No parent under the heavens escapes the anxiety of education, especially for middle-class families.
Many parents plan before the birth of their children, to give their children a variety of early education classes, learn piano, violin, art, programming, ballet, equestrian, golf, fencing, skiing... It all starts with the doll.
Parents' investment in related education can be described as pouring out, regardless of cost.
With the proposal of the national goal of "sports power" in the past two years, the national sports industry has begun to move towards new development, and sports have begun to become a hot focus.
Recently, a movie covering national topics such as children's growth, ice and snow sports, family education and the Winter Olympics, "Ice Moments", has attracted a lot of attention.
The film chronicles the growth of hockey teenagers and the unknown efforts of their parents and families. As director Liu Hanxiang said: "Their life trajectory has changed because of ice hockey, some people choose to go abroad, and some people choose to stay." ”
After more than three years of polishing and production, the film spanned China, Russia, Canada, Sweden and other places, and the material is completely from the real living conditions of several groups of families. The film won the FIRST Youth Film Festival Best Documentary Proposal and was shortlisted for the IDF Westlake International Documentary Conference Venture Capital Project.
The story begins in the summer of 2018, when a club in Beijing reorganized a junior ice hockey team with a group of children born in 2009.
In the past three years, parents have also undergone many changes through the changes of their children and the education and guidance of their children, and they have discovered many limitations from the process of children playing ice hockey. Therefore, both children and parents have improved on this journey.
"Sport changes people's personality, changes people's destiny, and this change is a two-way street." This change surprised the creators.
"It's not so much a movie as it is a valuable home education lesson for all parents." At the Beijing premiere on January 3, CCTV host Li Xiaomeng finished reading his testimonial.
Many netizens also shared their feelings about this film:
Although the film is about ice hockey, it has sparked a series of reflections on education and parent-child relationships:
For these hockey teenagers in the film, some children are interested and dream of becoming professional hockey players, and some are to help their parents realize their dreams.
So, how do parents deal with their children's expensive dreams? In the face of strict coaches and sparring mothers, what are the children's rebellious psychology?
Yu Lifan's father: "You said something bad about me, didn't you?" ”
Yu Lifan: "I didn't say anything bad about you, I said you smoked me." ”
Yu Lifan's father: "I'm in a hurry, because you haven't made much progress lately." Push forward, push forward! Which is the point and which is the front? ”
This is the daily conversation between 9-year-old Yu Lifan and his father.
Yu Lifan attended Beijing Elementary School and played as a striker on the ice hockey team, No. 66.
For the sport of ice hockey, Yu Lifan's father's point of view is: "Boys should play something bloody, Yu Lifan's personality is actually more gentle, we hope to give him some pressure, so that he can be tough." ”
Like many parents, Yu Lifan's father forced his children to compete, projecting his childhood past that was not welcomed by the physical education teacher to the next generation.
During training, Yu Lifan always subconsciously looked at where his father was. When dad trains with him, he is no longer a loving dad, but a strict and demanding coach. The man corrected his movements over and over again, tirelessly. Whenever Dad wasn't happy with his performance, or when he couldn't hold on, Dad would hold on to the club and stand by, as if the next moment he would be the target of a beating.
This made Yu Lifan look cautious and did not dare to return his mouth, and the occasional argument would be quickly suppressed by his father at a louder volume. Parents hate iron and steel, although they do not say anything in their mouths, but in their hearts they still expect their children to achieve good results, whether it is in academics or in terms of interests and strengths.
What's more, like other ice and snow sports, ice hockey is a money-burning sport.
The first is the coaching lesson fee, a "one-on-one" personal training class ranging from 600 yuan to 2000 yuan, "one-to-many" to about 300 to 500 yuan. If it is a foreign coach, the price is more expensive. The second is the cost of equipment, the price of a set of protective gear is between three thousand and ten thousand yuan, a pair of top skates for five or six thousand yuan, and the average one is also three or four thousand. Since the child is in the growth stage and the feet grow fast, the skates need to be changed frequently.
In addition, the cost of playing at home and abroad is another major expense of practicing ice hockey.
A measure of a hockey player's level depends on how many games he has played, not how long he has been training. Therefore, participating in the game is very important for the sport of ice hockey. Roughly estimated, to cultivate an "ice baby", each family costs about 200,000-300,000 yuan per year. If you want to take a career path, ask a professional coach, go abroad for training and competition, and even go abroad to go to school and play ball, spending millions or even more every year.
