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My name is Li Ming, I am 36 years old, and I am an ordinary office worker. My wife Xiaoli and I have been married for seven years and we have no children. My family lives on the outskirts of the city, and the environment is quite peaceful. I work under pressure, but I can handle it.
The smell of Xiaoli's cooking fills my living room every day, she is an excellent cook, and she always cooks all kinds of food for me. My relationship with Xiaoli has always been very good, and my life is happy.
However, more than a year ago, a small accident began a family conflict.
It was an ordinary summer, and the night breeze was blowing, and Xiaoli and I were sitting on the sofa in the living room watching TV. Suddenly, Xiaoli called, and her tone was a little anxious: "Hey, sister, what are you talking about? My niece is coming to live for a while? Why? Well, okay, I'll discuss it with Li Ming." ”
After hanging up the phone, Xiaoli looked at me with a somewhat embarrassed expression: "My dear, my sister said that her daughter needs to find a place to live in the city for a while because of the school dormitory problem, and she wants her niece to come and live for more than a year, what do you think?"
I was a little hesitant, after all, we were already comfortable in our lives, and suddenly having one more person would have an impact on our lives: "This...... Xiaoli, isn't our family quite good now, will one more person be crowded?" I asked tentatively.
Xiaoli sighed: "I know, but my sister said that her daughter needs a stable environment now, and she has also found several houses in the city and has no place to live, we are her last hope." ”
I looked at Xiaoli's eyes, and finally nodded: "Okay, since that's the case, then let's take her over." ”
The next day, Xiaoli's niece Xiaofang came to our house. Xiaofang is a seventeen or eighteen-year-old girl with a delicate appearance, and her first impression is not bad. We warmly welcomed her and arranged a comfortable room for her.
At the beginning, everything went quite smoothly, and Xiaofang was also very well-behaved and sensible. She does her own laundry and cooks every day, and she also knows how to respect our living habits. Xiaoli and I are also very pleased, and feel that we should be very happy with Xiaofang during this time.
Gradually, however, some minor contradictions began to emerge. I noticed that Xiaofang sometimes piled her clothes in the living room, and sometimes even wandered around the living room in her pajamas. At first, I didn't pay much attention to it, thinking that it might be because she was not used to it, but the situation has not improved.
A few months later, the situation became even more serious. I found that Xiaofang had become lazy, doing nothing all day, and was too lazy to do housework. Once I came home and found the living room in a mess, with clothes and miscellaneous items piled up on the floor, and I was so angry that I wanted to have a seizure.
"Xiaoli, look at what's going on?" I asked, pointing to the clothes all over the floor.
Xiaoli also looked helpless: "I don't know, I've told her many times, but she always doesn't change." ”
I was very annoyed by this situation, my comfortable life was shattered, and the order in my home became a mess. I began to think about how to deal with this problem, but I was a little hesitant, after all, Xiaofang is Xiaoli's niece, and I can't say anything too much.
I decided to find an opportunity to talk to Xiaoli about this. One weekend night, as we sat in the living room, I plucked up the courage to say, "Xiaoli, we need to talk about Xiaofang." ”
Xiaoli also knew that I was a little dissatisfied: "Yes, she has indeed gone too far recently, and I have told her, but she doesn't seem to care." ”
I took a deep breath and continued, "I don't think we can go on like this anymore, Xiaofang's behavior has seriously affected our lives. We need to talk to her and make her aware of the seriousness of the problem. ”
Xiaoli nodded: "I agree, but we have to pay attention to the way, after all, she is still a young man, and she may not be very sensible." ”
The next morning, we found a suitable opportunity, and I sat down with Xiaoli and talked openly and honestly about the issue with Xiaofang.
"Xiaofang, we want to talk to you about something. I got straight to the point.
Xiao Fang looked at us blankly: "What's the matter?"
