Original Mexico
Source Used to take slow notes
Some people say that once people have weaknesses, they will have weaknesses that are attacked.
My mother, she is not only my weakness, but also my armor.
She was a very ordinary woman.
She is not pretty, nor does she have a high culture, she just warmed my 18 years with the most ordinary love.
She is a girl who was pampered by her grandparents and grew up, but she is a very strong woman in her bones.
That year, she married her father to the countryside and supported the family with three acres of thin land.
She let me know that a person, a pair of hands, can also go very far.
I was a petite treasure raised by her in the palm of her hand, and everyone said that she had spoiled me a little too much, but she never cared, always treated me as always, I asked her why, she said she just understood me a little more.
Many times, people's growth is always in an instant.
I remember that it rained a lot that day, and she was working alone in the fields, and the first time I saw her in the rain, the first time I knew what it was to be sad.
At that time, the family had some financial difficulties, she was at home alone to take care of the family's living, but also to take care of the field and work, she began a very busy schedule.
When she was very tired, she hid herself in a corner of the house and secretly cried, and I stood outside her door and found for the first time that she was also vulnerable.
Then I learned to grow up, learned to try to be a sensible girl, and I also began to want to understand her more, a little more.
When I took the middle school entrance examination in 2017, my spirit was very tense and I was panicked. She suddenly put a soft arm around me as she was taking me into the exam room at home.
"Baby, you see there is light ahead, and as you struggle in the darkness, try a little harder and you will find your own sun."
That year, I walked to the first intersection of my life and slowly began to write my own story.
That year, the gardenia blossoms were fragrant, and I saw the light that belonged to me.
She was like someone behind me, always supporting me.
In 2020, I entered my third year of high school, the time is tight, more is not enough, and when other parents are teaching their children to work hard, I am glad that she never talked to me about learning.
She didn't manage me a lot in my studies, but just let me choose my own path. In my junior year of high school, it was the first time I heard her say such a thing.
"Baby, mom hopes you can have a good future, but I don't want to force you, I don't want to pressure you, I just hope that you can grow into a very good adult, and you must live happily in the future." 」
She is more like my best friend than a mother. I can talk to her a lot, about feelings, about life, and about stories, without estrangement or distance.
In 2020, the arrival of the epidemic has delayed the time of the college entrance examination. That day, she took me to the exam room and said to me:
"There is light ahead, just do what you like."
On the day of the Chinese language test, after I finished writing the essay, I sat in my position and looked at the light refracted by the sunlight outside the window, and there was light in front of me, and I would try to grasp my own sun.
In October 2020, I successfully went on a journey to university and began a wandering trip to a distant place by myself.
The first time I left home, I missed her a lot.
On the first day of school, I watched her get farther and farther away from me, and gradually her eyes became red, and she hid in the toilet alone and cried, only to learn later that she was the same.
There are many interviews on the freshman campus, but the final result is still unsatisfactory, and when I am sad, I can often think of her words, and more often remember the hug she had four years ago.
What a person is most touched, probably all the sad things, are pulling you into the abyss, but there is always a person, from beginning to end, she wants to be your light, to take you to the light.
When I came home from vacation, I turned to the old photos from 20 years ago and saw some of my father's youth past, just the girls in the photos, not her.
Later, this incident became my biggest concern.
Later, I have been thinking that in the days to come, I must take her to many distant places, see a lot of scenery, take a lot of photos, she travels with me, and I still have her youth.
I never believed in the legend of Meng Po, but only for her, I hope to have an afterlife, I hope that in the next life, I can still meet her.
She was my armor and protected me for 18 years, and I was lucky enough to be her child and loved by her in this life.
In 2021, the first day of the holiday rush to her, I gave her a hug, just like the hug she gave me many years ago, and under the embrace is a deep miss.
Today, I write these words just to tell her:
"Mom, there is light ahead, I hope you can walk slowly, wait for me, wait for me, wait for me to have the ability, to be your armor, to be the light of your life, to love you for the rest of your life." 」
- end -
Author: Mo Xi, a college student and a lover of literature.
(This article is reprinted with permission from the former slow note public account)