through this kind of pain, some people go through that kind of pain, and then after some realization, they leave this world. If there is a way to leave your own feelings behind, it is a help to future generations, and it is enough not to stay. In the world, which person do you say lives easily? In fact, it is not easy to think about. Whether it is politics, business, farming, creation... Like you guys doing news interviews, which guy is easy, right?
Red Star News: Was Requiem a turning point in your writing?
Zhou Daxin: It should be a turning point. Writing about people or the world in the past, I feel like I understand them. In fact, since then, I feel that many characters have not reached my later understanding. After writing "Requiem", my understanding of people, the past, life, human nature, the relationship between people and the natural world... More profoundly, I am more tolerant of others. In the past, when I looked at people, I looked at them with "normal" and worldly eyes to make very simple judgments. After this, when you look at others, you will feel that his life is not easy and difficult, and there is a compassionate heart. When I was young, I just liked Tolstoy, and later, I felt that Tolstoy's idea of "making the world full of love" was indeed right. It is true that people should not be blindly tossed around, but should understand each other, tolerate each other, and spend their short lives peacefully.
Talk about introspection:
If life comes back, the child's wishes will be respected
Red Star News: In "Requiem", you reflect on the way you and your wife educated Ning Er many times.
Zhou Daxin: (If life can be repeated, I think the biggest change is to respect his wishes, and he can be advised on some choices, but not forced. I used to force him and arrange it for him. If you really have this opportunity, you will definitely not go the old way again, and you must respect the wishes of your children.
When we come to the world, everyone has their own rights. Although the parent gives the child life, he cannot decide the course of his life, and he has to face his life problems by himself.
Red Star News: You said that you wanted to be a writer who brought a little warmth to the world and to readers, did you feel like you had done it?
Zhou Daxin: My later works all tried to work hard in this regard. My subjective wish is to bring warmth to everyone and make them feel that the world is very warm. Including my later works, especially "Dark Is Slow", about the social life of the elderly, I should be able to appreciate this.
Zhou Daxin, "It's Dark Slowly"
Red Star News: You've spoken of the fear of the passage of time. You say that there are scholars who believe that everything in time always exists, which gives you comfort. Now, is there still a fear of the passage of time?
Zhou Daxin: Of course there are. Because I'm actually at the end of my life, right? I'm 70 this year. In fact, the Creator has given me very little time. There are very few things I can do, and I can only seize the time to do what I want to do.
Red Star News: What do you most want to do?
Zhou Daxin: I want to build a library in my hometown, called Zhou Daxin Library, and recently completed it. It opened on March 4th this year in my hometown of Dengzhou, Henan Province. I donated more than 10,000 of my own collection of books, and I bought more than 10,000 books, donating more than 25,000 books. It also donated more than 500,000 yuan for the purchase of new books year by year. He also donated 69 paintings of precious calligraphy. Only reading can send us to a higher civilization.
Talking about movies:
After reading it once, you can't look at it again
Red Star News: Will you go to see the movie "Requiem" (directed by Hyuga Teraro and starring Weizi, Chen Jin, Qiang Yu, etc.) after the release?
Zhou Daxin: I've seen it. A friend who was a professor in Japan told the Japanese director about the book, and it was later made into a movie. In the process of making the film, I kept seeing the clips, because I had to give opinions, so when I watched it, it would be very uncomfortable, and after watching it for the first time, I couldn't watch it again.
Red Star News: After you read it, what suggestions did you make?
Zhou Daxin: I think the re-creation of the director and screenwriter on the basis of the original work is relatively successful, and I am still relatively satisfied. Cinema is another art, it is not the same thing as literature, it needs adaptation, it needs a story.
Wei Zi in the movie "Requiem" (pictured according to the stills)
Qiang Yu (right) in the movie "Requiem" (pictured according to the stills)
Red Star News: What do you think of the performances of Wei Zi (as father) and Qiang Yu (as children)?
Zhou Daxin: Qiang Yu acted ok and not bad. Wei Zi acted very well and in place, and his grasp of the character's heart was very accurate. In fact, it is difficult for me to have a professional evaluation of the performance of the film. Film is an art, it is another kind of artistic performance nature, it is artistic creation. He's not me anymore.
Red Star News: In your opinion, Weizi is not performing you?
Zhou Daxin: Right. He is the father of a child who has lost his child in the performance.
Red Star News: Do you want this film to bring comfort to parents who have had similar experiences to you?
Zhou Daxin: Yes.
Red Star News reporter Peng Li provided a picture of the interviewee
Edited by Li Jie
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