As three-quarters of the "mischievous" moms, I rarely hesitate to face the baby's requirements or problems.
If it doesn't work, if it doesn't work, it doesn't work.
Only once, a few years ago, the 5-year-old baby suddenly asked, Mom, can I have a kitten? Please!
I looked into Eva's eyes and suddenly felt like a piece of cotton stuffed in my throat, trying to say something, but I couldn't say it...
Just during the New Year, Big J took the baby to visit the New Year, and Little D was also fascinated by the kittens of his relatives, should he have a cat in the end? Big J asked everyone for help in the public account, and the rolling message gave me the courage to mention this matter again...
Can you let the baby have a kitten? These stories are the reasons why I can't answer this question.
The kitten who didn't dare to go near the door
The first few years of college were the darkest times of my life.
The family was forced to wander around the country, from one temporary worker to the next temporary rental house, and when I was finally able to return to my hometown, I was the only one left in the family.
The house was empty, getting dirtier day after day.
On a thunderstorm night in that summer, a friend rescued a small black cat from the heavy rain on the side of the road, looking like it had just been weaned for a short time, trembling, seeing that people were not afraid at all, and almost directly rushed to the feet of people for help.
My friend's family did not have the conditions to keep a cat, and asked me if I could adopt it.
I remember a fierce heat rush through my heart: I have a company with kittens!
Friends helped the kittens with cat food, litter, canned cats, cat beds, and cat toys, but I soon discovered that that wasn't what the kittens needed.
The kitten did not dare to sleep on its own, it had to sleep huddled with me, and it could not be placed at its feet, in the bed, it had to be coiled around my neck, its face was pressed against my face, and it felt my breath hit its face before it dared to sleep.
When I go out to work during the day, it will chase me all the way to the door, but as soon as it is close to the gate, it will bounce back like an electric shock, and it will not go near the door.
I tried to pick her up and walk out the door, and she would convulse with fright and make a hissing roar.
It must have slipped out of the house on that thunderstorm night, completely frightened by the outside world, never dared to go near the door again, and was no longer willing to leave its master.
I was filled with guilt every day during that time.
It's like every time you go out, you abandon it once, and every day you have to watch the kitten chase after me, desperately, but don't dare to shout at me, chase to the position near the door, and turn around in fear, watching me really step out of the door, its big eyes are immediately filled with tears.
After holding on for less than half a month, I collapsed myself, and I thought that I was alone, able to accompany and comfort each other with the lonely kittens, but found that I, who had a wound in my heart, had no strength to heal the wound of another life.
Friends found another pair of owners for the kitten, the couple had 2 Labrador dogs and 3 cats, when they came to pick up the kittens, two big dogs came to the door in person, I thought the kittens would be scared, but the two gentle dogs quickly licked it like it was back in the arms of the mother...
For many years afterwards, I didn't dare to remind myself of the kitten, and I believed that it had found a happy home.
When the wound in my heart is still bleeding, I am incapable of loving others well, and this is the kitten who does not dare to go near the door, teaching me love.
Neighbors, too, are part of the story
No matter how big the impact of life on us, there will always be a time to get back on track.
During the last relatively stable and peaceful time of her life that my mother and I spent together, my family welcomed a special pet, the piglet.
Yes, in those years, it was very popular to keep black and white small fragrant pigs as pets.
▲ Photos from QQ space archaeology (full of age sense slag picture quality there are wood)
I myself belong to the pig, so in a treasure to see the pet shop advertisement, I really can't help but look over for a long time, my mother also followed me to watch for a long time, suddenly one day, she said behind my back, want to raise it, as long as it is determined that it is a small fragrant pig, will not feed and feed suddenly grow into a big wild boar on the line.
I was surprised by this.
When I was a child, my aunt's family had a lot of cats, and under my pleading, my mother also took them back to raise them, but always within a few months, as soon as the cats made trouble, my mother impatiently sent the cat back to my aunt's house.
I said, if you don't want to raise it for a while, there is no place to send it back.
Then let's keep it ourselves, she replied calmly.
So, I had one more pig in my house.
When I first got home from the airport, the piglet was about the same length as my TV remote control, which was really mini cute, and its little pig had hard nails on its trotters, and it slipped from time to time on the waxed wooden floor of my house.
In the winter, standing under the window to bask in the sun, sunbathing comfortably and dozing off, will suddenly slip under the feet and almost slip down, which is not funny.
The seller swore that the piglet actually loves to be clean, and the advertising words that are smarter than dogs really have a little meaning.
After the piglet entered my house and determined where his nest was, he kept firmly running to the farthest distance from its nest, my mother's bedroom to pull and pee...
Later, after my mother's repeated training, I learned to go to the bathroom to facilitate.
I also often take the pig out for a walk, buy him puppy clothes and shoes to keep warm when it is cold, of course, everywhere I go is the focus.
