Incident of a six-year-old boy entering a girl's bathroom
"You have to apologize to my 6 year old son! Ask for his forgiveness! ”
A mother roared heart-wrenching in the women's bathroom.
The incident was caused by a heated debate caused by a 6-year-old boy entering the women's bathroom some time ago, and the matter was very much troubled on the Internet.
It has even triggered countless families to think about "sex education", let's review it first.
During the holidays, female college student Xiaomei (pseudonym) wanted to go home to see her parents well, so she deliberately came to the train station early and went to the bathroom while waiting.
Seeing one of the toilet doors displaying a green "unmanned logo" on it, he boldly opened the door...
What appeared in front of Xiaomei's eyes was a boy, with his back to her convenient picture, Xiaomei subconsciously stepped back, and after calming his good mood, he said casually:
"You are a boy, you can't go to the women's bathroom"
Immediately after Xiaomei's ears, there was a voice that broke his mouth and cursed: "Kao, who scolded my child!" ”
The child's mother came out of the compartment door and scolded while pushing the door:
"He's only six years old, you have to apologize to my son! Ask for his forgiveness! ”
"Don't you have a uterus? From the countryside?! ”
The child next to him was obviously frightened by his mother's situation, and cried wow.
After the mother saw the child crying, she was even more crazy to use the irritable output:
"You have hurt my child's young heart! You scared him to tears, and he was not allowed to leave without apologizing"
Xiaomei was even more aggrieved, and she was obviously defeated:
"So what if I'm still a girl under 18? What if I was scared to cry? ”
......
The video is very long, in which we can clearly see that Xiaomei is not the mother's opponent at all, plus the mother "lottery" later, after adding the "assistance" of the husband.
Xiaomei even collapsed to cry, and she could not forget this verbal violent attack in her life.
So, what did Xiaomei do wrong? In fact, the dramatic scene in this women's bathroom ripped off the fig leaf of many family pathological education.
The first layer of cloth, the phenomenon of boys entering the women's dressing room/toilet/bathhouse
It is clear that the boy's mother won the scene, but did not win social recognition.
There are overwhelming accusations and abuse against the mother on the Internet, and many girls have sided with women's universities, because everyone resonates too much!
A girl posted that in a swimming pool she frequented, she often saw many little boys in the women's locker room, all brought by her mother.
Shockingly, some boys are even teenagers, and now children are developing very well and are not low in size.
Once I was washing my hair, and when I looked up, I found a boy staring at his S, and to the shame of the girl, the boy also had a physiological reaction?
Seeing this, the editor is also puzzled in his heart, teenagers? It's almost junior high school, and at that time they all began to memorize "Young China said".
It's not a boy, it's a teenager.
The explanation given by the pool staff was: "He is still young, he doesn't understand anything."
The reason for such prevarication is really disappointing. In fact, to be honest, I believe that most women mind being spied on by the opposite sex, regardless of the age of the boy.
The most direct reason why boys frequently enter women's places is that mothers do not respect the views of other women.
Mothers are understandably caring for their children, but everything should have a degree.
For those fully exposed women's places, if the father has something inconvenient, it can be led by the mother occasionally.
But the mother must not take everyone's understanding for granted.
Because there is no woman who is seen by the opposite sex without permission.
It is precisely because these boys are "brought up from childhood" that more and more contradictions occur.
In this regard, there are also families whose mothers are very principled, and here are some very positive examples.
A mother takes a 4-year-old, two-month-old child to the mall, and on the way the father is trying on clothes at the mall, and the child suddenly wants to go to the toilet.
The mother, who was trying to take her child to the toilet, quickly realized the problem. So I waited until my father arrived and asked him to take the child into the men's bathroom.
In fact, in many cases, mothers can solve the problem of mutual respect in many ways.
Another mother posted that when she took her child into the women's bathroom, she would put an eye patch on him and wait outside.
In fact, the degree of debate on this topic is not a fuss, but really involves the issue of children's "sex education".
The second layer of cloth, when the child is old, should he receive correct sex education?
It is widely accepted internationally that appropriate sex education can begin around the age of two to five.
However, many parents will find it "difficult to say", or even "embarrassed" and never mention it.
This indirectly "promotes" some bad phenomena in many public places, such as in public places, you will see some children bending over to peek at the women's bathroom, or even lying on the ground to peep.
In this regard, some people abroad have made a special study on this, and Emma Kenny published a column on related issues in the British "Daily Mail":
Some people's voyeurism is closely related to "the poor way of getting an early childhood."
So we can see that the child when he was a child is like this (left), and it still does not change when he grows up (right).
