Source: Changle Court
Transferred from: Fujian High Court
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"Is it worth it?"
In the bright courtroom, Old Lin had knocked down the gavel of the closed court. In the face of the prosecutor's accusation, the defendant Lao Chen, who never said a word, suddenly asked questions, as if muttering to himself, and like a final statement.
"What's worth it?" Old Lin was stunned and asked the county leader who had been prosecuted for accepting bribes.
"Judge Lin. You're almost 40 years old this year. ”
Without waiting for Lao Lin to reply, the former leader said to himself, "Man forty, it is too difficult." ”
He sank into infinite nostalgia and sighed again, "Do you know why I'm collecting that money?" ”
"Actually, I'm not short of money, really." There was a strong reluctance in his eyes, "I am also a party member, I know discipline, and Kong Fansen is my example." ”
"What a beautiful ideal to serve the people."
"My original dream was to be a blue sky."
Without waiting for Lao Lin to answer, the former county leader continued to say excitedly, "Who didn't want to do a big cause with enthusiasm at the beginning?" ”
"But this blood, it will be cold."
"I have learned from a young age and have always been 'someone else's child'. Enjoy the gaze of countless adoration and pursuit. ”
"But it's gone, it's gone."
"When I first became a civil servant, there were voices of praise and envy everywhere. But five years, ten years... The praise is gone, and the envy is gone. ”
"Thirty years old, barely able to support a family of three." But is it enough? ”
"Not enough, really, far from enough."
"On the tenth anniversary of my marriage, I could only drag my wife to the street food stall to celebrate."
The classmates who used to look down on me turned into big businessmen who came to invest, and they let me drink by name.
"Year after year, my titles range from class president, to Brother Chen, to Old Chen. All I heard was disdain, ridicule... with compassion. ”
"Is this still me?" That celestial pride? The whole village wants? I'm not reconciled! ”
The former county leader looked more and more excited, and Old Lin just looked at him quietly.
"Do you know what shakes me the most? A few years ago, a colleague of mine, a deputy mayor in his thirties, had a great future because Kaidi was dismissed. Is it worth it? ”
"On the one hand, it is a little looser in the hand, one eye is closed, and the one who comes to do things, money, prestige, and everything; on the other hand, it is foolish to serve the people, to be sympathized with and ridiculed and even looked down upon, is it worth it?"
"No one cares what you give!"
"Is it worth it! Is it worth it! Is it worth it! ”
The former county leader questioned Lao Lin with a twisted face.
"Someone cares." Old Lin still looked calm.
Forty men, who didn't come that way.
"My efforts, at least as a child, I will care."
"I would care if I was 8 years old." Old Lin remembered his 8-year-old self, and the seeds of Bao Qingtian sprouted in his heart.
"I would care if I was 16 years old." At the age of 16, after learning about the deeds of Justice Mei Ruzhang, he aspired to become a justice who served the people.
"At the age of 23, I will also care." From the university to the grassroots frontline, to become a small clerk, since then, the original intention of fair trial and justice for the people has not changed.
"Forty men." Old Lin and the former county leaders looked at each other. "Although I did not become a big hero like Bao Qingtian, who dreamed of when I was a child, I did not have any vigorous deeds. But I still remember it. ”
"I remember the joy of helping the elderly who came out of retirement age to work to get back a salary of 4,400 yuan."
"Remember the heartache of sentencing $800 a month in alimony for an elderly mother who is not welcomed by her children."
"Remember to exhort the hatred of juvenile delinquents not steel."
"Remember the self-encouragement when sentencing offending officials."
"Come to think of it, when I was a child, I would not be disappointed in who I am now."
"But what about you?"
Old Lin slapped the table hard.
"Bitter? difficult? ”
"Right now, my colleague! Judges in the west, braving the scorching sun and carrying the national emblem, crossed mountains and mountains, and rode across the river. If it weren't for some accidental photos, who knows their names, who knows their sufferings and hardships. What are they drawing? ”
"What about you? From the moment you become a civil servant, your income is higher than that of the majority of the people, and when you become a leader, you will be treated more generously than most ordinary people. ”
"There are 1.4 billion people in China, some are poor, some are rich. At the beginning, your head was low, thinking about how to get rid of poverty and get rich. But when will you start, with your head held high, and run alone to the bright world? Are you worthy of the masses who believed in you, to yourself when you deeply believed in you as a child? ”
"Not difficult! It is not unwillingness, it is that you have forgotten your original intention and forgotten your mission! ”
"That's it." Old Lin flicked his fingers on the table, "The people's trial of you is over." ”
"But your own trial has only just begun."
"Someone will care."
At that moment, Old Chen's tears flowed like a pillar.