▲ Take the piggy out for a walk, it likes to smell in one place for a long time
The seller said that to control the size of the piglet, he must not let it eat casually, feed it regularly every day, give some rice + vegetables, and occasionally add some fruit.
But want to control the appetite of pigs, it is not easy, as long as there is no one in the family, the piglets will start to rummage around the boxes and cabinets to find food, what garbage cans, drawers, low cabinets are turned over, what tea, books, notebooks I used to go to school, can chew it dare to eat into the stomach.
The biggest suspense of raising a small fragrant pig is whether this pig will grow a big wild boar.
My family has been raising it for almost 1 year, and it is still a little smaller than the average small dog, but it does weigh a lot more.
But this little pig still hasn't been able to stay in my house all the time because of the sound of the pig.
"It's worse to scream than to kill a pig!"
This sentence, the original is not false at all, although the piglet is very small, but the call is full of breath, it is really unhappy to shout, such as when the box is turned over and the cabinet can not find any food, he can alarm the neighbors of the whole unit.
When he was a child, he did not like to call much, after a few months, probably sexual maturity, the temper of the piglet became more and more grumpy, a call did not stop, after the birth control operation, the grumpy temper was slowly getting better, but the problem of this love to call was getting worse and worse.
Finally one day, the aunt upstairs came to say that her wife's coronary heart disease was committed, the operation was completed, the doctor said that it was necessary to rest, and the pig's cry was too noisy.
My family lives in the self-built community of my mother's unit, and almost all the people in the courtyard are old colleagues who have known each other for twenty or thirty years, old neighbors, and the situation in each other's homes is probably known, and what the aunt says is the truth.
My mother and I have thought of a lot of ways, but the piglet can wear the puppy's clothes and shoes, but it can't bring the puppy's muzzle, and the neck ring prepared for the pet dog, which will be a slight electric shock when it is called, will stimulate the piglet to bark more like a pig to kill...
After a round of tossing and turning, the aunt upstairs came every day to ask about the situation, and finally, the piglet was finally sent away.
Sent to a small resort-style farm on the outskirts of the city, with many small animals and a lot of ecological vegetables for everyone to take their children to play on the weekend.
Half a year after Piglet left, I was admitted back to my alma mater in Beijing for graduate school, and within a semester of graduate school, my mother diagnosed uterine cancer and died on New Year's Day, when I was not yet 30 years old.
I don't think about Piggy very often now, because whenever I think about it, I think that I spent that time with my mother, the last peace and warmth of her life.
My "pet" was eaten
When the baby wanted to have a cat a few years ago, we discussed it in the work group;
Big J said that she remembered that when she was a child, she had a special favorite duck, and then she was killed and cooked soup...
How many "horrors" of eating your pet have happened in the childhood of the 80s and 90s? Why is this happening?
On that day, it occurred to me that this would not be the case:
In the eyes of parents, these are originally "meats" raised to cook soup;
But in the eyes of children, this is playing with me every day, my dear friend;
We didn't tell each other what I thought, what you thought, and probably never felt that this still needs to be discussed...
Everyone's ideas can be different, including how to look at pets, and within the scope of daily life, this does not need to be measured by "right and wrong";
But if we seriously communicate this before we have a puppy kitten or duckling, then we and our pets will be able to love more and have less regrets.
It's the love I learned from the regrets of losing my pet when I'm almost 40 years old.
answer......
When the child asked me if I could have a kitten, I didn't know how to answer.
In my nearly 40 years of life, there are actually more than 3 stories about pets, as well as silkworm babies that my teacher asked to raise when I was a child; chicken cubs and ducklets that I bought when I passed under the overpass; hamsters brought to the classroom by classmates; lorises, turtles and spiders raised by my cousins.
In all these stories, every little life has left its mark on my life, allowing me to experience or learn what love is related to life and that humans cannot teach me.
Of course, I hope that my children will also have the opportunity to experience a richer and wider world than the reinforced concrete jungle of the "two-legged beast".
But the stories I've experienced, the endings are all, and we haven't been able to accompany these little animals to the end.
I almost never feel indebted to another person, because I firmly believe that the first person responsible for each person's life is themselves, and that in the joys and sorrows of mankind, human beings have the freedom of choice and the ability to work hard.
But the little animals, there is no choice.
Am I really ready to welcome another life into my life, as responsible for my own children, to the end?
If I tell these stories to my children, will they understand my struggles, or will they want to have a pet more?
What about you?
What kind of stories do you have about the little animals that you will definitely tell your children?
Big J nagged
Years later, I shared with you the entanglement of little D wanting to keep a pet, and someone in the message asked me, Big J, you may wish to think about why you don't want to keep it.
Within a few days, I received this article from the second meat bag mother, and after reading it, I wanted to cry a little, and I felt that I felt the tangled feelings in my heart.
I'm going to tell little D these stories tonight, and I especially want to hear your stories.