63-year-old aunt: Living with her son, she is doing the work of a nanny, and she has to rely on herself for the elderly

1.

I am Liu Pinxiu, 63 years old, has been retired for eight years, and now I live with my wife and children with my son.

My wife and I, who have had a daughter and a son in our lifetime, have both become a family.

The eldest daughter, Xu Yinghua, married far away in the south, can't see her several times a year, but the children are happy, and we are also at ease.

His son, Xu Yinghao, works locally, and because of his late marriage, his children are only three years old.

When I retired eight years ago, my son was not yet married, and I had time to go out and take a look around.

After another two years, my wife and children also retired, and the two of us went sightseeing together and finally enjoyed our old age.

But all this has to change from the marriage of the son and the pregnancy of the daughter-in-law.

Daughter-in-law Zhao Yue is pregnant, and her daughter-in-law is busy with work, so my wife and I often take care of my daughter-in-law.

At first, it was fine, our two families lived close together, and I went to my son's house to cook and do housework.

We don't live together, but there are not so many contradictions.

2.

After the grandson was born, the son said that he would let me and my wife take care of the child.

At that time, I was 60 years old, and my wife and children were already 63 years old, so I came to their house to take care of the children for the sake of my son.

During the month, my son invited my sister-in-law, and I was more relaxed, but when I left the confinement and my sister-in-law left, I became more and more powerless.

Originally, I had some high blood pressure, slept with my grandson, often stayed up late, and my body could not bear it.

Sometimes I occasionally complain to my son for a sentence or two, and my son comforts me a few times, but he complains too much, and my son doesn't care.

"Mom, I know you're tired, and when you're tired, you'll rest, and besides, won't you just take a child?" How tired can it be! ”

After the daughter-in-law's maternity leave, she went back to work, and day and night, the children were carried by me and my wife.

During the day, I have to take my grandchildren, wash and cook and do housework, and my wife and children can take the handle.

At night, my son and daughter-in-law were tired from work, and when they came back to tease the child, they rested, and I had to sleep with the child in my arms.

The children have to drink milk at night, and my wife and I have to get up a few times a night, feed and change diapers.

Gradually, my wife and I couldn't stand it anymore, and at this time, my son and I made an opinion.

"Hero, my body and your father's body really can't stand it." Or, a babysitter? ”

As soon as the son heard it, he was anxious, "Mom, how much does it cost to hire a nanny now, we still have to pay off the mortgage and car loan, where is the money?" ”

In any case, the son did not agree. Every time I push my grandson downstairs for a walk, everyone is envious.

"Oh, Sister Liu has come down to play with the children again!" It's so good, your son and daughter-in-law are really good. ”

"I heard that your sons and daughters-in-law have to pay for your living expenses, unlike us, who have to pay for it themselves."

"Yeah, yeah, you see this dress on your body, this bracelet on your hand, you bought it for your daughter-in-law, right?"

Other mothers-in-law said enviously, this is also the truth, the daughter-in-law is also a good child, often buy us some things.

3.

Sometimes when I think about it, compared with others, we are indeed blessed, but only we know the bitterness of this.

The child is sick, like a cold. The son and daughter-in-law came back in a panic, "Mom, what's the matter, what happened to Xiao Jie?" ”

My wife and I looked at them with sad faces, "Xiao Jie suddenly had a fever, and the doctor said it was pediatric pneumonia." ”

The son was anxious to look at his son, and casually said, "Mom, how do you take care of Xiao Jie, the children can't see it well!" ”

His tone was urgent, and I felt uncomfortable in my heart, and my wife was also uncomfortable. None of us want our children to get sick!

My daughter-in-law saw that my face was not right, and comforted me: "Mom, don't listen to the hero's nonsense, he is a little anxious!" ”

I nodded and went with my wife and children to get medicine for my little grandson, but I was really a little panicked in my heart.

Every time the child is a little bad, I will blame my wife and me for not looking good, but we are also very tired.

When I am older, I can't keep up with my movements, plus my own health is not good, and I don't always manage it well.

When the child was one or two years old, he began to learn to walk, and sometimes he fell and stumbled, and we were also very distressed.

But when the son came back every day, he only teased the child, and did not say that he was in charge of the child.

