This article is designed to ease anxiety for stay-at-home and part-time moms.
More and more mothers join the full-time team, in addition, there are children, have to find a job that does not seem to have any technical content of the part-time mother, although mothers for the children do not feel aggrieved, but inevitably panic, always feel that they do everyone will, as if at any time will be eliminated by society.
In fact, this is not necessary, here I want to share a passage of Lian Yue's words: "The biggest misunderstanding of the ability is that I think I should master irreplaceable skills, once I see what I do, everyone will, can be replaced at any time, how can you not panic?" In terms of skills, there is no irreplaceable person, even a genius. Most of the things that geniuses do, like ordinary people, are not highly technical. What is truly irreplaceable is feelings, love, and hearts. ”
Mothers temporarily give up the development of their careers for the long-term development of the family, this love is irreplaceable, mothers do not question their own value.
I know that although these words make mothers very happy, they do not completely reassure mothers, children will one day no longer need our daily care, then the society still needs us? Where is our way out?
Of course, there is a way out, there is more than one, let me introduce three ways out for ordinary mothers.
This is one of my future plans, maybe many mothers will be very indignant when they see this, thinking that they have given up their careers for their children, why should they bring children to their children? Do you only have children for the rest of your life?
Don't worry, this advice is only for moms who are enjoying having children, including me.
While stay-at-home moms are a seemingly risky and depressing job, there are plenty of moms who find meaning and fun in it and enjoy the job and go out to earn money only for financial reasons.
For such mothers, choosing to take care of grandchildren is equivalent to the optimal allocation of family resources.
Anthropologists have found that in the long history of human beings, human beings have relied on other female family members and relatives and friends to bring up their children together, and the nuclear family composed of two parents to raise children is actually a new phenomenon in human history.
Although grandparents help to take children has been criticized by various kinds, it is undeniable that in the process of China's urbanization, we need the help of our grandparents, and from the perspective of the long-term development of a family, it is reasonable for grandparents to take children.
A large percentage of mothers are forced to become stay-at-home mothers because their children are not cared for by the elderly, and if they had a grandparent who liked to take care of their children, they could have developed their careers.
And some old people do not like to take children, but can not bear their children too much pressure and have to lend a hand, the result is that the elderly do not live their own satisfactory old age, young people feel guilty, to the life of a shadow.
So having an ancestor who likes to bring children is simply a blessing for a family.
Doing what you love is doing your children a great favor, is there anything more fun than that?
It is just that we must understand that there is a difference between bringing children and bringing grandchildren, parents play a leading role in the education of children, and grandparents should focus their work on taking care of children's lives, and give the right to teach to the parents of children in a complete way.
Of course, this also reminds you that living in the present and doing a good job as a stay-at-home mother is your work experience in the future.
As for part-time mothers, there is no need to worry, live seriously in the moment, and doing a good job at hand is an excellent way out.
Since we have chosen to focus on children, then our return is the time to accompany children, children grow up healthy in our company, we should be grateful for giving us enough time to accompany children's work, and seriously complete their work.
Many working mothers and fathers who have elderly people helping to bring their children are also doing ordinary work, so why should you be too embarrassed about yourself?
As for worrying that you or the industry you are engaged in in the future will be eliminated, it is a mistake to stand in the current environment and panic about the future.
When you were a child, the teacher asked you to write an essay on "me in twenty years", you can imagine driving the clouds and moving to the moon, but now the profession of bus driver has not disappeared.
You never imagined that in this era of high-tech booming, the two seemingly unskilled industries of express delivery and takeout can feed so many people.
There is only one necessary condition for our happiness, and that is the courage to live in the moment.
The saying of life plan b is what I saw in Zhou Ling's "Cognitive Drive", this plan b, that is, we have another life goal or pursuit outside the main business, which can allow us to fill in leisure, eliminate boredom, and even create achievements.
Developing a life plan, whether it is for full-time moms or part-time moms, is a way out worth choosing.
My two children were raised by me, I naturally know how busy and tired the stay-at-home mother is, even if they are now in elementary school, I am not relaxed, and when Xiaobao has lunch at school next year, I will have to go to work, I imagine how busy I will be in the future.
But when I saw the statement in the book, I was still excited to jump up, because this is the life I wanted!
Even when my children are very young, if I have this realization, I am willing to allocate my precious time and energy to start my life's b plan.
Because having a life plan means that I have my own secret garden, have a thing that I can't wait to do when I think about it, and I no longer have to be afraid of being lonely when I am unaccompanied, nor do I have to worry about my children losing my sense of value when they grow up.
This b plan for me may be Chinese medicine, translation, writing, Chinese noodles, which I am already interested in, or it may be something else that will appear in the future, although it is not sure yet, but I have begun to try it continuously, I believe it is also about to appear.
If you're as passionate about life as I am, get started.
Maybe you'll say you don't know what your other life pursuits are, or maybe you'll say you're too busy and tired to stick with it.
But I believe that if you really want to have a life with a plan, you will overcome these difficulties.
Because most importantly, you want a life like this.
Of course, there are more than three ways out for full-time mothers and half-time mothers, I write these, just to tell mothers that the times will not casually abandon you who take life seriously, let go of anxiety and love yourself.
Thank you for your reading time.