I continued: "Recently, we have noticed that some of your behaviors are a bit unacceptable, such as stacking clothes at random, not paying attention to hygiene at home, etc. ”
Xiao Fang lowered her head a little embarrassed: "I'm sorry, I'll pay attention." ”
Xiao Li also said: "Xiao Fang, we are not blaming you, we just hope that you can realize the seriousness of this problem. As an adult, you should have a sense of responsibility. ”
Xiao Fang nodded and expressed understanding: "I know, I will correct it in the future." ”
Seeing Xiaofang's sincere attitude, Xiaoli and I were both relieved. Perhaps, this conversation can play a certain role, so that Xiaofang understands her shortcomings and makes changes.
However, it's not that simple. Although Xiaofang behaved slightly better for a while after the conversation, she soon returned to her original state, and even more indulgent herself. Xiaoli and I were once again in trouble, feeling helpless.
Gradually, I began to feel the tension of the family atmosphere. Every day when I get home, I feel an oppressive atmosphere, as if there is an unpleasant smell in the air. Xiaoli and I often quarrel over this issue, and our relationship has been affected to a certain extent.
I started thinking about how to fix it, but I didn't have a clue. I don't know what I can do to get Xiaofang to change her behavior and let us regain family harmony. I was lost in thought and felt like my whole body was becoming exhausted.
Perhaps, I need to discuss it with Xiaoli again and find a solution to the problem. This problem has been bothering us for a long time, and I don't want to see families break up because of this little problem.
Xiaoli and I decided to sit down again and have a serious discussion about it. One evening, we arranged an intimate time to sit in the living room and meet face-to-face.
"Xiaoli, we have to find a solution to Xiaofang's problem. I spoke.
Xiaoli frowned: "Yes, this problem has been bothering us for a long time, and we can't delay it any longer." ”
I pondered for a moment, then said, "I think we need to find a suitable time to talk to Xiaofang again." We need to make her realize that her actions have seriously affected our lives and that we can't tolerate it any longer. ”
Xiaoli nodded: "Yes, but we have to pay attention to the way, don't let her feel that we are blaming her, but hope that she can realize the seriousness of the problem and consciously correct it." ”
"Yes, we've got to give her a chance to understand that. I agreed.
So, we decided to wait for a suitable time to talk to Xiaofang about this again. Soon after, on a weekend evening, we found a suitable opportunity, and I sat down with Xiaoli and talked openly and honestly with Xiaofang about it.
"Xiao Fang, we want to talk to you about something again. I got straight to the point.
Xiao Fang looked at us with a nervous expression: "What's the matter?"
Xiaoli and I took turns to say: "Recently, we have found that some of your behaviors have had a certain impact on our lives, such as stacking clothes at will, not paying attention to hygiene at home, etc. ”
Xiao Fang lowered her head a little embarrassed: "I'm sorry, I'll pay attention." ”
Xiaoli and I looked at her and said in a soothing tone, "We don't blame you, we just hope you can realize the seriousness of this problem." As an adult, you should have a sense of responsibility. ”
Xiao Fang nodded in understanding: "I know, I will correct it." ”
Looking at Xiaofang's attitude this time, Xiaoli and I secretly breathed a sigh of relief, hoping that this conversation could have a role, so that Xiaofang could truly understand her shortcomings and make changes.
However, things didn't go as smoothly as we thought. Although Xiaofang behaved slightly better for a while after the conversation, she soon returned to her original state, and even more indulgent than before. Xiaoli and I felt disappointed and annoyed again, feeling helpless.
I began to consider whether I needed to take some drastic measures in order to make Xiaofang fully aware of the seriousness of the problem. However, I was also worried that this would have a negative impact on our relationship, after all, Xiaofang is Xiaoli's niece, and we don't want to hurt each other's feelings because of this issue. I felt like I was in a dilemma and didn't know what to do.
After a few attempts, Xiaoli and I both felt a hint of despair. We seem to have done our best, but the problem persists and even gets worse. I began to wonder if I was capable of solving this problem, and I began to wonder if there was still a glimmer of hope for harmony in our family.