All the bad habits you think of as occasionally growing up are directly related to some of the bad life experiences you received as children.
So how old is the child to enter the women's bathroom "as he wants"?
In fact, this topic has always been controversial not only at home, but also abroad.
But Hong Kong has a clear rule: children over the age of five cannot enter the bathroom of the opposite sex.
Many places in the United States have a third restroom, such as: "Family restroom", even if some places do not have a third bathroom, it will be clearly marked:
"Boys over the age of six go to the men's bathroom"
We can actually understand that because "children are small", we are not worried about going to the toilet alone, but we must not do "sex education" guidance because "children are small".
Many children, when they are young, ask their parents, "Where am I from?"
Many parents will prevaricate and answer: "E~um~ picked it up!" ”
In fact, just like "1+1=2", children have the right to know the answer to every objective fact.
We can generously tell them, "Mom's body has an organ called the womb, and that's your little house, where you eat and absorb nutrients." ”
"When it's getting bigger, I'll go out through a passage on my mother."
This tells them the right answer both scientifically and interestingly, and since the children ask this question, it means that they have gradually become curious about more things around them.
Or become curious about certain characteristics of our body, some basic sexual knowledge we should pass on to them.
As early as 2002, the American Sanitary Association issued a view on "sex education from infancy".
Because they are still crying babies, they instinctively become sensitive to physical contact, and once their emotions are not well controlled, they cry or make trouble.
By patting or touching them by their mother or the people around them, they can gradually calm down.
We can tell them at the age of 0-2 not to pay too much attention to their physiological organs, as little as possible in public places to wear open pants, diapers, etc.
At the age of 3, you should be told to have a clear gender view of boys and girls, and you can't peek at random.
When you are 3 to 6 years old, you should let them know that you should not let the opposite sex have casual contact, and no one else should change your clothes and bathe except for your relatives around you.
I have seen a news report before, on the bus, an old man touched a 6.7-year-old girl next to him, and in the process of touching the little girl's lower body, the little girl actually did not respond, allowing the old man to touch.
Still someone in the same car really couldn't stand it, and called the police.
The little girl apparently knew nothing about "sexual knowledge," and it was these gaps that kept her from knowing that she was being harmed.
Sometimes we often think that our children are "white as jade", naïve to a blank piece of paper is the best, in fact, it just makes them lack basic common sense, harm them do not have the right values, can not protect themselves, and even affect life.
And it is this excessive care for children, seemingly careful, but in fact depriving children of the opportunity to grow independently.
The third layer of cloth, the "deformed heart of the beloved son", is actually depriving the child of the right to grow
There is a saying that is true, in the eyes of parents, "their own children will always be a child".
And this line of worry has been tightly tied since the birth of the child, 3-year-olds will worry, 10-year-olds will worry, and even 20-year-olds will worry...
And this kind of "can't let go" love is actually a kind of bondage, and even harms children in disguise.
As in the incident we mentioned at the beginning, why did the child not cry at first, but howled in the mother's angry rebuke of the female college student.
One possibility is that he is frightened, but there is also a possibility that he is relying on his mother's support to vent his dissatisfaction.
And under the "deformed protection" of the mother, will he have a vague sense of morality that he should have, or a kind of I am originally a vulnerable group:
"You bumped into me, you should apologize to me."
Obviously, such a deformed heart of love for the child is likely to push the child to an extreme, and even go to the point of no return in doting.
In the process of children being born, they are actually like a blank piece of paper, and our parents should teach our children how to hold the pen correctly.
How to draw and develop depends on the child himself.
It was also a little boy, about 4 years old. He went to eat KFC with his mother, and there was a lot of traffic in the fast food restaurant, and during the meal, the boy suddenly wanted to go to the toilet.
Although the mother felt embarrassed, she still decided to take the boy into the women's bathroom, but the boy looked at the crowded women's bathroom and said to his mother resolutely:
"I'm a boy, I'm going to the men's bathroom!"
The girl's mother was helpless to work at the door of the toilet, and finally the men in the men's toilet came out, and after vacating the location of the men's toilet, they said:
"Hurry up and get in, or the baby will pull her pants"
The mother went in while apologizing, and after cleaning up the child in a panic, she still apologized to everyone with her face.
From here, we can see that some children have a clear definition of "sexual awareness" and "right and wrong" at a young age, while some children will feel that some things are "taken for granted".
Of course, this is inseparable from the correct education of parents, so we should re-face our children's view of education and correctly export the knowledge of "sex education" to them, rather than secretive.
After the right guidance, let them grow and develop on their own.