You'd have a hard time finding information about the course on social media.
Text | Xie Chan Edited | Hu Wenwen
Images courtesy of respondents
When he clicked the mouse and applied to upgrade his "Queer Culture: History, Media and Society" course from a general elective to a core general elective for undergraduates, Wei Wei, a sociology professor at East China Normal University, was a little nervous: Will it be approved? But unexpectedly, his application was quickly approved, and of course the school also gave suggestions for further improvement and promotion.
But you'd be hard-pressed to find information about this course on social media. In fact, whether it is Wei Wei, a gay scholar who studies the problem of comradeship in a small number of countries, or such a class with sexual minorities as the main body of research, it rarely enters the public eye.
And that doesn't mean the class is small. In the university's Tieba Bar, "Listening to Wei Wei talk about sex" was listed by students as one of the must-do things for teachers in China. Every time there is a class, the large classroom of more than 100 people is always crowded.
(Wei Wei's classroom)
Many of the students who insist on attending are sexual minorities, and their presence seems to be a reminder that many people really need such classes.
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Wei Wei's classes generally start at 6 p.m. After dinner, Liang would walk along the road out of the canteen and walk all the way to the Three Teachings. There were many trees on the road, and the dry cold wind blew through, and it was the most relaxing moment of her day.
The first time she went to class, she and Wei Wei walked side by side for a while, until she entered the same classroom, she realized that this young man wearing a casual suit and with a large muscle was originally Teacher Wei.
That semester, "Queer Culture" was not opened, and she chose Wei Wei's "Sex, Society and Health". There were not many people, and there were about 20 people sitting in the classroom. She couldn't remember what Wei Wei's first sentence was, but she still remembered the feeling he gave people: "As soon as I opened my mouth, people felt very chatty." ”
The first thing Wei Wei said in the class was: "The scale of our course may involve some controversial content, and if you can't accept it, your classmates can withdraw from the class." ”
Someone did get up and quit the class on the spot.
As one of the few gay scholars in China who studies the issue of comrades, Wei Wei feels that if he can "promote sex and gender education to the best of his ability and disseminate positive, scientific and beneficial knowledge and information", of course, it is the most ideal result, but this cannot be forced. Wei Wei determined that what he could do was to give sexual minority students a platform for "self-knowledge, self-acceptance, safe discussion, and equal dialogue".
(Introduction to queer culture course)
Liang briefly recalled that when the students discussed in class, because it involved some relevant personal topics, including coming out in class, the discussion was sometimes very intense, but everyone could basically look at each other's different views equally.
Lu Xiao had followed Wei Wei since graduate school, and when asked about the influence of her mentor on her, she found it a little difficult to answer. After all, in the era of information development, young people like her have long completed the enlightenment of sexual and gender consciousness, and the process of self-struggle has long passed.
But Wei Wei is still willing to open this course, every year, the classroom is always much more people than the people in the system to choose courses, and many of the auditors who quietly come and quietly leave are sexual minorities.
His classes are always open to them: those who, like when he was young, crave someone to talk to, someone to solve, and even just want to see the existence of groups to counteract anxiety and pain. Wei Wei believes that "if they can be "positively impacted" by their peers in the classroom and straighten out their lives in the long life to come, this will be the significance of the existence of this lesson." ”
(Interact with guests in class)
Recalling Wei Wei's class, many people are most impressed by the "authentic, open, equal, and inclusive" classroom atmosphere that flows out of every detail.
Qin Shan saw Wei Wei and the guests sitting on the table joking with each other, the guest said, "Wei Wei, your class is really boring enough, it is all those few things", Wei Wei laughed embarrassedly, did not get angry, and only replied, "Yes, I still have a lot to learn." "
Wei Wei explored how to get along with his students, and he once asked Lu Xiao, "Do you want me to take you on projects like other teachers?" Lu Xiao said, "It's good to be like this now." ”
In Wei Wei's view, if there are occasional times when there is an asymmetry between teachers and students, it should also be: "I am their cheerleaders and cheer them on." ”
From "their world"
To "Our World"
17 years ago, when Wei Wei decided to focus his doctoral dissertation on gay research, his supervisor approached him and had a very serious conversation.
The fellow comrade's mentor did not dare to start doing research on comrades until he had received a tenured teaching position. He was worried that Wei Wei would face great risks in the future and would not even be able to find a job.
Wei Wei's parents were both intellectuals, and during the transoceanic phone calls in those days, they kept asking Wei Wei repeatedly, why did they do this research?
It was 2004, and in the world of Chinese Simplified publishing, he could not find a second book about homosexuality except for Li Yinhe's Their World: A Perspective on The Chinese Gay Community.
He wanted to do the research himself. A state media report on the Chengdu gay community's ANTI-AIDS campaign gave him strength, and for the first time he knew that there were such gay communities and organizations in China. He thought, "The problem of homosexuality must have surfaced" and he was willing to gamble on his future career.
In Wei Wei's eyes, "Their World" has a "marginal discriminatory, excluded sense of the other", and Wei Wei wants to write "our world", "from the standpoint of a homosexual, bring in my experience, perspective and position." ”
Looking back more than a decade later, he felt he had made the right bet.
