Do not give birth to a baby, do not know the mother's suffering.
I have heard this sentence countless times, from the mouths of various people, there are mothers, relatives and aunts, there are grandmothers, and even once, this sentence is heard from the mouth of colleagues.
Giving birth to a child is very painful, and raising a baby with a bear child is very tiring. Treat the person who said this sentence with a kind of reverence, it is not easy to have a child, and it is even more difficult to be a mother. However, I didn't really understand how difficult it was, and I didn't really understand what kind of difficulties they would encounter.
It wasn't until I watched the recent hit family drama "Dear Little Child" that I had a deeper and more detailed understanding of this sentence.
Giving birth is painful, but what really gives mothers a headache is more than that. More, in fact, after giving birth to a child, it is a variety of trivialities, which are mixed with emotional contradictions, family contradictions, and parenting contradictions that arise after giving birth.
Very fine, very miscellaneous, very hurtful! "Newborn Mom" has 4 states to go through!
1: Pregnant in October
Pregnant in October, the pregnant mother's body first changed, with a big belly, and no longer had an elegant figure. In order to maintain the nutrition of the baby, the body began to be bloated, puffy, beautiful clothes could not be worn, could not wear makeup, and even the face also grew pregnancy spots, thick foundation could not cover.
Once, that glamorous girl suddenly stepped into another state of life. That look is the self that I once dared not imagine. However, at the same time, new life is being conceived, psychological changes also follow, more concern for the baby in the abdomen, the beginning of prenatal education, the beginning of self-talk, the soul is no longer lonely, tired and happy.
The opening chapter of "Dear Child" is Ren Suxi's one-man show.
Fang Yinuo, who she plays, stands in front of the mirror and looks at herself. Habitual makeup removal, seeing the pregnancy spots on his face, first doubtful, then lost, and then quickly removed makeup, looking at himself in the mirror. She wanted to cry, but the pregnant mother's mood swings were too big for the child, and she forced herself to hold back the tears and squeeze out a smile.
However, no one could control his emotions perfectly, and Fang Yinuo still did not hold back and cried out.
The scene in "Dear Little Kid" is short and doesn't have a single line. However, the audience can see the story behind the actor from the change of her expression and see the real state of a pregnant mother. The character created by Ren Suxi, emotions arise from the outside in, and then gush out from the inside out.
The change in Fang Yinuo's appearance is painful, but as a pregnant mother, her psychological state of forced smile and haggard is even more pitiful.
2: Childbirth
If during pregnancy, the suffering of pregnant mothers comes from changes in the body, then when giving birth, the greatest pain is the pain of childbirth. This kind of pain can only be borne by yourself, and others cannot help you share the slightest bit, not even your husband who loves you, your own dear parents and mothers.
This pain mainly comes from the body. Loved ones, doctors, and nurses will give encouragement, but in the end they will have to bear it on their own. Moreover, if it happens to meet an irresponsible father, it is a double destruction of spirit and body, adding to the helplessness.
"Dear Child" Fang Yinuo gave birth to a child very suddenly. She was repeatedly signaled so much that she even thought it was okay and asked her husband to take care of the work first. However, the accident still happened, Fang Yinuo suddenly gave birth, and Xiao Lu was still drunk at home. When I entered the delivery room, I was only accompanied by my mother and did not get the support of my husband.
Of course, in real life, in fact, many mothers give birth to children, very suddenly. There are special selections for the early morning, the time is not fixed, there are special picks at work, on the car, the location is not fixed. Also, give signals back and forth, repeatedly no response, constantly give you surprises, time and place are chaotic.
After Fang Yinuo entered the delivery room, his voice was exhausted, from being alive and vigorous until he was weak, and finally, he didn't even have the strength to say a word.
Then, after giving birth, her husband even left her alone and did not look for marginal things. Fang Yinuo was lying alone in the corridor, and the nurses couldn't see her and helped push her to the ward. In a trance, she heard others talking about helplessness, but at this moment she was powerless to get angry.
The husband finally came, and she needed someone to take care of her after giving birth. At this time, it was her most sloppy moment, the was pulled on the hospital bed, she let go of all her self-esteem, embarrassed, but had to bear it. Physically and mentally, suffered twice.
After watching so many episodes of "Dear Child", I think this plot should be the most deeply felt by the mothers. Of course, this is also the scene that impressed the audience the most. The episodes are filmed very thinly, all kinds of expressions, all kinds of panic, even if you are a father, you will have empathy for some of the plots.
It's the first time you're a mom and dad, and even if you're perfectly prepared before, you'll eventually be panicked by all kinds of chores. Xiao Lu disappeared for a while, waiting for him to return to the front of the delivery room, waiting for half a day, not knowing whether his daughter-in-law had come out or not, he had been waiting there stupidly.
