In 1918, Lu Xun wrote in the article "My Festival of Spirits": "Is the festival of martyrdom suffering? Replied, very bitter.
For such an article of anti-feudal etiquette, Lu Xun has a clear point of view, outstanding personality, and a good saying, "Everyone understands the truth, but it is very difficult to do it." Lu Xun's wife, Juan, may be a typical example.
But whoever had gone to school and read a book had not heard of Lu Xun? What about Lu Xun's wife? Surely many people replied that it was his female student Xu Guangping, so what about Lu Xun's original partner, Juan, and who remembered her?
Zhu An is a Shaoxing native, born in 1878, his ancestors have been Zhi County, he is a scholar, the Zhou family is also an official, the combination of the two can be described as a door to door, in feudal society, such an arranged marriage, is undoubtedly the envy of many people.
But that was the late Qing Dynasty, it was an era that was about to change, and Lu Xun, from rushing to the forefront, may have been doomed from the beginning, And Juan's life will eventually be dedicated to the feudal customs that people hate.
In 1906, Lu Xun was tricked by his mother into returning home and held a wedding with Juan, Juan heard that the groom official liked big feet, on the wedding day, she wore a pair of large shoes, which were stuffed with cotton, but when she got off the car, because the car was high, it did not step on the ground for a while, and the embroidered shoes fell, and everyone could think of such an embarrassing scene.
After a moment of confusion, the embroidered shoes were put on, the wedding continued, surrounded by many visitors, the two worshiped heaven and earth and sent them into the cave room, and the groom lifted the red hood, and a person who had never met before appeared in front of him.
The bride has a yellowish white complexion, pointed chin, thin lips, and a wide forehead.
Lu Xun looked at it and was disappointed, he did not spend the Spring Festival with the bride, but slept alone in the study, many years later, in the face of such a wedding, Lu Xun said calmly: "This is a gift given to me by my mother, I only have an obligation to support, love is something I don't know." ”
On the third day of the new marriage, others were enjoying the sweetness, while Lu Xun left home.
Since then, as a traditional woman, Juan has been accompanying her mother-in-law, what she can't imagine is that this is actually a portrayal of the second half of her life, for her husband, Juan has a kind name: Mr. Big.
If love can wait, then Juan will not be so lonely, day after day, year after year, all time will prove that Juan's hard waiting, in fact, is in vain, there is also a news, Lu Xun has a child, he also has a new wife, her name is Xu Guangping.
When Juan learned that Xu Guangping had given birth to a son, she said desperately: "In the past, Mr. Da and I were not good, I want to serve him well, and the future will always be fine." I'm like a snail, climbing up from the bottom of the wall little by little, and one day I'll climb to the top. But now I don't have the strength, and no matter how well I treat him, it is useless. ”
In a few words, Juan's decades of loneliness have dissipated in the wind.
Even if it is such a complaint, but Juan is generous, she began to be happy for her big husband, and finally had a descendant, for Xu Guangping, she took good care of it, and when she met others, she would smile and say to them: "Mr. Son is also my son." ”
People are not grass and trees, who can be ruthless? However, this truth still did not happen to Juan, even if Juan paid more, Lu Xun would always be like this: "Juan is my mother's wife, not my wife." ”
In 1936, Lu Xun died.
What is unbelievable is that at Lu Xun's funeral, his legitimate wife Zhu An was not present at the scene, which tasted difficult to chew, Zhu An was in his hometown of Beiping, dressed in heavy filial piety, and set up a memorial spiritual seat under the portrait of her husband in the south house of the residence, and also provided the upper room utensils, and the cigarettes, tea and snacks that her husband liked before he died.
This kind of old-time memorial is Juan's mourning.
Lu Xun died, most of the expenses of Zhu An and his mother Lu Rui were sent by Xu Guangping from Shanghai, and sometimes Lu Xun's brother Zhou Zuoren would also send them, but after Lu Rui's death, Zhu An refused Zhou Zuoren's help, and she knew that Mr. Big and Mr. Er had never been compatible.
Even so, Juan and her mother's life is also very difficult, she had to, she decided to sell some Lu Xun books, Xu Guangping learned, immediately looking for someone to see Juan, to stop her practice, Juan said: "You always say to keep Lu Xun's relics well, I am also Lu Xun's relics, why not keep me well?" ”
This accusation carries three points of desolation, three points of despair, and four points of loneliness.
In the end, Juan still did not sell Lu Xun's book, in 1947, Juan completed her lonely life, at the age of 69, her last wish before her death was to be buried with Lu Xun, but did not get her wish.
Throughout Juan's life, it is really inseparable from the word tragedy, and life is like this, what is the cause of it? Some people say it is feudal etiquette, some people say it is Lu Xun, but what is it? I'm afraid I can't tell.