During the eight months of research back home, everything went well. After returning to the United States from Chengdu, he spent four months to complete his doctoral dissertation in one go, without revision, and then was rated as an outstanding thesis, which is the "most cattle X thing" that he still considers to himself.
After entering Shanghai University and East China Normal University as an "American sea turtle", the publication of the paper was also smooth. In 2015, a project to study the families of same-sex couples in contemporary China was supported by a ministry of education that was previously "something I could never have imagined."
The process of evaluating professors was also smooth. Originally, he was worried about the sensitivity of the research direction, but 15 people in the 16 judges voted for him, making him feel the joy and pride of being recognized.
The classes he wanted to take were opened without much resistance; under his direction, students founded a community focused on sexual minorities, the "Round House", where young people held book clubs on gender-diverse themes...
These things that he had expected and liked were realized step by step.
He admits that he has taken a shortcut, "There are too few people studying this field in China, and it is easy to 'pop up'." He felt fortunate that the weather and the place were favorable, and he had only come all the way to today, and ten years earlier or ten years later might not be able to arrive.
What Wei Wei used to mention to people repeatedly was the somewhat inspirational story after he went to the United States to study in 2000: a young man who had been inferior because of sexual orientation began to explore himself under the impact of open culture, made some achievements in academics, and later became one of the few gay scholars in China to study gay issues, and then to inspire the young generation of comrades in China.
He rarely mentions the prequel to this story—his time at Peking University. One year, I met a teacher at Peking University and said, "Wei Wei, I don't think you've changed much over the years." "He was a little unhappy. How could it not have changed?
When watching the movie "To Youth", he always thinks of his youth: a county college entrance examination winner fell into the school bully, and his self-confidence was frustrated; the problem of sexual orientation emerged, there was no information channel, no one to tell. He believes that his youth is "dark and in the valley", and self-ridicule has not really experienced "youth".
Self-empowerment
Qin Shan had already learned about this "professor who came out of the public" before the first-year wei Wei's class, and also had gender awareness enlightenment, but it was still "quite shocking" to hear Wei Wei talk about LGBT+ content very bluntly in class.
At the end of the group homework report, Qin Shan stood on the podium and reported on the theme of his group: about the comradely safety awareness of colleges and universities. He knew that after making this report, it was equivalent to coming out in front of his classmates.
He looked at his classmates in the audience, "didn't make a wow sound, didn't ask me other questions", most of the people's reaction was no response, which is enough to make people feel at ease.
Earlier, in a recess, when he saw Wei Wei drinking water in the hallway, he wanted to report on the progress of his homework, but he was followed by other students and felt a little embarrassed.
"When other students hear me talking about this, will they think I'm talking about myself?" He said to the students behind him, "Or you should avoid it first, and I will talk to Teacher Wei Wei alone for a while." The classmate didn't ask why, and turned and went into the classroom.
After Wei Wei finished talking about his homework, he said to him, "Actually, you don't have to worry, you see that I have actually lived well in the academy for so many years, bright and happy." When you take that step, you'll find that it's not as much of a criticism as you might think. If you are gay, you can be bold. ”
Qin Shan always remembered the conversation in the corridor, and at that moment he knew that Teacher Wei had already "seen through him."
In Wei Wei's view, the pressure for many people to come out is self-imposed. "After coming out, there will be a very large process of self-empowerment, and only when 'I' accept myself and solve my own problems can I cope with the outside world." He hopes that students will also have this process, the environment is difficult to change, but the psychological barrier must be passed by themselves.
Watching Qin Shan go from being "introverted" and "shy" in his freshman year to now being "little famous" in the circle through his own research, this change makes him proud.
Wei Wei was often surprised by the younger generation of comrades, that calmness in group identity. Maybe it would make him compare his first experience coming out. "There is no one around who can teach me, no one I can talk to, no one to discuss."
By the time he went to study in the United States, he had overcome some psychological obstacles and explored gay life like a beginner. The first time I went to Gay-bar, I lingered in the doorway for a long time, and finally made up my mind to go inside, and nothing special happened.
Other explorations include volunteering at a local gay library, meeting new people at bars, including sexual exploration...
Once, a female teacher walked into the office with her child, and Wei Wei saw her working with her child and said to her: This practice of balancing family and work can reduce the burden on her husband a lot, right?
The teacher smiled at him and said, "This is my child with My Partner, I am a lesbian." Her calmness at that moment gave him strength and became "a moment of liberation that he will never forget."
In the final thesis of a course that semester, he wrote about the semantic changes of the word "comrade" in Chinese society, and came out of the closet when he was giving a report in class.
He probably didn't think that after he became a teacher one day, every year there would be students coming out in public in his classroom. Now at East China Normal University, young people at least have the opportunity to stop repeating his entanglements.
Coming out is not a matter of reasoning
It's about feelings
(Photo of Wei Wei during his speech)
One year, Qin Shan's parents came to see him at school, talked about their life and topics at school, and talked about their teacher Wei Wei.