The sense of speed of ice hockey is unmatched by any other sport. Because it is sliding on ice, the speed of the athletes and the speed of the ice hockey are faster than football and tennis, and they are known as the fastest team events in the world.
Ice hockey allows for physical collisions, is highly competitive, and is therefore more ornamental. Because ice hockey is so intense, the game process has to constantly change people to rest, and each athlete's playing time is only one minute and a few tens of seconds. So, ice hockey is a comprehensive test of speed, skill and courage.
In a park in Beijing, Yu Lifan was practicing to take the ball, and his father's repeated criticism finally attracted his resistance. "You have the ability to try it!" So in the next shot, Dad puts on the goalkeeper's protective gear and blocks in front of the door, and Yu Lifan becomes a challenger. Between attack and defense, the child finally released the resentment he had learned and accumulated over the years, and dismissively responded to his father's "Just this?" "Provocation.
In the time of those dozens of ball shots, Yu Lifan grew up at a speed visible to the naked eye, and took a big step towards "man" like his father expected.
Yu Lifan's father is from the northwest, the family is generally poor, through studying, staying in Beijing to live and work in peace and contentment is already the "end of the universe" he can think of. He hopes that his son can have a broader world in the future, have more choices, and live a little easier, so he is quite strict with his son.
In addition to ice hockey, Yu Lifan's level of Go is also very high. When he was a child, his parents let him try various interest classes, and eventually because of limited time and energy, only ice hockey and Go were left behind, abandoning others.
Three years later, Yu Lifan was successfully selected for the Beijing Youth Ice Hockey Team. It is worth mentioning that Yu Lifan also has a younger brother, when the family asked the younger brother whether he was willing to learn ice hockey, the younger brother directly shook his head and refused, giving the reason that he "did not want to be scolded by his father".
No one would have imagined that the unpopular sport of ice hockey would be so hot these days.
In China's big cities, more and more middle-class families, especially parents of boys, are making ice hockey their first choice for cultivating their children's sports prowess. In addition to physical fitness, they hope that this fierce collective project can help the only children develop tenacious character and a sense of competition and cooperation.
No. 95 Qu Ruichen is also a striker, and his mother is a Beijinger. Most of the time he was cared for by his mother, who worked in the field to earn money.
The family's biggest disagreement stems from the father's and mother's attitudes toward their children's dreams. Every year, hundreds of thousands of dollars are burned and sent to the United States to study and play, so that they have the opportunity to play the world's top professional hockey.
"I've loved ice hockey since I was a kid, I love playing hockey so much, ice hockey is already my dream." Qu Ruichen faced the camera and revealed his heart. The young Qu Ruichen had to train for several hours a day, and even eating, sleeping, and changing clothes could only be done on the car to the training gym, so he asked his mother, "Are you 8 years old or am I 8 years old?" Mom replied to him, "You're hard! When I was a kid, I didn't have the conditions to skate. ”
Qu Ruichen's father said: "If you like ice hockey, you can play amateurs, there is no need to take a career, there is no need to be so serious, because this road is too difficult, too difficult." ”
However, Qu Ruichen asked his father, "Why can't I play professionally?" ”
Qu Ruichen's mother believes that her children do not have to go to college in the future. "I'm definitely going to help him fulfill his dreams."
When struggling with whether to send his children abroad to play, Qu Ruichen's father put forward a soul torture question: "Anyway, I don't agree to go abroad, what is the purpose of raising children?" ”
This question sounds selfish in contrast to a mother's full support for her child's dreams, but who says that parents must give everything for the next generation? Can't parents choose an easier path to nurture the next generation?
Qu Ruichen's grandmother and grandfather are very enlightened, although they are reluctant in their hearts, they also support their grandson to play abroad. Qu Ruichen's mother has moved three times to facilitate her son's training. In order to go abroad and train daily, she enrolled Qu Ruichen in a private school in Beijing, because the school has an international standard ice rink, and ice hockey is also a special sport of the school.
Qu Ruichen's parents have no overseas study and life experience, his mother taught herself English, looked up information about ice hockey schools abroad on the Internet, and hoped that her son would go to the United States to play as soon as possible, and she would also accompany her. In order to help their son realize his dream, they accompanied Qu Ruichen to Russia to participate in short-term training, and also went to Sweden to inspect the ice hockey school.
Interestingly, however, when the film premiered, the director asked Qu Ruichen if he wanted to play in the United States, but he told the director that he now prefers rap. He and his mother are still preparing to apply to study and play in the United States.
