Wang Pengyuan is born slowly

Slow birth

◎ Wang Pengyuan

This year's weather is unusual, and in September there are still a few mischievous showers, specially selected to visit the city during the morning and evening rush hour, which makes the salarymen who are hurried by the roadside suffer. No, I'm also stuck in the office by such a rain. If you come to be safe, you may wish to make yourself a cup of tea, random music, night shadows outside the window, cold rain nights are also very interesting. I just didn't think that tonight happened to be played on Debussy's "Moonlight", accompanied by the sound of dripping rain, taking me back to that midsummer fifteen years ago.

I had just entered ninth grade, listening to "Moonlight" and writing homework late into the night, and when my parents were sound asleep, I secretly turned on the computer and went to play a love adventure game. This game is simple to say, through the time in the game, to trigger events with different heroines, with the increase of common experience and increase the favorability, can finally achieve positive results. Now look, such a small and exquisite game, for the adolescent ignorant me to outline the most hazy appearance of love. At that time, I also longed for a young and simple school love, but unfortunately it always ended up with my parents' mixed doubles. "Lang rode a bamboo horse and went around the bed to get green plums", a small note full of words of encouragement when the exam was smashed, the donut where the two went to watch a weekend movie together, even if they stayed wordlessly together in Xinhua Bookstore with the pages caressed by their fingertips, now they are all blowing a pool of spring water in their hearts, rippling in the memories of the summer that cannot be returned.

I used to think that my parents didn't know love. After all, unlike the unbridled love of youth, I have never heard my parents talk about "love" to each other. On the contrary, my father likes to read, but my mother always opposes my father buying books because books are expensive and occupy space; The father is stubborn, and the truth he has identified cannot be pulled back by eight cows, and the mother's repeated advice is only taught repeatedly; Not to mention the shadow of childhood, because my mother was addicted to mahjong, and the family was on the verge of being broken. I used to wonder how the two with such different personalities could get together in the first place. Until that time my father had surgery, because the anesthesia had passed, lying on the kang moaning and wailing, when I was still watching TV in the living room, my mother hurriedly called me over, scolded me with a split face, and said: "Your father is in such pain, how can you not move over there." After that, the mother held her father's hand tightly, tears streaming down her eyes to comfort her father, saying, "It won't hurt for a while, and it won't hurt for a while." At that time, I didn't think anything, I just thought that the TV was so wonderful, it was a pity to miss it, and now I don't remember what program I was watching at the time, but I was moved by the love between my parents.

In fact, if you think about it, there is still love between parents, although when I was a child, the two quarreled, and the words on my lips were that when I grew up, they would divorce each other, but after saying these twenty years, it seems that the only role is to leave an indelible shadow on my young heart. When I have grown up and entered the age of standing, the relationship between my parents has become deeper and deeper. My father had heart surgery, and when I encountered something, he and I were more anxious and sharp, and my mother would always reconcile and persuade me not to always make my father angry, and think more about my father's body, and at most things would be "good, good, good" and "yes, yes, yes" should come down; His father always likes to go out and stroll, pinning a literati's feelings between the landscapes and countryside, and gradually his mother, who does not like to go out, is always by his side, and there are more photos of the two. Although the old couple still stumbles from time to time, they have always supported each other and gone through the past thirty years.

Perhaps this is also the inheritance of family customs, grandfather and grandmother have been together for a lifetime. My grandmother left this year, listening to my uncle, in the last moments of my grandmother's life, my grandfather lay on the edge of the kang, shouting, "You go, you go", I still can't figure out whether my grandfather can't bear to suffer any more pain for my grandmother, or whether this is the last concern for my wife and children in this life. I returned to my hometown for three or two days during the summer vacation, accompanied by my grandfather, who could not eat much, but he had to drink two or two drinks for each meal, and his spirit was not confused. He murmured to me that my grandmother had married into our family since she was seventeen years old, and that grandfather was nineteen, and the two of them had gone through ups and downs, lived through poor days, and survived hard days, and it has been more than 70 years now, but they have never blushed. My grandfather said to me, this is how he lived, and now that he has lived in the same household, there is no one who is not satisfied, but this is the first time he has left his grandmother to live alone. A few words, but my head exploded, remembering that when I was celebrating the New Year this year, my grandmother was already unable to remember people and events due to Alzheimer's disease, and when we were preparing for the New Year's greeting, I suddenly sat on the kang and babbled anxiously, and tears were about to fall. We juniors didn't know why, thought there was something, gathered in a circle, grandmother after a long time suddenly broke into laughter, pointed to grandfather and said, "He, he wears a big red jacket."

I used to think that vigorous love must either break through difficulties and dangers, or have family bonds, or have worldly bonds, but I don't admit that the biggest enemy of love is time. Some people have interpreted Wong Kar-wai's films, ostensibly talking about martial arts, Lizi at first glance is talking about urban love, but in fact it is talking about time: time determines emotions, time continues emotions, and time ends emotions. Now that I am in my prime, I sometimes think that if I am like my grandfather and grandmother, if nothing else, I am afraid that I will live to be more than 100 years old at this age alone. I can't help but wonder, after all, the current carriage is not slow, the letters are very short, and I want to come to my life... Not long ago, I talked with college classmates, there were single people who deeply felt the same feelings, and there were those who were sad that campus love could not last to the end, but there were more from twenty-nine years to the year of establishment and a family, and finally, exclaimed that our class had known each other for more than ten years.

In a flashback of his thoughts, the song "Moonlight" ended, the rain had stopped, and he walked out of the office, and the stagnant water on the pavement reflected a little bit of jade-white moonlight. The moonlight is beautiful tonight.

Wang Pengyuan, originally from Yantai, Shandong, is currently a staff member of a university in Zhuhai and a member of the Yantai Prose Literature Association. Loves reading and writing.

One Point Yantai Prose

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