Mom asked if Teacher Wei was married, and he said no, but he had a boyfriend and the two had been together for more than ten years. Mom didn't answer the phone again.
Qin Shan thought that if her mother knew about Teacher Wei's existence, she might be able to understand all this better. Judged by traditional standards, this is a respected and accomplished teacher. "At that moment, I felt that at least Teacher Wei would refresh some of her impression of comrades, and when she heard that such a very successful teacher was a comrade and had a stable life, I thought it would give her a reassuring pill."
That is actually Wei Wei's coming out philosophy: "Coming out of the closet is not a matter of reasoning, but a matter of feelings." ”
During the Mid-Autumn Festival in 2003, he originally made a cross-ocean phone call to tell his parents that the holidays were happy, but the topic changed, and his mother asked him why he wanted to do gay research, and then came the sentence "Are you yourself (comrade)?" He could only admit it.
Later, he argued with his parents many times, but found that it was wrong. "You have to tell your parents what kind of person you are and what your life is like through your actions."
When he returned to Chengdu six months later for a research interview, his parents went to the airport to pick him up. "They must have thought, 'Am I going to turn into a monster?' But seeing me normal, healthy, sunny, you might be relieved. ”
He even took his mother to Gay-bar to see a show. As soon as his mother began to twist and squeeze, he advised, "No one will pay attention to you." That night, they watched a more entertaining anti-string performance, and my mother was very happy after watching it, and soon after that, she "turned a corner."
(Wei Wei was a guest at the 2018 Shanghai Queer Film Festival, where the documentary "Dazzling on the Beach" showed behind the scenes of a cross-dressing show in Shanghai in 2017.) ）
Father accepted more slowly. When Wei Wei wrote the book "Open", although his parents also helped collect media reports on gay issues, his father also worried, "Can you use a pen name to publish this book?" Wei Wei felt both angry and funny, "I want to use this book to start my academic career, how can I use a false name?" ”
After "Open" was out of stock, it was not republished, and the price of genuine books on the Internet soared to several hundred yuan, and parents realized that this was a very important book.
The shift happens little by little. Mom would search for every comment on the book on the Internet and share it with Wei Wei, and Dad would secretly read the book. Last year, he took his dad with him to Rainbow Cruises, and that was the first time he took his dad to an event after mom left.
Wei Wei's parents have been to Shanghai three times, each time staying for more than a month, and his life with BF will be unreservedly shown to his parents.
This afternoon in an interview with Nandu Weekly, Wei Wei recalled the Lantern Festival before his mother's death, and his partner flew from Shanghai to Chengdu to see her for the last time, and his mother took his partner's hand and said: "I am particularly relieved to see that you are living so well." ”
At that time, Wei Wei heard these words a little "can't stand it" and turned around and hid in the kitchen. Speaking of this matter now, he still sheds tears without warning.
A class dedicated to sex and gender
This year, when he learned that "Queer Culture" would be upgraded from an elective course to a core general studies course for undergraduates at East China Normal University, Wei Wei did not hide his joy.
He would always mention positive, successful, positive deeds to people over and over again. "If you overemphasize pessimism, there's no way to change it. To change, there must be hope. That is the characteristic of Wei Wei, as a sociologist, who is not "sociological" enough, and he likes to emphasize the individual's ability to act.
When Professor Sun Zhongxin of Fudan University opened the "Introduction to Homosexual Studies" course in 2005, some media believed that this year was "the turning point of China's gay farewell to the secret era", which provoked many discussions, including criticism and incomprehensible voices, and after only one semester, the course was cancelled due to high exposure.
Until 8 years later, Wei Wei opened a course on "Queer Culture" at East China Normal University.
At that time, Wei Wei had already gained some popularity in the community, publishing the "Gay Theme Trilogy" in a well-known sociological journal such as "Society". "Teaching should be long," he judged, "and it will be time for the class to begin."
(Wei Wei's new book "Cool Reading Chinese Society")
After applying, the class started smoothly. Some people came to class out of curiosity, and every year when they talked about the beautiful culture, he asked the students to raise their hands and found that most of them were "rotten women". More people really need such a classroom, a platform to know themselves and accept themselves.
At present, there is no accurate data on the number of sexual minorities in China, but the consensus among people and communities who have long been concerned about gay issues is that the number of this group will not be small (3%-5%). Wei Wei felt that in front of such a large number of people, this course was necessary, and he wanted to "promote sex and gender education and disseminate positive, scientific and beneficial knowledge and information."
But he doesn't have much ambition to "change the big environment", he cares about the small environment: for example, his classroom, the scope is a little wider, it is the gay community in Shanghai, which is the scope of his ability to radiate.
Some time ago, he suddenly remembered the first gay student he brought with him and sent him a text message greeting. The student replied that he had just bought a house in Wuxi, and that "the years were quiet and really happy." Wei Wei was also very happy. The individual in the sun is the most important, and that is his greatest hope for the younger generation of comrades, hoping that they "live in the sun, study well, live well, have fun, and love well." ”
(Liang Short, Qin Shan, Lu Xiao are pseudonyms)
Do you think universities should offer such a course?
Source| Nandu Weekly
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