Among the three groups of families, the family of Zhai Zinan No. 97 seems to be the most harmonious. Zhai Zinan is also a striker, he has a maturity and determination beyond his age: "I want to play the North American pro game. ”
"The child is becoming more and more determined to be a professional athlete, although this road is very difficult, but the child wants to go, we have to pave the way for him." 」 To this end, Zhai Zinan's mother gave up a good lawyer job, accompanied him to Play in Canada full-time, took care of his life and study abroad, and when he reached a certain age and could live independently, his mother planned to continue working. Dad stayed in The country to earn money to support the family and provide financial support for mother and son.
Zhai Zinan's mother went to the UK to study in high school and stayed in the UK for eight and a half years, so she is very adapted to overseas life, and she is preparing to qualify as a Canadian lawyer. Due to the epidemic, Zhai Zinan's father has not seen his son for more than two years. Every day, they can only alleviate the pain of lovesickness through video chat.
When he first arrived in Canada, Zhai Zinan not only had to adapt quickly to the new environment, but also faced the language barrier, and the long ice hockey and physical training consumed most of his energy. In addition to training, cultural classes cannot be left behind.
Because his mother had a minimum requirement for him: "Whether you play professionally or not in the future, you must go to college." "His mother hired a domestic math teacher to teach him math and Olympiad every week. Faced with the double pressure of academics and training, as well as the expectations and expectations of his parents, Zhai Zinan could not help but leave tears.
No pain, no gain. The road to the future, there are no shortcuts.
It is even more difficult for a middle-class family in China to train a professional athlete than to ascend to the sky. In addition to the child's own natural conditions, the family needs to have strong financial support, both parents must sacrifice at least one side's career as the price, full-time abroad to accompany the sparring, coupled with the time, location, people, by the professional team to see, explore, in order to have the opportunity to embark on the career road.
After all, there are very few Chinese children who can successfully embark on a career path.
And the youngest son of the famous director Yingda, Yingrudi, did it.
Born in Beijing in 1998, YingRudi began to learn piano at the age of 3, began to play ice hockey at the age of 4, and went to Canada and the United States to train and live at the age of 9 accompanied by her mother Liang Huan. Her mother, Liang Huan, gave up her well-developed career in China and became a "reading mother", after which the couple lived a transnational separation for more than a decade.
The expense of the sport of ice hockey is expensive, and Indah said in an interview with the media that from the time his son began practicing ice hockey to now, at least tens of millions have been spent. In order to support her son to play hockey abroad, Yingda had to stay at home and work hard to earn money, and at the first opportunity, Yingda would fly abroad to reunite with his wife and children.
In 2016, Yingrudi participated in the NHL North American Hockey Professional League Draft, but unfortunately failed. Previously, only Song Andong was the only one in China who entered the NHL.
This time, in the upcoming Winter Olympics, YingRudi will lead the team as the captain of the Chinese men's ice hockey team. This is also the first time that the Chinese men's ice hockey team has stood on the stage of the Winter Olympics. The Chinese men's ice hockey team is divided into the "death group" with Canada, the United States and Germany, and the Chinese men's ice hockey team is currently ranked 32nd in the world.
In addition to his own efforts, the aura that Yingru Dysprosium has now is inseparable from the sacrifice and forbearance of the entire family. In this regard, Yingrudi used the term "should be returned but can not be returned" to describe. Yingda once proudly told the media that his youngest son earned millions of dollars a year and was able to support himself.
This story may break down the prejudices and misconceptions of some foreigners about Chinese sports.
China's new generation of parents has changed a lot about their children's concept of sports. They begin to cultivate and train their children's interests and hobbies from an early age, respect their children's choices, and even support their children to take career paths.
Director Liu Hanxiang is also a father, and his daughter is four and a half years old. He revealed that the original intention of the film was his confusion about parent-child education, but after the film, he did not find the answer to the question.
No education method is the most correct, and no one knows which growth path is the best choice for children. Perhaps as Qu Ruichen's mother said: "We will not tell our children the correct answer, because we have exhausted our lives and may also be looking for the right answers to our lives." ”
Everyone has their own life path and life proposition, and in the growth process of these hockey teenagers, the companionship, support and encouragement of parents are undoubtedly the most precious.
In the face of their children's expensive dreams, parents have also struggled, hesitated, and confused, but in the end, they have chosen to support their children to complete their dreams.
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