This picture is an example of the praise of "Dear Child", which is real and grounded. After the husband's panic and the daughter-in-law's pain, after comparing with each other, you can experience the helplessness of the pregnant mother, which is really not a pretentious word.
3: Postpartum recovery
After experiencing the pain of childbirth, it was time for the sensitive postpartum period to confinement!
During this period, it is also the most tense moment of the relationship between husband and wife, and it is also the moment when family conflicts erupt in a concentrated manner. Postpartum recovery problems for pregnant mothers, newborn parenting problems, living habits problems with families getting together, concentrated outbreaks, do not give you time to react.
In the play, Fang Yinuo found Yue Jie, which was very good at the beginning, and Yue Yinuo's suggestion made her feel safe. However, with the passage of time, under the high degree of mental tension, she also had doubts about yuejie, Liu Lin acted very well, and all kinds of small eyes made the audience also doubtful.
The degree to which the newborn mother protects the calf is shown in detail in the play. Fang Yinuo is eager to accompany the child 24 hours a day, so she takes notes and firmly remembers the child's work and rest time, when to eat, when it is convenient, she must be accurate to the minute.
As a result, sister-in-law Yue had a little action, and she was suspicious of ghosts. During this time, her physique was still weak, her spirit was highly nervous, she did not eat well, she did not sleep well, causing her whole person to be very sensitive and her mood swings were very large. The child's illness and hospitalization exacerbated her anxiety.
As soon as this plot came out, many young mothers said that they did not dare to watch it, and the plot in the play was exactly the same as their own experience. Yes, this is also the key to "Dear Child" being able to get over the loop. This plot is very detailed and complicated, and there is not much dramatic conflict, but it makes the audience feel uneasy.
For ordinary audiences, what kind of plot is the easiest to empathize with, not a fierce quarrel that opens up and closes, not the bizarre encounter of the protagonist, but these details of life that can no longer be detailed, it makes you feel the temperature of life, face the bits and pieces that you have ignored, and reflect on whether it is possible to do better at that time.
Watching "Dear Child", some viewers said that Fang Yinuo was too sensitive, which the editor did not agree with. If you think about it in a different way, maybe you won't think so. What Fang Yinuo did was actually not very excessive, and her emotions were irritable, but her logic was quite normal, just saying that the film and television drama amplified the facial expressions of the characters, making us feel a little exaggerated.
But this is also the charm of film and television dramas, the problems you are easy to ignore in life, sometimes you will find the answer in film and television dramas.
4: Habits
Is life all frivolous? yes!
Isn't it joy to have children? Of course not!
In the hospital, I listened to my elders more than once, and obstetrics has always been the only department in the hospital that always has laughter. Most of the patients in other departments were sad, and the family members who visited did not have a smile on their faces.
However, when you walk around obstetrics, it is often full of laughter. Even the weak mother in the hospital bed will smile from the heart when she sees her child. After Fang Yinuo saw his daughter, the expression of crying and laughing was an example.
And the source of all this is because of the birth of a new life, which is the happiness of the family and the happiness of the mother. Everything for the sake of the child, the family can also make sacrifices for the sake of the child, and reconcile with life.
In "Dear Child", the contradiction between Fang Yinuo and his mother-in-law intensified, which in turn turned into a greater contradiction, and a large family often quarreled. In the end, in the crying of the male protagonist Xiao Lu, it was resolved, and the family began to rethink the way they got along, and the quarrels were much less after that.
On this point, the play does not show too much, in fact, it is also in line with reality. The same is true of anyone's family, if it has been as high-pressure as in the play, a large family would have dispersed long ago. Reconciliation in the run-in, finding balance in getting along is the solution.
Moreover, the birth of a child is not a big family trouble, and the joy and hope brought to the family are far greater than the pain.
In real life, when my relatives and friends talk about children, there is no one who is not full of smiles, how is my family treasure, how my son is, how it is. Because I have children, I don't like to bubble up, I like to play games, I don't play, and the whole person is much calmer, no longer surprised at first.
The child himself is a new student, but also for the parents to bring a new life, there are children and no children of the couple sentenced to two people.
5: Conclusion
Is the living situation reflected in "Dear Little Child" real?
authentic!
Is it happening much more in reality? many!
If not, I don't think there will be so much attention, and this drama is not a good drama.
So should we empathize with anxiety because of the plot in the play? Yes, but you don't have to empathize too much. Film and television dramas are based on life and are higher than life. Fang Yinuo's life is the superposition of many lives, it is an example, it is very special, and such a situation is really rare for a person to happen.
Don't have a baby, don't know the pain of being a mother. Without having a baby, you never know how difficult the first year of being a mother is.
Art comes from life and should also serve life.
Finally, I hope that while watching the drama, everyone will think more about the way family relationships get along, children are not trouble, it is hope!
Have you watched Dear Kids? What's the feeling? Welcome to leave a message to discuss!