One night, Xiaoli and I sat in the living room, silently immersed in our own thoughts. Suddenly, Xiaoli broke the silence: "Li Ming, I don't think we can go on like this anymore." ”
I raised my head and looked into Xiaoli's eyes, and found that her eyes were full of determination: "You mean ......"
Xiaoli continued: "I think we have to give Xiaofang a final warning, if she still can't realize the seriousness of the problem, we have to consider letting her go. ”
I was silent for a moment, then nodded, "yes, maybe this really is the last resort." ”
The next day, we decided to have a good talk with Xiaofang and give her one last chance. We sat down and talked to her about it in earnest.
"Xiaofang, we need to talk to you about something. I got straight to the point.
Xiao Fang looked at us with a nervous expression: "What's the matter?"
Xiaoli and I took turns to say: "We found that some of your behaviors have had a certain impact on our lives, such as stacking clothes at random, not paying attention to hygiene at home, etc. ”
Xiaoli continued: "We are not blaming you, we just hope that you can realize the seriousness of this problem. As an adult, you should have a sense of responsibility. ”
After listening to our words, Xiao Fang was silent for a while, and then said, "I'm sorry, I'll pay attention." ”
Xiaoli and I exchanged a look, and we both knew in our hearts that maybe this conversation was really the last chance. We decided to give Fang some time and see if she could make a change.
However, a few days passed, and Xiao Fang's behavior did not change at all, and even became more laissez-faire. Xiaoli and I fell into despair again, feeling like we couldn't do anything about it.
I started thinking about what I could do to fix this, but I couldn't find anything that worked. I felt helpless and hopeless, not knowing what to do.
Faced with Xiaofang's behavior not changing again, Xiaoli and I felt a deep disappointment. We've tried a number of ways to solve this problem, but none of them seem to have helped. We are stuck in a situation where we can't do anything about it, and we don't know what to do.
One evening, Xiaoli and I sat in the living room, immersed in our own thoughts. Suddenly, I decided to talk to Fang again and try to get to the root of the problem.
The next day, I found Xiaofang, sat in her room, and talked to her about it seriously.
"Xiaofang, we need to talk to you about something again. I got straight to the point.
Xiao Fang looked at me with a nervous expression: "What's the matter?"
I took a deep breath and said, "Xiaofang, I want to know, why did you become so laissez-faire?
Xiao Fang was silent for a while, and then said softly, "Actually...... I've always been lonely. ”
Xiaoli and I glanced at each other, and we both felt a trace of guilt in our hearts. Perhaps we paid too much attention to Xiaofang's behavior before, but ignored the real needs of her heart.
I took a deep breath and said, "Xiaofang, I'm sorry, we may not have given you enough care and support before. But you have to know that no matter what difficulties you encounter, we will be there for you. ”
Xiaoli continued: "Yes, Xiaofang, we are your family, and you can always share your feelings and troubles with us. ”
After listening to our words, Xiao Fang's eyes showed a trace of tears: "Thank you...... I've always felt lonely and I don't know how to deal with it. ”
Xiaoli and I looked at Xiaofang distressedly, and our hearts were full of guilt. Perhaps, our previous approach is not the best solution, we should pay more attention to Xiaofang's inner needs and give her more support and love.
Since then, Xiaoli and I have begun to pay more attention to Xiaofang's life, chatting with her often and sharing her joys, sorrows, and sorrows. We also try to give her as much love and support as possible, so that she can feel the warmth and care of her family.
Slowly, Xiaofang's mood also became much better, and she began to actively participate in the life of the family, no longer letting herself go as before. Our family has also returned to its former harmony and happiness.
Through this experience, Xiaoli and I have learned a truth: family harmony is not only about asking everyone to make changes, but more importantly, about giving each other more love and support. Only in this way can family members truly feel the warmth of each other and create a happy family together.
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