There is an old Chinese saying: self-cultivation and family rule the country and the world.
What is said is that only by cultivating oneself can a person manage his family well and make an extraordinary career.
Modern society, noisy and impetuous, want to nourish the body and mind, the simplest way is to live a "low decibel" life.
In life, have you also experienced such a scene:
On the bus and subway, I wanted to close my eyes and recuperate for a while, but someone around me has been talking loudly and calling;
In the restaurant, I was enjoying a meal with my friends, but there was a constant noise next door;
At home, I wanted to go to bed early, but I was tossed by the heart-rending noise downstairs until midnight...
Their own hustle and bustle has caused trouble to others, but they are unconscious, and even self-satisfied, which is a manifestation of lack of cultivation.
Liang Shiqiu said that speaking loudly is instinct, and whispering is civilization.
In the volume of a person's speech, hidden in the books he has read and the road he has traveled, reflects a person's cultivation.
Volume and sound quality can even change a person's destiny.
In the movie "Lady", Audrey Hepburn plays a poor flower girl with a rude voice and rude speech.
She shouted and sold out on the street every day, her voice sharp, and was disgustedly called "the woman who makes disgusting and uncomfortable noises".
Later, she met Higgins, a professor of speech, and realized that if she went on like this, she would be poor for the rest of her life.
So he decided to change his spoken pronunciation, improve his language cultivation, and change his destiny.
She took out all her savings and asked Higgins to teach her the art of controlling her voice.
Half a year later, the rude flower girl, her voice became pure and soft, and the person also became elegant and confident.
In the end, sweet love was also harvested.
There is a line in the film that impresses: Listening to the tone and volume of a person's speech, you can determine what class he belongs to.
In real life, a closer look will find that those who raise their voices at every turn and have no scruples often lack cultivation and self-confidence.
The more confident people are, the more they know how to solve problems in a pleasant way, which makes people feel like a spring breeze, and the so-called noble people have a low voice.
There is a line in the movie "Riding the Wind and Waves": You don't need to be so loud, controlling your voice is the most powerful aura.
A university professor once said that when he lived in the professor's dormitory, he could not hear the sound of loud talk between people or husband and wife quarreling for several years, and after moving into the private apartment, he was shocked to find that every day he could hear people talking loudly and hysterical quarrels.
The higher the cultivation, the more decent people are, the more able they are to take care of others and control their emotions.
On the contrary, whether it is a public place or a private space, people who have no scruples and make loud noises generally do not live a satisfactory life.
People who are too noisy often can't become a climate, and keep their voices "low decibels" in order to have an extraordinary life.
Thoreau once said, "Most people live in calm despair." ”
Behind every seemingly calm face, there are unknown grievances and persistence.
Because they know that once the emotions are out of control, the consequences are endless.
My girlfriend Lao Gu works at a consulting company and once met a difficult big customer.
A plan has been revised more than a dozen times, and the other party is still not satisfied.
Seeing that the half-year assessment is approaching day by day, if you can't get this contract, not only will the performance of the department not meet the standards, but also the promotion opportunities of your own will be lost.
Therefore, the old Gu did not sleep, and revised it again according to the customer's requirements.
Unexpectedly, the customer is still not satisfied.
Lao Gu collapsed instantly, threw the plan to the customer, and roared angrily: "If you don't want to cooperate, just say it, don't need to toss people so much, don't think that a little money is great, I don't serve it!" ”
Then, the cooperation was canceled, the old Gu was demoted, and the annual bonus was canceled.
Years later, Lao Gu recalled that experience and laughed at himself: Shouting at every turn is the most stupid and incompetent manifestation.
Life is like this, if you can't be the master of emotions, you can only be a slave to emotions.
Orison Madden wrote in The Capital of a Lifetime:
At no time should all actions be subject to one's own emotions, but should in turn control.
A mature adult knows how to quit his emotions and quietly clean up the mess.
I once saw a Q&A on the Internet.
At what point did you start feeling mature?
There is a highly praised answer: start by learning to control emotions.
Walking in society, a person will inevitably encounter unfair treatment, grievances that are smashed over the face, and even framed and calculated, countless times on the verge of collapse.
When you are powerless to change the status quo, please knock out your teeth and swallow blood, silently put away negative emotions, remain calm, calmly cope, and believe that in time, you will become a winner in life.
Fu Seoul said: "The collapse that cannot be hidden is only a scar, and the collapse that is hidden is a medal." ”
Adjusting emotions to low decibels, joy without words, bitterness without words, anger without hair, mourning without hurt, is the highest ability of adults.
In the American science fiction philosophical novel "Catching Fallen Leaves", there is such a plot:
Humans were created by extraterrestrial intelligence and sent to Earth to experience this life.
But merriam, a female employee, worries that humans will fall in love with Earth and never return.
So she deliberately dug a hole next to the human heart, and used this defect to pull the human being back.
After the male employees who worked with her saw it, they were afraid of the leader's punishment, so they desperately filled the hole.
He injects love, anger, sadness, happiness, all the emotions into that void, trying to fill it.
However, they found that the void representing human desires was never filled.
The male employee said desperately: "No matter how to fill it, we will never be able to give them what they want." ”
"What do they want?" Merriam asked.
"More!"
Yes, the black hole of human desire can never be satisfied.
Looking at the world, how many people have been chasing fame and profit all their lives, and even unscrupulous means to achieve their goals.
In the current situation of consumerism, people's desires are becoming more and more intense: the house is getting bigger and bigger, the car is more and more luxurious, and eating and wearing are becoming more and more exquisite...
Lao Tzu said that there is no greater misfortune than dissatisfaction, and no greater blame than desire.
He told us long ago that the root cause of most evils stems from the weakness of human nature: insatiable greed.
The Qing Dynasty had a poem called "Not Satisfied", which vividly portrayed an image of insatiable greed:
Busy all day long only for hunger, only to have enough to think of clothes.
There is abundant food and clothing, and there are few beautiful wives in the room.
Marry a petite wife and a beautiful concubine, and ride in and out of the carless horse.
Mules and horses are prepared in groups, and the fields are not widely used or supported.
Thousands of acres of good land have been set aside, and no official position has been deceived.
Seven products and five products are still too little, and three products and four products are still too low.
Yipin was the prime minister of the dynasty, and he was also envious of the king as emperor.
He is satisfied with the Son of Heaven, and he hopes that there will be no death in all lifetimes.
There is always a long delusion of endless, a long coffin lid to hold a grudge.
When I was poor and white, I only wanted food and clothing, and after I had enough to feed myself, I wanted to marry a wife, and I had a wife and children, and I felt that I lacked a big house, and I had all the house and the land, and I wanted to be a big official...
More and more you want, your goals are getting higher and higher, and your heart is getting more and more tired.
Many of the pains and anxieties of modern people come from this.
Zhou Guoping said: "As long as a person is willing to restrain his desires and is satisfied with a relatively simple life, the territory of life will be wider." ”
Learn to streamline your desires, to save the essence, to be content and happy, in order to live freely and freely.
Mr. Yang Dai said: The most beautiful scenery in life is the calm and calm in the heart.
For the rest of your life, lower your decibels:
Improve cultivation, lower the volume, and insist on speaking at low decibels;
Enhance internal strength, silent, achieve low decibels of emotions;
Learn to be moderate, put an end to extravagance, and achieve low decibels of desire.
Click to see, may you and I all be in awe, self-discipline, accumulate in time, and live out our own vast mountains and rivers.
The anchor | Appreciate the new qing, video number: appreciate the new qing reading, public number: listen to the sound of the sun.
Pictures | Visual China