Excerpt from The Quest for the Meaning of Life by Victor Frank
In September 1942, Victor Frank, a prominent Jewish psychiatrist and neurologist, together with his wife and parents, was arrested by the Nazis and escorted to concentration camps. When he was rescued from the camp 3 years later, his pregnant wife and most of his family were long gone, but he survived. In 1946, he spent 9 days writing about his experiences in the concentration camp and publishing it. In this best-selling book, In Search of the Meaning of Life, he summarizes the difference between life and death: that is the meaning of life. It was an epiphany of his early life. When he was in high school, a teacher who taught science stood on a podium and told them, "The course of life is like burning, it's just a process of constant oxidation." Frank immediately bounced up from his chair and retorted, "Sir, if life is really like this, then what is the meaning of life?" ” During his imprisonment, he found that even living in this most frightening environment, once the meaning of life was found, a person's ability to survive was greatly improved. He wrote in His Book of Life: "Here everything from one's most precious life to one's most insignificant object can be easily taken away. Here, we are retained only the last bit of freedom in human nature, which is to determine our own attitude to life and determine our own way of life in any given environment. ” Frank worked as a doctor in a concentration camp. In the book, he mentions two prisoners in the camp who wanted to commit suicide. Like the rest of the people in the camp, the two men had long since felt disheartened and had nothing to love. Frank writes, "In both cases, I need to make them realize that they are still expected by certain people and that they still have a future worth waiting for." One of them is the father of a child. His children are already living abroad. The other is a scientist who has a series of books to complete. ” Frank goes on to write: "Each individual distinguishes itself from one another precisely through its own uniqueness and uniqueness. It is these two characteristics that associate the meaning of each person's existence with creative work and human love. When a person realizes that he is irreplaceable, he will realize the responsibility he has in the world, and he will carry this responsibility forward. When a person realizes that he needs to bear the warmth of others, when a person realizes that he needs to complete an unfinished business, he will never give up his life. Because he already knows the meaning of his survival, he can face any challenge ahead. ” In 1991, the Library of Congress and the Monthly Reading Club listed The Search for the Meaning of Life as one of the ten most influential books in the United States. The book has been distributed in millions of copies worldwide. The essence of the book: the exploration of the meaning of life, the experience of the value of suffering, the assumption of responsibility to transcend the self, all of which seem to be incompatible with our current culture. Rather than thinking about the meaning of life, we are now more willing to pursue the happiness of the individual. Frank writes in the book: "Unlike European culture, this is a characteristic of American culture: everyone is constantly urged to pursue happiness. But happiness is unattainable. Happiness only comes with something, and one must have a reason to 'be happy'. ”
Research proves that pursuing a meaningful lifestyle can comprehensively improve a person's happiness level and life satisfaction, and promote physical and mental health, improve resilience, improve self-esteem, and reduce depression. Ironically, those who blindly pursue happiness feel unhappy. A recent study showed that, as Frank put it, the excessive pursuit of happiness actually hindered the advent of happiness.
This is why scholars oppose the blind pursuit of happiness. In Positive Psychology, there is a recent study in which psychologists surveyed nearly 400 Americans between the ages of 18 and 78 to ask them if their lives were meaningful (or happy). In a month-long survey, the researchers analyzed many other variables, such as the respondents' evaluation of their own happiness and their views on the meaning of life, combined with the subjects' stress levels, consumption habits, whether they have children, and found that meaningful and happy lives have some commonalities, but they are still different. Psychologists conclude by saying that in a happy life, "get" more; in a meaningful life, "give" more.
What is the difference between a happy life and a meaningful life? Researchers have found that a happy life usually means feeling good. Specifically, those who feel happy feel that life is comfortable, that they are in good health, and that they are able to buy what they need. When you are shy, you will feel that life lacks meaning and happiness declines. Money has a significant impact on their happiness. A happy life can be defined as a life with little stress and trouble.
In society's view, those who blindly pursue happiness have a distinctive characteristic, that is, selfishness. As mentioned earlier, they only want to "get" but do not know "give". Psychologists give a further explanation: happiness is the satisfaction of desires. If you have a desire or need, such as you feel hungry, you eat food, fill the hunger, then you feel happy. People feel happy, in other words, their desires are satisfied.
"Those who only pursue happiness become happy if they receive benefits from others. But those who seek meaning in life enjoy pleasure in giving to others. Catherine Wirth, one of the study's authors, said in a public lecture at the University of Pennsylvania. In other words, while those who pursue happiness are busy satisfying their endless desires, those who seek meaning in life have long since transcended themselves. Those who seek a higher meaning of life are more willing to reach out and help those in need. The researchers write: "In short, the pure pursuit of happiness means only turning a blind eye to those in need." ”
Participants in the study cited many experiences of giving themselves to helping others and sacrificing themselves for the good of the group to gain meaning in life. In the words of Martin Seligman, a top surviving psychologist, pursuing a meaningful life is "to use all your strength and talents to be loyal to and serve something beyond yourself." "To give a few examples, buying gifts for others, caring for children, and giving insights are all ways to pursue a more meaningful life. Those whose lives are more meaningful will often actively pursue the meaning of life, even if they know it is at the expense of their own happiness. Because they have thrown themselves into a cause that is higher than themselves. They have more worries, a higher stress index, and more anxiety than those who feel happy. Raising children, for example, is a meaningful life experience, but it also means self-sacrifice. Many parents, including the researchers, do not have a high happiness index.
Baumeister told me in an interview: "To a certain extent, as human beings, we have to care about others and contribute to others. This brings meaning to our lives, but it does not necessarily make us happy. ”
The meaning of life is not only beyond the self, but also beyond time and space — according to the researchers, this is perhaps the most important finding in the study. Happiness is just an emotion that exists in the here and now, and eventually it dissipates like any other emotion. These positive effects and emotional pleasures are fleeting. People's reports of happiness are all time-related, but not all reports of the meaning of life.
At the same time, on the other hand, the meaning of life is permanent. It connects the past, present and future. "Thought transcends the present, connecting the past and the future, and it is connected to a meaningful but unhappy life," the researchers write. Happiness, on the other hand, is hard to find in thinking about the past and the future. In other words, people who focus on the present will live happier lives. Correspondingly, although those who think more about the past and the future will feel more pain, struggle more, and enjoy a lower sense of happiness, they will live more meaningfully.
Frank learned a lot of wisdom from his early experiences and the inhuman torture he endured while locked up in concentration camps: "Human beings always go in a certain direction when they survive in the world, and this direction may point to someone, maybe to something, but a person's actions are more for others than for themselves." Maybe it's to pursue some meaning, maybe it's to meet someone. The more one forgets oneself—the more one burns oneself for the sake of the ones one loves, the more one loves one becomes. ”
Baumeister and his colleagues agree that human beings are born with a unique life in search of the meaning of life. Put self-interest aside and serve someone or something that transcends the self. More "give", less "take". We are not just expressing the most basic human nature, we should also admit that the pursuit of happiness is not the whole meaning of life.