Needless to say, the importance of a first date is well known. Psychology also has a primacy effect: the first impression formed by both parties to the interaction has an important impact on the future relationship.
Although these first impressions are not always correct, they are the most vivid and solid, and determine the course of future interactions between the two sides.
If you can make a good impression on the first date, then he is willing to get close to you, and they can get to know each other quickly, and it will affect the other person's interpretation of your future series of behaviors and performances.
For a negative example, the red lady teacher had a member before, she went on a first date with the boy she liked, and after the appointment, she was inexplicably issued a good guy card by the boy. The teacher asked the girl to carefully recall the details of the date, and then found three mistakes:
● 1, wearing too much force: low-cut dress plus hate sky high, girls think of the first date, must be treated solemnly, their own evening dress to find out, bracelet necklace earrings are fully armed, is simply a walking flash;
● 2, speaking incoherently: due to too much nervous excitement, the first date girl speaks a bit incoherently, does not show her playful cuteness in the chat;
● 3, did not pay attention to table manners: girls have been more picky about eating, in this date, there is no special attention, in the time of eating vegetables have been picking and choosing;
In fact, these will leave a deep negative impression on the boy, and it is no wonder that the boy gives him a good man card.
So what should we do on the first date to give ourselves extra points?
1
Choose the outfit that suits you
Many girls think that dating must be dressed up, heavy makeup, hate sky high, or very formal clothes to show their importance of dating, but this idea itself is wrong.
First of all, dating itself is a relaxing project, and boys also want to get comfort and pleasure in the process.
If he sits opposite a girl who is tense and dressed, he will also have a certain sense of pressure, which is not conducive to his impression of you.
We can choose clothing depending on the occasion of the date.
For example, for a normal dinner date, you can choose a light-colored dress or suit, with shiny earrings, both gentle and feminine. If the restaurant is dimly lit and the earrings sway between laughs, it is more temperamental and radiant.
If you are going to outdoor sports, choose casual and comfortable sportswear, you can choose loose sweatpants and tight T-shirts to outline your own curves, high ponytail youth vitality, if you are afraid of the sun, you can wear a baseball cap, so that the casual and comfortable feeling will make boys relax, can't help but want to be close to you.
Different dating locations to choose the right clothing, can not the other party to ask you to go hiking, you step on high heels to go, the other party asks you to go to the bar, you wear a sweatshirt to go, it is as embarrassing as the text is not right.
In addition, we must also avoid using too much force, show our strengths and avoid weaknesses, and create a comfortable atmosphere that is the most important.
02
Pay attention to your own "words"
Your external image constitutes your appearance, although the appearance is justice, but your language will also constitute your "speech value" is the language of the word Oh, otherwise it is the same speech, some people speak, people around them are sleeping, and some people speak with emotion and attraction.
Some communication scientists in the United States have proposed a formula for communication:
Full expression of information during communication = 7% intonation + 38% voice + 55% body language.
The tone of voice is your face, and the voice problem is the depression in the voice.
Body language problems, that is, the use of body language when chatting, and the expression of facial expressions, will make your chat process much more vivid.
Xiaobian recommends that you often practice in front of the mirror, look at yourself in the mirror to speak, observe whether your expression is vivid, and practice more.
You can also record your own voice, listen carefully to the advantages and disadvantages of the sound, learn some vocal techniques, and make your voice more beautiful.
In the process of the first date, the tone should be gentle and gentle, the speed of speech, too fast will appear impetuous, too slow will make people lose the interest in chatting, can not be anxious, will make people more willing to open their hearts, open the topic.
At the same time, in the process of chatting, you can add more tone words, exclamation words, and occasionally do some exaggerated expressions, which will make your entire language system more rich and vivid.
03
Table manners cannot be forgotten
If you are late or cancel the appointment after agreeing to the invitation before going to the appointment, you must notify the other party in advance.
Many girls feel that it is better to be late and will not expose their sense of need too much, but for the first date, it is acceptable to be slightly late for the appointment, but if it is more than 15 minutes, it will give the other party a bad impression of not paying attention to dating.
Don't bring too many personal items with you when you go to an appointment, and first shop with a large bag and then go on a date to show that it is not an appropriate arrangement.
When ordering, you should choose the food you want to eat, if you read the menu and have no clue, you can ask the waiter to recommend the signature dish for you, do not answer "casual, anything, yes, um" echo the perfunctory words, if you want to express respect for the boy, you can tell him what you want to order, which not only emphasizes his role as the east, but also implies your trust in each other.
When eating, the principle is to stay calm, not to make big moves, not to make noises or to hinder others from eating.
Before eating, you can use a tissue to gently wipe your lips, so that you can reduce the traces left on the quilt by lightening the lipstick, drink water, drink wine as much as possible to fix a position to drink, so as not to cover the entire mouth of the cup with lip prints.
In addition, the waiter handed you the meal, or added water and wine to you in time, and said "thank you" with a smile, which can give people the impression of being polite and cultured.
Don't pick and choose things, food can't be sprinkled on the table, and other details should be paid attention to.
In short, keep the mood relaxed, words and deeds should be generous and natural, so as to leave a comfortable and beautiful impression on the other party.
Like a guest, when she met a boy chasing her in college, on the first date, she was rejected by a vote because the boy was eating and spitting. Girls are like this, boys are even more so, and the benefits of good table manners are not only in love.
In addition, the first date should avoid shallow words, know how to stop at the right time, appropriate blank space, and more can affect his heart.
When we date guys, the emphasis is on a good emotional experience. For every 2 hours together, boys will have at least 3 heartbeat sensations, so girls need to promote the relationship when the other party's interest is strong.
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