Wen | Zhang Ping
The illustrations | from the web
Last night, I was chatting with a friend and learned that she had just rejected a boy for no other reason than that the boy's body was not as good as her request.
About the situation of this boy, I probably know a little, the family has money, I am also very hard, but unfortunately the height is not high, 170 is not enough, the two people standing together are not as tall as girls.
From the perspective of an outsider, I feel sorry for them, after all, the boys are very good in other aspects, that is, their height does not meet the requirements of their friends.
When it comes to height, many girls have their own insistence, such as below 170 do not consider, expect boyfriends to be taller than 175, and can not be fat.
But the reality is, how many boys meet their requirements?
In addition, how many of these boys who meet the requirements are single? There is also a question of probability.
For such a thing as love, I have not advocated finding the "perfect other half", you must understand that everything requiring perfection will not only be very tiring, but also the difficulty will be greatly increased.
Good feelings should be two imperfect people, trying to go in the perfect direction after being together. After all, while you are picky about your other half, the other party is also picking you.
01.
I saw such a story on the Internet, men and women dating chat, after the boy said hello, the girl asked him a question: You all know my situation, right?
The boy replied, knowing, and adding to his personal situation.
Then the girl replied to her: Since this is the case, then let's get married directly, and the bride price is not needed.
It turned out that the girl had been in love several times, but finally broke up, probably because she was disappointed, too tired, or afraid of wasting more time, so she chose to quickly enter the marriage.
The girl said that as long as the other party's character is no problem, the feelings can be slowly cultivated.
The boy asked her twice: Are you serious? The girl replied: Yes.
In this way, the two people agreed to go to the Civil Affairs Bureau the next day to get a permit.
This is probably the fastest blind date in history, although some people disagree, but I personally support it.
As an adult, in fact, everyone understands very well that since you come out on a blind date, the purpose is to get married quickly, if you still have the attitude of wanting to fall in love, then the blind date will eventually be yellow.
How much do boys hate chasing girls now?
Basically talk about a month without results, 99% of boys will give up, talk about a week of not seeing each other, the probability of boys will choose to disappear.
In relationships, boys are very direct, good or bad, a word thing. If you agree to be together, then we will benefit, if you don't agree, then I'm sorry, I can't afford it.
02.
Some people may question whether men who are not willing to spend this time and patience before marriage can really be happy when they get married. On this issue, it is really difficult to say.
Some people talk about the object of their own conversations for several years, and at the beginning they do care about anything about you, but after a long time, they inevitably begin to be perfunctory.
Although the boy who knows the blind date does not have deep feelings at the beginning, it can even be said that there is no feeling, but through the future together, it is not impossible to cultivate feelings, the key lies in whether the person's character and sense of responsibility are passed.
A man with good character and a sense of responsibility, no matter who marries her, can actually get happiness, in other words, a man with bad character and no sense of responsibility, even if you talk for many years, eventually enter the marriage smoothly, and the probability of happiness is very low.
In the final analysis, marriage is a division of labor, and it is important for both men and women to recognize their role positioning and know what to do and what not to do.
This year, everyone is very busy, busy working to make money, busy raising a family, busy living a better life, for love is indeed less patience, unless you meet someone you particularly like, otherwise most people would rather choose to be single than want to live a good life.
This is also why blind dates can solve the fastest way for young people to get off the list, first because it is fast, secondly because it is convenient, and thirdly because it has an important point, because it is introduced by acquaintances and knows the roots.
03.
The object of their own talk, the other party's family does not understand, this is actually a big hidden danger.
Many girls go to their boyfriend's house to finally discover the terrible part of this family, and the blind date just avoids this at the beginning, and at the beginning, she makes the family lineage clear and clear, avoiding stepping on the pit.
To be honest, falling in love is really tiring. Love is a stage, at the beginning, two people you and me, what do you feel fresh, this time, because of the love period, do what is sweet.
But once the love period has passed, the feelings will enter a flat period, which is actually the most grinding time.
Once it reaches the flat period of feelings, it is easy to expose the shortcomings of both sides, and whether or not you can accept each other's shortcomings has become a very tangled thing.
If you can smoothly accept, or even fall in love with each other's shortcomings, then the feelings can naturally heat up and enter the next step, but if you can't accept it, then the feelings will quickly disintegrate until the end.
Falling in love is risky.
As the girl at the beginning said, love talk is not good, but also tired, since you want to get married, it is better to choose marriage, and then in marriage, to cultivate feelings, breeding so-called love, it is not a bad thing.
Falling in love and then getting married, or getting married first and falling in love after love, depends on the stage you are in, and the needs of this stage.
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About author:Zhang Ping, psychological counselor, marriage and family counselor, well-known emotional self-media. I have wine, do you have a story?