Fate is always elusive, sometimes it will make two unrelated people have an inextricable connection, sometimes it will make the person who fell in love become a stranger, time goes around, maybe the person who has not ended your fate will still meet, and something unexpected will happen.
I don't know what kind of mentality it is to meet my first love again after many years of marriage and children, and whether I can deal with it calmly.
My surname is Li, I am in my 40s this year, my husband and I have been married for sixteen years, I have met him on a blind date, I have been in a relationship five times before I met him, and even when I met him, I still had a relationship that did not end.
After graduating from college, many girls have been married one after another, and gradually my parents began to urge me, kissing several times, I was very excited, I can only say that my mind is not on this. But there was a person in the back whose parents kept advising me to marry, because they had two civil servants in their family, and he was also one of them, and his mother was also a member of the establishment, and they had a stable job and a good income and welfare. In fact, when I heard this, I was a little disappointed, my parents did not seem to choose a marriage partner for me, but just chose a "marriage partner" for them. I was a little bored, but in the end I chose him.
Others are very good, is a little wooden, or emotionally not so much experience, the first time we met, or some ugly, in order to show themselves in front of me, make themselves embarrassed, he is not annoyed, just silly smile to ease the embarrassment. As a veteran of the love scene, he is really boring, but on the one hand, his perception is OK, after all, people are good, and on the other hand, the pressure of my parents makes me have no choice.
Before I fell in love, I also dreamed of love, and I also talked about a heart-to-heart love. At that time, I was only in high school, my first love was excellent, and we were all very simple at that time, and we liked to sit on the back of the bicycle and smell the washing powder on his clothes, perhaps because I liked him.
It's just that in high school, it is not allowed to fall in love, this matter is known by our teachers after both parents have come, my parents have no power, only to deal with it on the side, which makes me feel that the adult world is just like this, and high school is also divided into three, six, nine and so on, but high school is because of grades, adults because of social status.
After this incident, he transferred schools, and I was later admitted to a good school. Because I am still very beautiful, successively talked about several times in love, it seems to be tasteless, people can not raise interest, but there are many people who chase me, each time soon after the breakup, I randomly picked a to continue to fall in love, as if all the likes were given to the original teenager, so now I can't like anyone.
Later, after graduation, I met my husband, forced to get married due to the situation, the life after marriage is not good but not bad, the good thing is that the family's environment and economic conditions are good, the children are also well-behaved and sensible, and I also do my duty for this family. The bad thing is that sometimes the husband may be in a high-powered habit, and when he is unhappy, he always likes to suppress people and make people have to listen, which makes me very painful, and the in-laws are not very kind to see me, after all, I am like the kind of woman that others say fly to the branches and become phoenixes, but in his family these grievances can only be suffered silently.
Later, I repeatedly told my parents that I wanted to divorce, but my parents still advised me that divorce is a second marriage, and it is not easy to marry again, and they have this condition, how do you find it later. The reasons for their persuasion are always these, but I have no way to refute them.
With the passage of time, more than ten years have slowly become accustomed to it, not to mention that the children have grown up, and the idea of divorce has gradually gone down.
Until I met my first love on my way to work, the world was so small, I still met him when I went around. His company is not far from my work and he is still an executive, he was very good at the beginning, and now I am not surprised to have such an achievement, and in order to avoid embarrassment, we all have the initiative to contact each other, but it seems that we all want to contact each other, and the scene that has been seen after seeing him has come to my mind from time to time.
Later we still met, and since then we have been out of control, we are all people with families, and every time I tell him to be restrained, for the sake of our families on both sides, but each time we can't beat a message or a phone call, and gradually we are getting deeper and deeper.
If it had appeared a few years ago, maybe I would have made up my mind to divorce, but now I am extremely embarrassed in it, I am afraid of being discovered by my husband, in fact, divorce is not a difficult problem for me, mainly the problem of children. But I don't divorce, and my relationship with him is even if the East Window incident occurs one day, I also thought about disconnecting, but once the infidelity began, it was difficult to get over. My first love may not be able to give up in this life.
Fate goes around, maybe it's good karma, maybe it's bad karma, it always makes some people start over, but they don't know how. And how it ends.