The daughter-in-law wanted to sleep with the child in her arms, and the son thought that the child cried at night, saying that the child slept the same as us.

Now that I think about it, sometimes the son is not as upset as the daughter-in-law, and everyone says that it is to bring the child to the daughter-in-law.

But think about it, it is to bring a child to the son, we are also distressed about the son, only to bring the child.

But now, the son does not know that he hurts us, and because his son comes to complain about us.

4.

In this way, I insisted until my grandson was more than three years old, and my wife and I finally opened our mouths to propose to my son.

"Yinghao, my body and your father's body really can't stand it, now that Xiao Jie is in kindergarten, we have to go home and live!"

The son was anxious when he heard it, "Mom, you go home and live, what will Xiao Jie do?" Where do we have time to pick it up? ”

I thought about it for a moment and said, "I know you're busy at work, you go to deliver your children yourself in the morning, and we'll pick you up in the afternoon." ”

But the son is not willing, he does not want to get up early to send the child, in the past few years he has not cared about anything, the child has grown up.

Now let him get up early to pick up the child, how could he be willing? But my wife and I insisted that we must go back to live on our own.

"Mom, you are old, how inconvenient it is to go back to live, I am not at ease, ah, live together can still have a care!"

My son began to retort to me again, the daughter-in-law did not speak on the side, and she generally did not speak about the affairs of the family.

But no matter what my son said, I didn't want to live with them anymore, my son said.

It's just that he wants us to make him a meal, clean up the house, and he can go to work in peace.

In the end, we insisted, and my son had to agree to our decision, and we went back to our own house.

For the first time in more than three years, I slept a full night's sleep without worrying about my child kicking the quilt and getting cold.

For more than three years, I finally didn't have to get up early to make milk powder for my children to make complementary food, and I didn't have to be busy doing housework.

We were two old, we could eat something and do something, and there wasn't so much housework for two people, so I finally relaxed.

5.

After the people in the community knew that I had returned, they still said to me, "You, don't know how to enjoy happiness, is it bad to follow your son for the elderly?" ”

I smiled and didn't speak. Because they all say, "Don't show your son children now, they don't care about their children when they're old!" ”

Listening to their words, I felt very uncomfortable in my heart, and I don't know when I saw my grandson and the pension linked.

It seems that as long as the old man does not show his son the child, the son does not have to retire for the old man.

But when do you think about it? Parents raise their children, it is already a painstaking effort.

Now we have to support our son's children, and we have to serve our sons and sons, and it is good for our sons to be grateful, but it is really sad not to be grateful.

Of course, if the child needs help, we as parents cannot stand idly by.

After all, life is too difficult now, and the children have to pay off their mortgages and go to work.

When we elderly people have the ability, help our children, but also help ourselves in the future.

Only when the children's lives are good can we give us a better pension.

Otherwise, the children themselves can not repay the loan, their own repayment is not good, how to give us a pension?

But children must also be grateful and take on the responsibilities of the family themselves.

6.

The elderly should not be too persistent, and when it is time to let go, let the children live on their own.

Even if it is with children, don't say that you bring children to your daughter-in-law every day, in fact, we bring grandchildren.

It's all because I feel sorry for my son, so I don't complain about my daughter-in-law, but I think my son is not doing well.

He felt that our efforts were deserved, and it was really chilling that his daughter-in-law hurt us.

Others say that I bring children with my son's house, it is a blessing, it is a pension, but only I know.

The hardships of this, we still have a pension, the days are still like this, those rural elderly, the days are even more difficult.

In fact, parents are not old enough to move, and they will not be willing to let their children retire.

It's just that some children don't know how to reciprocate, only know how to blindly ask for it, and take the old people's efforts as a matter of course.

I advise all the elderly to help their children when they need help, when they are still capable.

This is actually helping ourselves in the future, even if the children will give us a pension, but they are not willing in their hearts after all.

Because when they were most difficult and needed, their dearest parents did not help.

All children are advised to take on the responsibilities of the family and not to squeeze the last energy of the elderly.

People are old, sometimes they may have limited mobility, sometimes they are slow to do things, and please understand more.

Because everyone has the day of old age, think about the patience of your parents with you when you learned to walk when you were a child.

May the elderly in the world be able to rely on the elderly.